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Child  Culture  in  the  Home 


A  Book  for  Mothers 


BY 


Martha  B.  Mosher 


'  The  destiny  of  the  nations  lies  far  more  in 
the  hands  of  women — the  mothers — than 
in  the  hands  of  those  who  possess  power." 

Froebel. 


New  York     Chicago     Toronto 

Fleming   H.   Revell   Company 


M  DCCC  XCVIII 


Mr 


Cop3Tight,  1898 
Fleming  H.  Rbvkll  Company 


7^  y  3^ 


TO  MY  OWN  BELOVED  CHILDREN, 
IN  WHOM  I  THUS  EXPRESS  MY  TRUST, 
I  DEDICATE  THIS  MY  EFFORT 
JN  BEHALF  OF  OTHER  CHILDREN. 

MARTHA  B.  MOSHER. 


He  who  helps  a  child  helps  humanity — with  a  dis- 
tinctness y  with  an  immediateness,  which  no  other  help 
given  to  human  creatures  in  any  other  stage  of  human 
life  can  possibly  give  again. 

Phillips  Brooks. 


CONTENTS. 


CHAPTER  PAGE 

I.  The  Emotions 11    r 

II.  The  Moeal  Sense 22  "Vv 

III.  Heredity  and  Environment 33  

IV.  The  Training  of  the  Senses    ....  46 
V.  The  Training  of  the  Will 60 

VI.  Punishment  and  Reward 74 

VII.  The  Value  of  Play 85 

VIII.  Self-reliance 102  "^ 

IX.  Character 113  "S- 

X.  Culture 129 

XI.  Language  and  Literature 144 

XII.  Manners 164 

XIII.  Habits  of  Childhood     .......  182  H 

XIV.  Habits  of  Youth 196  )^ 

XV.  Domestic  Economy 210 

XVI.  Civic  Duties 222 


PREFACE 


The  best  promise  for  to-morrow  lies  always 
in  the  best  fulfilment  of  the  opportunities  of 
to-day.  If  the  decision  regarding  the  eligibil- 
ity of  women  to  higher  social  and  political 
status  rested  on  their  success  as  homekeepers 
and  mothers,  a  favorable  one  might  be  warmly 
contested.  There  would  be  no  impeachment 
of  their  mother  love,  moral  appreciation,  or 
good  intention,  but  of  their  thoughtfulness, 
consistency,  and  knowledge  of  the  best  meth- 
ods to  secure  the  best  possible  development  of 
their  children. 

Everywhere  women  of  to-day  are  seeking 
improvement — their  energies  being  aroused  to 
the  utmost  by  the  new  independence  and  intel- 
lectual life  which  has  come  to  them.  The  fric- 
tion of  mind  with  mind,  the  stimulus  from  as- 
sociated ideas  is  awakening  thoughts  and  the- 
ories on  all  possible  subjects,  which,  if  wisely 
directed,  will  result  in  the  greatest  benefit  to 
mankind.  But  in  their  efforts  for  ameliorating 
human  conditions,  women  should  bear  in  mind 
that  the  best  study  in  the  humanities  is  in 
their  own  home.  The  more  one  observes,  the 
7 


8  Preface 

more  fervently  must  one  feel  the  power  and  in- 
fluence of  woman  in  the  life  of  the  race  and  of 
the  nation ;  and  mothers  are  earnestly  urged, 
not  only  to  place  their  best  efforts  in  the  home 
because  it  is  the  nursery  of  souls  and  from  it 
emanates  the  influence  which  guides  the  des- 
tiny of  nations,  but  also  to  ascertain  the  best 
methods  and  apply  them  with  zeal.  Knowl- 
edge is  of  little  value  unless  it  body  forth  in 
worthy  activity  and  a  fuller  sense  of  responsi- 
bility, at  least  to  the  nearest  duty. 

The  world  is  a  vast  school  which  the  child 
enters  at  birth,  and  from  which  he  is  only  re- 
leased by  death.  Education  is  the  most  impor- 
tant motive  in  that  school,  and  he  who  is  not 
advancing  is  retrograding.  Education  is  the 
Hebe  who  hands  man  the  elixir  of  the  gods — 
wisdom  and  power.  The  great  problem  is, 
what  are  the  best  means  of  distilling  this  much- 
sought  draught?  Old  methods  are  being  re- 
vised and  better  ones  evolved  to  meet  the 
broader  life,  and  this  generation  has  shown  it- 
self most  receptive  to  innovations  engendered 
by  new  conditions.  In  all  educational  depart- 
ments there  has  been  more  progress  in  method, 
and  a  better  application  of  new  methods,  than 
in  the  home,  the  place  of  all  where  the  influence 
is  the  greatest  and  most  enduring. 

The  new  educational  method  consists  in  a 
truer  appreciation  of  the  child  nature — its  long- 


Preface  9 

ings  and  capabilities,  and  confers  mentally  and 
morally  a  more  perfect  observation,  a  nicer  as- 
similation, a  finer  expression. 

The  endeavor  of  this  book  is  to  select  the 
most  essential,  vital  questions  pertaining  to  this 
progress,  to  urge  the  better  way  with  an  earn- 
estness that  will  move  some  thoughtless 
mother,  and  to  offer  a  few  practical  sugges- 
tions to  some  aspiring  one.  If  it  succeeds  in 
the  least  degree,  it  is  its  own  excuse  for  being ; 
if  it  does  not,  it  is  a  misjudgment.  Some  of 
the  thoughts  may  not  appear  directly  applica- 
ble to  the  child's  education,  but  these  indicate 
the  line  of  his  development.  Parents  must 
lead  the  child,  but  they  cannot  do  so  in  ad- 
vance of  their  own  enlightenment  and  appre- 
ciation. 

If,  by  any  suggestion,  a  single  home  is  made 
the  living  fountain  of  health  and  happiness 
that  it  should  be,  if  one  girl  or  boy  is  inspired 
to  a  truer,  more  cultured  womanhood  or  man- 
hood, the  author  will  account  herself  priv- 
ileged. 


Child    Culture 


THE    EMOTIONS 


Emeeson  has  said  that  the  great  difference 
between  men  is  in  their  power  of  feeling. 
Feeling  is  universal  and  becomes  an  element  of 
weakness  or  strength,  as  it  is  allowed  to  riot  or 
is  wisely  directed.  Unallied  with  the  moral 
sense  and  the  intellect,  it  degenerates  into  appe- 
tite and  passion,  in  the  exercise  of  which  man 
is  outdone  by  the  brutes,  to  whose  vehemence 
he  seldom  attains  and  then  only  revoltingly. 
But  purified  by  the  intellect  and  by  true  as- 
piration, judiciously  harnessed,  it  becomes  the 
strength  of  strengths,  the  fire  which  sets  in  mo- 
tion the  will,  the  energies  and  the  mental  fac- 
ulties. 

The  emotions  are  a  prime  factor  in  the  spir- 
itual life,  and  when  balanced  by  the  judgment 
into  perfect  harmony  with  it,  create  the  ideal 
man.  To  achieve  this  blending  of  the  emo- 
tions and  the  intellect,  requires  a  lifelong  study 
for  natures  that  are  born,  as  most  natures  are, 
11 


12  Child    Culture 

with  a  predominance  of  one  over  the  other.  It 
is  diflBcult  for  the  strongly  emotional  tempera- 
ment not  to  permit  itself  to  be  swayed  by  its 
desires  and  impulses;  in  fact  many  lives  are 
thrown  off  the  track  altogether  by  ignorance 
of  the  necessity  or  means  of  curbing  their  emo- 
tional impulses,  and  of  constantly  submitting 
them  to  the  control  of  their  reason.  This  ig- 
norance converts  a  great  power  into  a  great 
weakness.  The  man  lacking  emotional  vitality 
is  equally  imperfect,  for  a  cold  intellect  unsof-. 
tened  by  a  warm  heart  lacks  one  of  the  best  in- 
spirations to  virtue. 

It  is  easy  to  awaken  the  childish  heart,  and 
the  emotions  should  be  educated  before  the  in- 
tellect. Read  the  children  stories,  or  relate  cir- 
cumstances to  them  which  will  call  forth  their 
sympathies,  but  only  for  worthy  objects.  One 
can  easily  go  too  far  and  cultivate  a  spurious 
feeling,  a  sickly  sentimentality  that  would  be 
as  objectionable  as  a  lack  of  susceptibility.  It 
is  found  that  children  who  come  from  the 
slums,  the  offspring  of  the  uncultured  class, 
require  much  stronger  appeals  to  touch  their 
emotions  than  the  children  of  highly  developed 
families.  The  latter  are  apt  to  be  too  highly 
organized.  Experienced  kindergarten  teachers 
understand  the  point  perfectly.  A  teacher  who 
had  had  charge  of  a  phlegmatic  class  in  a  tene- 
ment district,  and  had  been  obliged  to  use  some 


The  Emotions  '     13 

effort  to  arouse  its  sensibilities,  undertook  to 
fill  a  temporary  vacancy  in  a  class  in  a  better 
neighborhood,  where  the  children  of  more  cul- 
tured families  attended.  Several  mothers  com- 
plained to  the  superintendent  that  their  chil- 
dren seemed  excited,  could  not  sleep  at  night, 
and  the  mothers  were  unable  to  quiet  them  or 
to  account  for  this  unusual  condition.  The  ex- 
perienced superintendent  considered  the  matter 
and  divined  the  cause ;  she  attended  one  of  the 
school  sessions,  when  her  conjecture  was  con- 
firmed. The  teacher  was  employing  the  same 
methods  with  these  more  sensitive  children 
that  she  had  found  necessary  with  the  impas- 
sive class.  The  superintendent  suggested  a 
selection  of  more  quieting  songs  and  games, 
and  the  difficulty  was  corrected.  Study  the 
child's  temperament,  and  try  the  following 
method  to  counterbalance  excess  or  lack  of 
emotion.  Give  the  highly  organized  child  sim- 
ple pleasures,  phlegmatic  attendants,  quiet  sur- 
roundings. Give  the  child  lacking  in  sensibili- 
ties more  stirring  pleasures,  a  livelier  maid,  a 
little  more  exciting  environment.  It  is  easy  to 
guide  in  the  right  direction  the  heart  of  a  little 
child,  its  nature  is  so  impressionable. 

A  teacher  tells  of  a  little  four  year  old  boy 
in  one  of  the  kindergartens,  who  used  so  many 
"  swear  words,"  that  for  the  good  of  the  others 
he  was  compelled  to  sit  apart.    He  was  per- 


14    '  Child    Culture 

fectly  willing  to  use  other  words,  but  until  he 
came  to  school  he  did  not  know  there  were  any- 
just  as  good.  His  home  surroundings  were  of 
the  roughest,  coarsest  kind.  The  kindergarten 
was  the  opening  of  a  new  world  to  him ;  he 
was  much  interested  in  everything  that  hap- 
pened, and  seemed  particularly  fond  of  the 
flowers  that  were  brought  to  the  kindergarten 
by  friends.  The  morning  after  Decoration 
Day  he  came  with  a  bunch  of  faded  clover, 
which  he  gave  to  the  teacher.  She  asked  him 
where  he  found  it,  and  the  answer  brought 
forth  a  touching  little  story.  He  had  been 
thinking  of  one  of  the  kindergarten  songs,  and 
the  thought  of  dewy  meadows  and  white  daisies 
and  clover  blossoms  really  growing,  had  touched 
his  imagination,  so  after  school  he  found  an 
older  boy  to  go  with  him,  and  they  started  on 
the  elevated  road  to  find  the  country.  Just 
where  they  went  no  one  knows,  but  he  found 
some  clover  and  brought  a  large  bunch  back 
with  him.  On  his  way  home  he  stopped  at  the 
kindergarten,  but  as  it  was  late  in  the  after- 
noon and  no  one  was  there  he  went  home,  still 
holding  tightly  the  beloved  bunch  of  flowers 
which  he  kept  all  the  next  day  while  the  kin- 
dergarten was  closed.  The  following  morning 
he  started  bright  and  early,  and  brought  his 
teacher  the  clover,  which  by  this  time  had 
entirely   withered.     He  told  her  he  had  tried 


The  Emotions  15 

to  bring  some  buttercups,  too,  but  "they  all 
broke." 

It  is  no  small  thing  to  secure  the  heart  and 
imagination  of  a  small  child.  A  wise  man  has 
said,  *'  To  fill  the  imagination  with  beautiful 
images  is  the  best  thing  that  can  be  done  to 
educate  little  children."  At  the  end  of  the 
year,  this  little  boy^s  mother  sent  the  teacher 
an  envelope.  When  it  was  opened  it  was  found 
to  contain,  as  an  expression  of  her  gratitude  for 
all  that  had  been  done  for  her  boy,  two  hard 
earned  dollars. 

To  touch  the  imaginations  and  emotions  of 
children  is  to  render  them  receptive  to  the  im- 
pressions one  wishes  to  make;  for  what  they 
feel  with  some  keenness  in  the  heart  takes 
stronger  hold  in  the  head.  The  heart,  as  the 
source  of  man*s  noblest  inspirations,  is  such  an 
important  factor  in  his  development  that  its  use 
cannot  be  overlooked. 

The  child  who  shows  an  undue  sense  of  fear 
can  only  be  reasoned  with  until  the  fear  is 
shown  to  be  unreasonable.  Some  parents  try 
to  destroy  the  feeling  by  forcing  the  child  to 
enter  dark  rooms  or  to  face  the  object  of  its 
fear.  I  have  known  a  child  almost  thrown  into 
spasms  by  this  injudicious  if  not  brutal  method 
of  cure,  while  there  are  few  children  who,  when 
their  reason  is  more  developed,  do  not  outgrow 
such  fear.     It  is  unnatural,  and  I  believe  is 


i6  Child   Culture 

always  superinduced  upon  children  while  they 
are  very  young  by  nursemaids,  who  frighten 
them  into  silence  and  submission,  never  realiz- 
ing the  enormity  of  the  act  or  its  lasting  injury. 
Apprehending  such  possibilities,  I  have  always 
explained  to  my  children's  maids  when  they 
first  entered  my  service,  the  harm  such  methods 
would  do  a  child,  and  have  forbidden  any 
words  containing  a  suggestion  of  objects  to  be 
feared.  A  child  should  know  nothing  of  ghosts 
or  hobgoblins. 

There  is  nothing  that  the  child-heart  longs 
for  and  appreciates  so  much  as  sympathy.  It 
is  a  talisman  by  which  the  heart  can  be  moulded 
to  whatever  the  parent  desires.  Discover  the 
existing  element  of  any  faculty  found  weak  or 
insufificient,  and  by  sympathizing  with  it,  it  can 
be  made  to  grow  to  the  desired  proportion. 

Parents  give  their  little  ones  food,  clothing, 
instruction,  often  everything  but  the  best  gifts — 
themselves,  withholding  sympathy  and  interest 
from  their  little  thoughts  and  happenings.  The 
children  are  absent  from  home  so  much,  if  they 
attend  school  and  spend  further  time  in  out-of- 
door  sports,  that,  when  they  are  at  home,  the 
busy  parents  forget  to  yield  other  interests  for 
a  time  and  give  heart  to  the  child's  affairs  by 
manifesting  an  interest  in  them. 

When  any  faculty  appears  excessive,  it  may 


The  Emotions  17 

be  reduced  by  refusing  to  sympathize  with  it, 
and  at  the  same  time  developing  other  powers 
to  balance  that  one. 

Hope  should  be  cherished  and  led  on  from 
the  hope  for  material  things,  which  will  prob- 
ably not  need  fostering,  to  a  hope  for  higher 
things  which  shall  culminate  in  a  power  of 
faith,  one  of  the  most  valuable  gifts  man  pos- 
sesses. It  is  the  faculty  of  hope  which  gives 
man  confidence  without  which  there  can  be  no 
success, — it  is  the  faculty  which  enables  a  man 
to  rise  when  he  has  fallen ;  to  try  again  when 
he  has  failed. 

In  nothing  do  children  differ  more  than  in 
the  kind  and  degree  of  their  affections.  Some 
children,  as  well  as  adults,  possess  only  their 
lowest  form, — the  instinctive  love.  It  is  the 
form  in  which  the  animals  love  their  young; 
men,  women  and  children  love  their  pets ;  it  is 
the  love  of  the  unwise  mother  when  she  cares 
more  for  the  child's  gratification  than  for  that 
which  bespeaks  its  ultimate  welfare.  It  is  the 
untrained  feeling,  and  needs  to  be  linked  to  the 
intellect  and  the  moral  sense  to  develop  into 
the  higher  forms. 

The  higher  form  is  that  which  desires  the 
good  of  the  beloved,  which  will  sacrifice  itself 
for  the  good  of  its  object.  It  is  manifest  in  the 
child  that  willingly  remains  quiet  for  a  long 
time  that  its  little  baby  brother  or  sister  may 


l8  Child    Culture 

sleep  undisturbed ;  in  the  little  girl  who  sews 
»-  for  the  dolly  or  shares  some  of  her  favorite  toys 
with  her  brother,  sister,  or  playmate;  in  the 
performance  of  any  act  which  is  not  pure  self- 
gratification,  and  whereby  the  loved  one  is 
benefited.  It  is  the  self-sacrificing  love  of  the 
mother  which  places  her  at  the  service  of  the 
family,  which  makes  her  willing  to  yield  her 
rest  and  ease  by  day,  and  if  need  be  by  night, 
to  attend  her  sick  child.  It  is  the  love  which 
makes  her  work  beyond  her  pleasure  that  her 
children  may  be  properly  fed  and  their  cloth- 
ing made  and  kept  in  repair,  the  love  which 
denies  the  child  that  which  may  be  detrimental 
to  its  health  or  morals; — it  is  the  love  which 
ennobles  life. 

The  highest  form  of  love  is  the  impersonal 
love,  which  has  no  fondness  in  it,  but  seeks 
merely  the  welfare  and  happiness  of  others. 
This-  is  the  love  of  the  philanthropist  and  re- 
former. It  contains  no  thought  of  self-gratifi- 
cation ;  it  is  love  in  the  abstract  and  includes 
that  "  Charity  which  thinketh  no  evil."  It  is 
the  love  which  we  are  admonished  by  Christ  to 
possess. 

There  is  also  the  passion  of  love  which  comes 
with  adult  age  and  which  leads  to  the  marriage 
relation.  This  form  is  often  mistaken  for  pure 
love  which  it  may  or  may  not  include.  When 
it  does  not  it  is  not  worthy  of  the  name.     If 


The  Emotions  19 

young  men  and  women  realized  the  difference 
between  a  love  which  is  simply  infatuation  and 
one  which  embraces  the  higher  qualities,  there 
would  be  fewer  unhappy  marriages  and  di- 
vorces, both  of  which  are  becoming  all  too  fre- 
quent. The  intensity  of  the  feeling  is  no  indi- 
cation of  its  purity,  only  of  its  sensuous  quality. 
He  who  wishes  to  test  the  purity  and  strength 
of  his  love,  will  ascertain  if  it  be  willing  to 
yield  its  own  indulgence  if  the  welfare  of  the 
beloved  demand  the  sacrifice. 

Some  human  beings  there  are  who  seem  to 
have  no  affection,  no  power  of  attachment,  and 
walk  ever  alone.  Harriet  Martineau  describes 
and  prescribes  for  these  unfortunates.  She 
says :  **  They  seem  doomed  to  a  hermit  ex- 
istence amidst  the  very  throng  of  life.  If  they 
are  neglected  they  are  lost,  they  must  sink  into 
a  slough  of  selfishness  and  perish.  And  none 
are  so  likely  to  be  neglected  as  they  who 
neither  love  nor  win  love.  If  such  an  one  is 
not  neglected,  he  may  become  an  able  and  use- 
ful being,  and  it  is  for  his  parents  to  try  this  in 
a  spirit  of  reverence  for  his  mysterious  nature, 
and  of  pity  for  the  privations  of  his  heart. 
They  will  search  out  and  cherish,  by  patient 
love,  such  little  power  of  attachment  as  he  may 
show,  and  they  will  perhaps  find  him  capable 
of  general  kindliness  and  the  wide  interests  of 
benevolence,  though   the   happiness   of  warm 


20  Child    Culture 

friendship    and  family   endearment   is   denied 
him." 

One  of  the  sweetest  qualities  a  woman  can 
possess  is  tenderness.  There  is  no  other  that 
renders  her  so  lovable  and  attractive.  It  is 
love  in  repose,  touched  with  compassion,  and 
seems  an  essential  quality  of  the  feminine 
nature. 

.  Wholesome  feelings  are  vastly  more  impor- 
tant than  logical  thought,  for  feeling  underlies 
thought,  and  the  just  regulation  of  the  feelings 

'  is  the  first  essential  of  civilized  man.  There 
are  natures  that  are  constantly  running  over 
with  feeling;  they  play  the  entire  gamut  of  the 
emotions,  effervescing  with  delight,  or  weeping 
and  despairing,  without  cause;  they  live  on 
Olympus  or  in  Hades,  and  in  action  such  per- 
sons are  as  unstable  as  they  are  in  feeling. 
If  they  cannot  entirely  overcome  their  moods, 
they  can  avoid  extreme  manifestations  of  tliem 
and,  by  a  determined  self-control,  attain  a  better 
equilibrium  and  a  more  wholesome  state.  A 
strong  antiseptic  for  the  overwrought  emotional 
temperament  is  the  intellectual  life.  Study 
and  brain  work  counteract  the  undue  excita- 
tion of  the  feelings.  If  the  emotions  are  al- 
lowed to  run  riot  in  childhood,  it  will  be  very 
difficult  to  overtake  them  at  a  later  period. 
No  very  intense  emotions  of  any  nature  should 
be  created  in  a  child's  soul;  it  is  better  that 


The  Emotions  21 

children,  should  not  often  feel  too  deeply.  Let 
us  have  more  genuine  honest  emotions  and  less 
of  the  premature  and  false. 

Carlyle  has  said,  "  There  never  was  yet  the 
wise  head  without  first  the  generous  heart." 
Generosity  is  a  quality  that  belongs  to  all  noble 
natures,  and  there  is  no  one  so  poor  that  he 
cannot  know  the  happiness  of  giving;  for,  if  he 
can  give  nothing  more,  he  can  give  crumbs  to 
the  birds,  or  he  can  give  his  services,  or  he  can 
think  generously.  Giving  is  not  all  of  generos- 
ity. To  think  and  to  judge  generously  are  as 
true  essences  of  the  generous  heart  as  gifts  that 
pass  from  hand  to  hand. 

"  Having  seen  the  egotism  of  sensuality  and 
of  intellect,  who  would  not  know  the  happiness 
resulting  from  goodness.  Do  not  look  down 
on  the  child's  simplest  acts  of  generosity, — it  is 
these  which  lead  the  soul  to  self-denial  and  to 
sublime  character.  Let  the  heart  as. well  as 
the  senses  and  the  intellect  have  feasts." 


n 

THE  MORAL  SENSE 

Different  nations  and  different  periods  have 
held  different  views  of  what  constituted  the 
perfect  man,  and  whatever  ideal  his  fellow-men 
liappened  to  hold  became  the  aim  and  object  of 
the  ambitious  youth  of  that  time  and  nation. 
Hereto  he  lent  all  his  energies  and  succeeded 
in  greater  or  less  degree.  Public  sentiment 
hoists  the  standard,  and  the  desire  for  public 
approval  is  instinctive  with  men.  The  majority 
bow  before  it.  But  what  is  the  public  and  what 
creates  its  sentiment  ?  The  public  is  but  the 
aggregation  of  many  individuals,  and  its  senti- 
ment is  the  last  result  of  the  thinking  of  the 
most  powerful  of  these  individuals.  These  usu- 
ally take  the  lead  aud  impress  their  principles 
and  beliefs  on  others.  Every  great  revolution 
and  all  evolution  are  first  the  conception  of  a 
single  mind, — a  mind  which  is  more  radical, 
more  enlightened,  farther  seeing  than  others  of 
the  time.  This  becomes  the  leaven  by  which 
the  masses  are  at  last  affected,  and  their  opinion 
in  turn  controls  the  attitude  of  the  rising  gen- 
eration. History  is  an  unbroken  procession  of 
advanced  thinkers  and  heroes,  to  whom  is  due 
22 


The  Moral  Sense  23 

the  progress  of  humanity.  Hnss,  Wickliffe, 
Luther,  struck  the  first  great  blows  at  the 
abuses  of  religion,  and  for  its  liberty,  standing 
for  conscience  against  the  world ;  Galileo,  Plato, 
Cromwell,  Hampden,  Lincoln,  Froebel,  Darwin, 
— and  many  others,  in  greater  or  less  degree, 
have  aided  in  the  social  and  moral  evolution  of 
mankind,  and  rendered  it  true  service.  They 
sometimes  stood  alone,  unacknowledged  by 
their  contemporaries,  but  recognized  by  subse- 
quent generations  at  their  true  value,  and  the 
principles  for  which  they  stood  became  incor- 
porated in  their  highest  ideals. 

Men  are  not  all  born  to  be  heroes  before  the 
world,  but  every  man,  by  the  establishment  of 
high  principle  and  by  a  faithful  adherence 
thereto,  can  be  as  true  a  hero  in  his  own  life  as 
he  who  shines  before  men. 

What  is  the  basis  of  high  principle  and  noble 
living  ?  It  is  the  moral  sense  ;  and  the  home  is 
the  school  where  the  moral  sense  is  educated  and 
man's  ideal  is  developed.  In  this  little  world, 
whatever  is  the  opinion  of  the  parent  becomes 
in  a  large  measure  that  of  the  child.  If  the 
parents'  ideal  is  a  man  of  intellect,  the  child's 
aims  will  be  intellectual;  if  the  parents'  aims 
are  worldly  advancement,  the  child  will  strive 
in  that  direction.  There  are  sporadic  cases  in 
which  the  child's  preferences  can  by  no  means 
be  made  to  conform  to  those  of  its  parents, — 


24  Child    Culture 

sometimes  to  its  advantage,  oftener  to  its  disad- 
vantage ;  but,  as  a  rule,  while  under  the  pa- 
rental roof,  the  child's  aim  will  be  determined 
by  that  of  the  parents.  This  is  a  point  which 
constantly  baffles  philanthropists ;  for  which- 
ever end  they  take  hold  of  in  endeavoring  to 
establish  reform  in  a  family  seems  to  be  the 
wrong  one.  The  plastic  nature  of  the  child  ad- 
mits of  moulding  so  easily,  that  one  feels  that  it 
is  the  prehensile  point ;  and  yet  to  secure  de- 
velopment seems  futile  so  long  as  the  child's 
environments  are  so  unfavorable, — so  long  as 
it  is  in  close  contact  with  an  ignorant,  indiffer- 
ent, and  perhaps  immoral,  mother. 

It  is  much  more  difficult  to  regenerate  the 
adult,  yet  without  her  cooperation  one  works 
against  such  serious  odds. 

The  best  statement  I  have  met  of  what  moral 
instruction  should  effect  is  this :  "  To  give  a 
power  of  self-control,  a  command  of  the  pas- 
sions and  desires,  and  to  direct  the  heart  and 
mind  to  high  and  worthy  ends."  A  man  may 
be  ever  so  brilliant,  profound  and  learned,  yet 
if  he  have  not  moral  power,  he  is  valueless  ;  it 
is  the  pivot  on  which  his  whole  value  hinges. 

Many  weaknesses  result  from  a  lack  of  com- 
mon sense  in  expecting  of  one  thing  what  be- 
longs to  another.  How  many  men,  ignorant 
from  love  of  ease,  or  poor  from  idleness,  or  un- 
generous from  shallow  sympathies,  groan  never- 


The  Moral  Sense  25 

theless  if  they  be  not  treated  as  are  the  learned, 
the  rich,  and  the  generous. 

Teach  the  young  from  the  beginning  the 
great  moral  law  of  cause  and  effect — teach  them 
not  to  look  for  wealth  without  work,  for  honor 
without  honesty ; — teach  them  that  character 
stands  above  surroundings ; — that  esteem 
should  be  bestowed  where  it  is  due.  The  ele- 
mental man,  with  his  vast  mental  and  spiritual 
endowments,  is  entitled  to  reverence  as  well  as 
he  whose  material  wealth  is  his  adornment. 

It  is  not  all  of  morals  to  moralize ;  less  pre- 
cept and  more  example  is  to  be  commended; 
the  living  realization,  the  quiet  suggestion,  the 
favorable  opportunity,  are  the  efficient  teachers. 
Ignorance  is  responsible  for  a  deal  of  wicked- 
ness, but  evil  example  and  parental  neglect  are 
responsible  for  vastly  more. 

The  greatest  and  noblest  of  the  moral  powers 
is  conscientiousness ;  it  is  the  basis  of  all  moral 
action.  There  is  no  race  nor  any  sane  individ- 
ual that  has  not  in  some  degree  a  sense  of  right 
and  wrong.  It  means  unmitigated  honesty  to 
oneself  and  one's  fellow-man,  the  faithful  follow- 
ing of  one's  idea  of  right,  the  avoiding  that 
which  one  feels  to  be  wrong.  This  sense  be- 
longs to  different  persons  in  different  degrees. 
The  merchant  who  hides  defects  in  his  goods, 
the  woman  who  dresses  and  entertains  beyond 
her  means,  the   child   who   promises   with  no 


26  -  Child    Culture 

thought  of  fulfilment, — all  are  lacking  in  con- 
scientiousness. Their  conduct  shows  want  of 
honor,  they  take  advantage  of  ignorance  and 
trust.  One  of  my  supreme  admirations  has 
always  been  Thomas  Babington  Macaulay,  who 
sought  strenuously  to  carry  a  measure  in  par- 
liament which  he  deemed  a  wise  and  beneficial 
one  for  others,  but  which,  had  it  passed,  would 
have  occasioned  him  the  loss  of  almost  his  en- 
tire fortune.  Such  heroism  can  but  command 
our  deepest  admiration.  The  truly  conscien- 
tious person,  then,  permits  no  thought  of  ex- 
pediency to  stand  between  him  and  his  sense 
of  right. 

Knowledge  and  wisdom  should  be  the  hand- 
maidens of  the  conscience,  else  it  may  prove  a 
curse  instead  of  a  blessing.  Some  of  the 
blackest  crimes  that  history  records,  the  most 
cruel  exactions,  have  been  perpetrated  by  men 
of  misdirected  consciences.  One  cannot  say 
that  the  Hindoo  mother  who  throws  her  babe 
in  the  river  in  fulfilment  of  her  idea  of  right, 
that  the  old  persecutors  who  thought  that  they 
were  serving  God  by  torturing  their  fellow  men, 
did  wrong.  They  followed  the  dictates  of  their 
consciences,  which  were,  however,  misdirected. 
And  who  shall  say  that  future  ages  may  not 
pass  judgment  on  many  points  of  our  conduct 
in  the  virtue  of  which  we  now  firmly  believe. 
Conscience  should  be  enthroned,  but  it  should 


The  Moral  Sense  27 

be  an  enlightened  conscience.  If  one's  views 
lead  one  to  act  at  variance  with  the  views  of 
the  best,  the  most  enlightened  people, — to  act 
against  nature,  I  would  not  say  "  Surrender," 
but  "  Beware,"  for  "  ancient  agreement  and 
long  concurrence  of  many  men  have  a  right  of 
authority  in  reason.  To  rise  above  this  is 
grand  action,  but  not  to  weigh  it  is  shallow 
thinking." 

There  is  no  more  pathetic  sight  than  a  strong 
power  of  conscientiousness  directed  toward 
wickedness.  We  see  this  illustrated  in  the 
case  of  children  born  and  reared  in  iniquity, 
who  have  no  power  to  help  themselves,  but  who 
are  taught  from  infancy  that  the  only  wrong  is 
not  to  be  adepts  in  stealing,  lying,  deceiving 
and  other  perversions.  Therefore  knowledge 
and  wise  perception  should  go  hand  in  hand 
with  conscience,  and  constitute  its  safeguards. 
A  child  who  has  known  the  pleasure  of  a  re- 
lieved and  approving  conscience,  even  at  great 
personal  inconvenience,  will  not  be  reluctant  to 
renew  the  experience. 

While  in  most  children  the  conscience  needs 
to  be  developed,  there  are  a  few, — I  believe  the 
number  extremely  small, — in  whom  it  is  already 
so  sensitive  that  it  needs  to  be  repressed  or 
regulated ;  they  have  an  exaggerated  fear  of 
wrong-doing ;  they  suffer  intensely  for  slight 
omissions  and  commissions.     A  too  tender  con- 


.28  Child    Culture 

science  is  to  be  deprecated,  for  it  produces  ex- 
cruciating and  unnecessary  suffering.  What 
should  be  cultivated  is  a  healthy  conscience, 
one  that  acts  naturally  and  vigorously,  but  in 
which  there  is  no  taint  of  the  morbid. 

It  is  not  best  to  anticipate  too  much,  and 
overwhelm  the  child  with  precepts.  Let  the 
suggestion  come  with  the  occasion ;  let  the  com- 
mission or  omission  call  forth  the  lesson,  and 
above  all,  let  him  perceive  some  truths  for  him- 
self. No  truths  are  so  precious  to  us  as  those 
we  have  ourselves  perceived;  they  make  the 
deepest  impression  on  our  moral  natures,  and 
are  the  ones  by  which  we  are  most  apt  to  profit. 

Next  to  what  experience  teaches,  the  child  is 
most  impressed  by  the  moral  precepts  which  he 
sees  embodied.  When  he  sees  that  the  mother 
and  father  give  duty  the  precedence  to  pleasure, 
that  they  refuse  to  give  ear  to  vicious  gossip, 
charitably  defend  or  suspend  judgment  against 
the  slandered,  or  when  the  mother  sacrifices  her 
own  convenience  to  minister  to  the  unfortu- 
nate,— do  not  these  living  precepts  speak  more 
eloquently  to  the  child  than  any  sermon  un- 
supported by  example  ? 

There  is  a  claim  that  evil  example  deters, 
disgusts  the  beholder  and  thus  acts  beneficially 
on  the  morals.  The  Spartans  compelled  the 
Helots  to  get  drunk  at  times,  hoping  the  dis- 
gusting sight  would  act  as  a  deterrent  to  the 


The  Moral  Sense  29 

youth  of  the  time.  If  such  contact  is  not  so 
continuous  as  to  harden  the  sensibilities,  this 
method  might  serve  as  a  confirmation  after  the 
moral  sense  has  been  developed,  but  if  the 
child's  moral  convictions  are  dim  or  weak,  it  is 
a  dangerous  experiment. 

Few  persons  seem  to  realize  the  significance 
of  strict  integrity  in  the  small  everyday  affairs 
of  life,  yet  they  are  the  beginnings  from  which, 
step  by  step,  the  moral  sensibilities  are  quick- 
ened or  dulled,  and  perhaps  forever  weakened. 
I  had  some  difficulty  in  impressing  upon  one  of 
my  children,  when  he  first  attended  school,  to 
which  he  went  by  car,  that  if  his  fare  were  not 
collected  he  should  not  retain  it,  but  should 
himself  offer  it  to  the  conductor.  His  is  a  dis- 
honesty to  which  many  children  must  plead 
guilty,  and  often  with  the  parents'  knowledge. 
These  little  opportunities  for  inculcating  un- 
swerving honesty  and  integrity  arise  often  in 
every  household,  and  should  serve  as  occasions 
for  valuable  practical  lessons. 

What  is  the  obstacle  that  obstructs  the  path 
of  morality  and  virtuous  living?  Is  it  not  the 
suffering  entailed  ?  There  is  no  royal  road  to 
virtue  any  more  than  there  is  to  learning. 
Whatever  is  worth  having  in  the  moral  as  well 
as  in  the  material  or  intellectual  world,  must  be 
earned  by  the  sweat  of  the  brow,  else  it  would 
be  possessed  by  all ;  it  is  the  difficulty  of  attain- 


30  Child    Culture 

ment  which  enhances  the  value.  There  is  no 
merit  in  not  doing  what  we  have  no  temptation 
to  do ;  the  merit  is  in  the  temptation  resisted, 
the  weakness  overcome.  The  recluse  who  with- 
draws from  the  world  that  he  may  not  meet 
temptation,  is  not  so  strong  as  he  who  remains 
in  the  world  and  fights  the  devil  out  of  sight. 

It  is  a  great  weakness  in  parents  that  they 
are  not  willing  their  children  should  suffer  in 
the  acquisition  of  moral  rectitude ;  they  seem 
to  think  their  offspring  can  go  through  life 
without  pain.  This  folly  affects  the  child,  and 
does  more  to  weaken  character  than  any  other 
one  influence.  Inspire  the  young  with  courage 
to  bear  for  the  right,  to  expect  to  suffer  incon- 
veniences, and  to  do  so  willingly  as  a  natural 
concomitant  of  virtuous  effort. 

To  submit  to  any  suffering  robs  it  of  half  its 
bitterness.  They  who  earnestly  desire  to 
.  conquer  are  willing  to  endure  all  for  which  the 
conquest  calls.  They  are  the  true  soldiers,  and 
will  find  their  compensation  in  the  victory 
which  cannot  fail  to  be  theirs. 

Not  only  in  the  battle,  but  after  the  unsuc- 
cessful battle,  the  vanquished  must  suffer,  and 
by  suffering  he  will  attain  the  requisite 
strength.  Temptation  calls  forth  the  evil  in 
our  nature  that  we  may  become  conscious  of  it 
and  eradicate  it.  We  may  fall  before  such 
seductions  for  a  time,  but  when  the  avengers, 


The  Moral  Sense  31 

retribution,  remorse  and  repentance  overtake 
us,  they  slay  the  evil  that  is  in  us,  and  after  we 
have  recognized  our  passions  we  should  not 
again  be  misled.  In  the  Purgatoria  the  spirits 
plunge  gladly  into  the  fire,  because  they  know 
it  purges.  Lanier  depicts  Gwendolen's  state 
after  coming  under  Deronda's  influence  as  fol- 
lows : — "  The  possibility  of  making  one's  life  a 
good  life,  not  only  makes  it  worth  living  but 
invests  it  with  a  romantic  interest  whose  depth 
is  infinitely  beyond  that  of  all  the  society  pleas- 
ures which  had  hitherto  formed  her  horizon." 

It  is  not  wise  to  develop  the  child's  moral 
nature  by  specific,  arbitrary  rules.  Teach  him 
EIGHT  THINKING,  and  abovc  all  eight  feeling, 
for  noble  and  high  feeling  not  only  brings  men 
into  the  light  where  they  can  see  well,  but 
keeps  undefiled  that  tabernacle  of  God,  their 
integrity,  which  is  the  one  essential  for  both 
individuals  and  society. 

Religion  is  the  dynamics  of  good  morals. 
Because  we  often  find  good  men  and  women 
who  disclaim  belief  in  the  supernatural  (the  so- 
called  agnostics),  we  may  conclude  that  it  is  a 
non-essential,  that  their  morals  were  of  inde- 
pendent growth.  It  is  a  deception;  they  are 
the  fruit  which  has  fallen  from  the  tree  of  re- 
ligion, and  these  good  men  and  women  do  not 
realize  that  the  fruit  was  ever  attached  to  it. 
Religion  is  a  leaven  that  has  entered  the  world, 


32  Child    Culture 

and  though  the  world  ''kuow  it  not"  and  cast 
it  off,  it  has  done  its  faithful  work  and  will  do 
it  to  the  end  of  time. 

The  child's  faith  will  doubtless  be  that  of  its 
parents,  that  which  came  to  it  by  tradition,  and 
it  matters  little  what  is  the  denomination.  The 
more  deeply  religious  one  is,  the  less  one  cares 
about  sects.  But  I  should  wish  the  child  to  be 
Christian  in  the  best  sense  of  the  word — a  fol- 
lower of  the  spirit  of  Christ — that  spirit  of 
charity,  justice,  compassion  and  self-annihila- 
tion wherein  all  sects  reverence  Him,  and  in 
following  which  none  can  err. 

There  has  been  growing  a  sentiment  that 
children  should  not  be  taught  dogmatically  in 
religious  matters,  but  should  await  their  own 
interpretations  in  mature  life ;  nevertheless, 
parents  should  have  religious  convictions  them- 
selves, and  those  which  after  profound  and 
prayerful  effort  appeal  to  them  as  truest,  should 
be  the  instruction  given  their  children,  at  least 
on  cardinal  subjects  on  which  the  child  must 
receive  enlightenment  from  some  source. 

In  so  far  as  religion  is  a  means  of  obtaining 
soul  culture,  and  not  a  matter  of  theological 
polemics  and  hide-bound  dogma,  it  can  be  and 
is  the  source  of  man's  truest  inspirations ;  the 
preference  should  therefore  be  given  the  denom- 
inations which  hold  character  above  dogma,  the 
spirit  above  the  letter. 


Ill 

HEREDITY  AND  ENVIEONMENT 

Man  is  the  product  of  two  powers ;  first  the 
organic,  with  which  he  is  born ;  second  the  ac- 
quired, which  comes  to  him  by  environment, 
and  by  the  action  and  reaction  of  his  faculties. 
Their  respective  importance  and  value  have 
been  the  subject  of  discussion,  debate  and  in- 
vestigation by  the  leading  scientists  and  philos- 
ophers of  the  day,  some  contending  that  the 
difference  between  men  is  only  a  difference  of 
education ;  others  vindicating  the  claim  of  the 
innate  tendency,  the  preeminence  of  heredity. 
Both  claims  are  exaggerations,  and  a  modifica- 
tion of  each  is  nearer  the  truth.  It  would  be 
utterly  unscientific  to  believe  that  man  does  not 
partake  of  the  characteristics  and  tendencies  of 
his  parents.  In  all  nature  like  begets  like. 
Any  given  species  reproduces  the  same  species, 
the  bacillus  of  cholera  produces  only  cholera 
bacilli  and  that  of  consumption  only  consump- 
tion. In  the  lower  forms  of  animal  and  vegeta- 
ble life  the  protoplasm  is  unaltered  and  trans- 
mitted almost  without  change.  Unlike  the 
creatures  of  the  natural  and  animal  world,  man 
has  intellect  and  soul,  and  is  thereby  endowed 


34  Child    Culture 

with  a  free  will  and  power  to  modify  his  natural 
inheritance. 

The  antimony  which  dominates  the  question 
is  solvable  only  by  experiment  and  experience,' 
and  the  data  of  both  claimants  are  modified  by 
the  results. 

When  it  is  observed  in  the  animal  world  how 
exactly  and  uniformly  one  breed  and  quality 
begets  the  like  breed  and  quality,  it  would  seem 
a  simple  conclusion  that  the  law  of  transmis- 
sion would  be  as  inflexible  in  the  case  of  man. 
It  proves  not  to  be  so  with  higher  organisms ; 
the  higher  the  organism  the  greater  the  differ- 
entiation; in  these  organisms,  only  tendencies, 
not  conditions,  are  transmitted.  The  causes  of 
the  differentiation  are  both  organic  and  ac- 
quired. The  child  has  two  parents,  perhaps  of 
different  physical  types,  the  one  blonde  the 
other  brunette ;  the  child  cannot  possibly  be 
both,  he  must  resemble  the  one  or  the  other,  or 
be  a  modification  of  both.  These  parents  have 
qualities  unlike ;  the  mother  may  be  impulsive, 
the  father  phlegmatic  in  temperament ;  the 
child  can  inherit  only  the  qualities  of  one  par- 
ent, or  be  a  modification  of  the  two,  and 
thereby  produces  a  more  perfect  balance  than 
existed  in  either  parent ;  or  the  two  tendencies 
may  struggle  in  him  always,  sometimes  one, 
sometimes  the  other  prevailing.  In  all  opposing 
tendencies  one  will  dominate  and  the  other  be 


Heredity  and  Environment  35 

subordinate  for  that  generation,  perhaps  for  sev- 
eral to  come,  and  may  then  unexpectedly  reas- 
sert itself.  Any  tendency  that  has  once  de- 
veloped is  never  lost,  but  is  held  in  stock  and 
liable  to  reproduction.  Atavism  goes  back  of 
parents  and  grandparents  to  remote  ancestors, 
and,  though  under  certain  conditions  it  may 
never  manifest  itself,  the  possibility  is  never 
extinct. 

The  point  that  confuses  hereditists  more  than 
any  other  is  the  great  number  of  the  ancestors 
of  every  individual.  Every  man  has  four  grand- 
parents, eight  great  grandparents,  thirty- two 
direct  progenitors  in  the  preceding  generation, 
so  that  going  back  ten  generations  he  finds  him- 
self a  direct  descendant  of  two  thousand  per- 
sons and,  as  these  figures  double  in  each  gener- 
ation, his  ancestry  becomes  almost  coextensive 
with  the  inhabitants  of  the  earth.  To  what  a 
variety  of  tendencies  is  he  therefore  heir,  and 
how  this  multiplicity  reduces  the  danger  of  the 
establishment,  confirmation  and  predominance 
of  any  one  trait.  When  one  reflects  what  a 
composite  creature  he  is,  is  it  any  wonder  that 
a  man  finds  himself  the  victim  of  so  many 
conflicting  thoughts  and  passions, — that  he  is 
sometimes  inconsistent?  His  possibilities  are 
not  only  the  sum  of  all  the  inherited  tendencies 
of  all  his  forefathers,  but  also  include  those  ten- 
dencies acquired  by  each  forefather,  these  also 


36  Child    Culture 

being  represented  in  every  transmission.  Each 
one's  natural  and  inherited  tendencies  are  added 
unto  by  his  environment ;  they  are  either  fos- 
tered and  increased  or  they  are  whipped  back 
and  modified ;  so  that  while  every  man  is  a  prod- 
uct, he  is  also  a  producer  of  tendencies,  and 
the  new  product  has  just  as  fixed  a  quality  as 
its  predecessor.  These  changes  are  wrought  by 
environment  and  are  the  salvation  of  what 
might  otherwise  be  a  hopeless  heritage.  The 
remarkable  feature  of  heredity  is  the  tenacity 
with  which  it  clings  to  what  is  once  conceded 
to  it ;  this  retention  is  its  special  function,  while 
change,  melioration  is  the  function  of  environ- 
ment. If  heredity  is  permitted  to  do  its  worst, 
to  strengthen  the  same  evil  tendencies  gener- 
ation after  generation,  the  weak  traits  uniting 
with  the  weak,  the  depraved  with  the  depraved, 
and  environment  in  no  way  relieves  the  condi- 
tion, then  certain  characteristics  become  in- 
grained, and  it  will  take  generations  of  better 
tendencies  to  undo  the  traits  which  have  become 
so  fixed.  Yet  the  worst  can  be  modified  in  one 
generation  by  union  with  better  qualities  and 
by  a  favorable  environment.  The  hindrance 
to  such  redemption  lies  in  the  solidarity  of  the 
weak,  just  as  the  strength  of  the  virtuous  is  in 
their  solidarity.^ 

*  North  American  Review,  Sept.  1893,     "The  Lesson  of 
Heredity."    By  Henry  S.  Williams. 


Heredity  and  Environment  37 

The  attraction  of  opposite  qualities  in  the 
sexes  helps  to  preserve  the  equilibrium,  for  by 
the  union  of  a  man  and  woman  of  opposite 
characteristics  a  general  balance  is  apt  to  ensue 
in  the  offspring.  The  weakness  of  the  aristoc- 
racy is  in  their  environment;  overindulgence 
weakens,  too  great  license  removes  the  re- 
straints which  fetter  the  less  privileged  class, 
80  that  we  constantly  see  the  high  degenerating, 
and  their  places  filled  by  others  who  have  been 
more  favorably  environed.  However  certain 
one  may  feel  that  he  has  a  goodly  heritage, 
it  should  be  preciously  guarded,  for  who  knows 
the  latent  evil  that  lurks  in  the  rear,  awaiting 
opportunity  to  reassert  itself,  and  every  man 
has  enough  such  tendencies  in  his  composition 
to  prove  his  undoing  if  he  gives  play  to  them. 

Men  and  women  who  take  pleasure  in  hurt- 
ing one  another's  feelings  still  retain  the  in- 
stincts of  the  reptiles  of  ages  ago  that  crawled 
the  earth,  seeking  whom  they  might  sting  or 
stick  their  fangs  into.  All  have  inherent  good 
and  inherent  bad  tendencies ;  man  is  by  his 
conglomerate  ancestry  a  creature  of  great  com- 
plexity. 

A  man  whose  recent  ancestry  has  yielded  to 
its  evil  tendencies  in  any  direction  will  find 
these  currents  in  himself  nearer  the  surface 
and  more  prone  to  assert  themselves;  but  he 
may  have  strong  counter-currents  that  have  lain 


38  Child    Culture 

dormant  and  which  will  react  to  a  changed  en- 
vironment; these  he  can  array  against  his  weak- 
ness and  become  a  stronger  man  than  one  who 
had  no  such  battle  to  fight.  The  man  who 
feels  that  he  can  rest  on  the  laurels  of  his  an- 
cestors, may  become  reckless  or  less  guarded 
and  be  overthrown  ;  the  man  who  is  conscious  of 
a  weak  inheritance  may  be  on  the  alert  against 
the  enemy,  and  on  that  point  unassailable.  The 
necessity  is  that  he  should  feel  his  -own  respon- 
sibility for  himself.  Nothing  thwarts  a  man's 
redemption  so  completely  as  a  sense  of  fatality, 
of  moral  slavery,  of  an  irremedial  heredity, 
which  is  also  unwarranted,  for  in  the  light  of 
scientific  facts  all  have  inherent  possibilities  for 
good.  What  a  source  of  comfort  and  hope  this 
affords  a  man  who  aspires  to  be  better  than  his 
heritage.  In  religion  and  morality  alike,  the 
idea  of  salvation — i,  e.,  health  giving — is  the 
essential  idea.  "  Blood  will  tell," — but  which 
blood?  That  will  be  decided  largely  by  a 
man's  environment.  "  If  virtue  and  morality 
cannot  be  taught,  then  the  whole  moral  obli- 
gation is  void  ;  if  heredity  is  without  remedy, 
social  science  is  paralyzed.'* 

Citations  are  constantly  made  to  prove  the 
strength  of  heredity  ;  many  might  be  made  to 
show  its  irregularities.  Men  of  talent  are 
rarely  sons  of  men  eminent  in  the  same  line,  or 
even  of  men  who  have  evinced  unusual  ability ; 


Heredity  and  Environment  39 

neither  do  we  hear  much  of  the  posterity  of 
genius.  By  the  laws  of  heredity  the  brilliant 
should  beget  the  brilliant,  talent  beget  talent, 
yet  the  fact  is  that  cases  of  marked  ability,  or 
talent,  are  almost  invariably  sporadic. 

By  environment  is  meant  not  only  the  direct, 
intentional  education  which  the  child  receives, 
but  also  every  influence  that  touches  his  life 
after  birth.  Example,  as  has  been  shown  else- 
where, is  one  of  the  greatest  forces  in  develop- 
ing good  tendencies  in  a  child,  as,  more  than 
all  others  it  shows  possibilities  realized.  There 
is  another  force  to  which  psychologists  have 
lately  given  attention, — the  force  of  sugges- 
tion. "  All  perception  is  incipient  suggestion," 
says  Guyau,^  "  which  in  certain  individuals  not 
being  neutralized  by  other  suggestions,  com- 
pletes itself  in  action.^  All  suggestion  becomes 
irresistible  when  perception,  instead  of  being 
produced  in  the  midst  of  complex  states  of  con- 
sciousness which  limit  it,  occupies  the  whole 
consciousness,  and  at  a  given  moment  con- 
stitutes the  whole  inner  being.  This  state  is 
found  in  all  whose  mental  equilibrium  is  made 
more  or  less  unstable  by  a  kind  of  abstraction 
which  suppresses  in  the  mind  one  aspect  of 
reality Thus  suggestion  is  the  trans- 
formation by  which  a  relatively  passive  organ- 
ism tends  to  bring  itself  into  unison  with  a  rel- 
*  L'Education  et  PHereditj. 


40  Child    Culture 

atively  active  organism ;  the  latter  dominates 
the  former,  and  eventually  controls  its  external 
movements  and  inner  beliefs.  Intercourse  with 
respected  masters,  relatives,  or  any  superior 
whatever,  must  produce  suggestions  which  ex- 
tend through  a  child's  life.  Crimes  are  propa- 
gated by  suggestion,  often  in  the  form  in  which 
the  first  was  committed.  The  injury  done  by 
the  Press  in  giving  the  details  of  crimes,  sui- 
cides, etc.,  is  incalculable,  and  shows  the  power 
of  suggestion  for  evil.  Obedience  is  the  effect 
of  successful  suggestion,  and  the  power  of  sug- 
gestion is  reducible  to  the  power  of  assertion. 
Temperaments  most  capable  of  acquiring 
authority  over  men  are  those  which  assert 
most  strongly.  They  who  have  the  strongest 
beliefs,  the  strongest  convictions,  are  the  ones 
who  are  the  most  believed,  who  have  the  most 
authority.  Every  strong  will  tends  to  create 
a  will  in  the  same  direction  in  other  individuals. 
What  one  thinks  with  sufficient  energy,  one 
makes  others  think  and  see  in  the  same  light ; 
the  power  of  affirmation  is  contagious  ;  author- 
ity is  the  centre  from  which  action  is  radiated." 
Children, — on  account  of  their  absence  of 
ideas, — have  the  undeveloped  consciousness  pe- 
culiarly open  to  this  force.  Everything  the 
child  sees  is  a  suggestion  to  it.  Everyone 
knows  the  story  of  the  woman  who,  when  go- 
ing out  one  day,  told  her  children  not  to  put 


Heredity  and  Environment  41 

any  beans  in  their  noses.  The  children  had  no 
thought  of  doing  such  a  thing  previous  to  the 
suggestion,  which,  however,  proved  stronger 
than  their  power  of  obedience,  for,  when  the 
mother  returned  all  the  children  had  beans  up 
their  noses. 

Shakespeare  illustrates  the  power  of  sugges- 
tion in  Macbeth,  when  the  witches  salute  him 
— "All  hail  Macbeth!  hail  to  thee,  thane  of 
Cawdor!"  and,  "That  shalt  be  king  hereafter," 
which  suggestion  led  to  Duncan's  death  and 
the  elevation  of  Macbeth  to  the  throne. 

The  moral  art  of  suggestion  is  the  art  of 
modifying  an  individual  by  making  him  believe 
he  may  be  other  than  he  is.  It  is  one  of  the 
important  means  in  education.  Persuade  a 
child  that  he  has  a  strong  will  in  order  to 
give  him  strength  of  will ;  make  him  feel  that 
he  is  morally  free,  that  he  may  realize  the  idea 
of  moral  liberty.  If  moral  slavery  reduce  him 
to  the  belief  that  he  has  no  strength  to  resist, 
that  he  is  powerless  to  oppose  his  impulse,  he 
yields  without  a  struggle.  One's  faith  in  one's 
ability  to  do  anything  is  half  of  the  achieve- 
ment. The  art  of  managing  the  young,  and 
even  men,  consists  in  assuming  them  to  be  as 
good  as  we  wish  them  to  be,  thus  forcing  on 
them  a  "noblesse  oblige."  Therefore,  in 
education,  always  presuppose  the  existence  of 
goodness  and  goodwill.     All  children  have  bet- 


42  Child    Culture 

ter  intentions  than  their  conduct  indicates.  Ill 
conduct  is  oftener  the  result  of  thoughtless- 
ness, impulse,  overflowing  animal  spirits  than 
of  real  waywardness  or  deliberation. 

It  is  well  to  give  tasks  to  children  because  it 
accustoms  them  to  exert  their  will  power,  and 
in  the  experience  of  winning  success,  they  learn 
their  power  and  thus  acquire  self-confidence. 
The  task  should  never  exceed  the  child's  power, 
however,  but  be  increased  in  proportion  to  his 
strength.  To  task  him  beyond  his  power  is  to 
produce  a  result  diametrically  opposed  to  the 
idea  of  capability  which  one  is  trying  to  instil. 
The  essential  purpose  is  to  create,  by  direct 
suggestion  or  repeated  action,  a  series  of  habits 
capable  of  strengthening  some,  or  of  supplant- 
ing other,  impulses  of  heredity  origin.  Chil- 
dren admire  moral  strength,  and  no  suggestion 
will  appeal  to  them  more  strongly  than  one  ex- 
ercised in  this  direction. 

The  influence  of  good  social  environment  is 
a  power  too  manifest  for  the  partisans  of  hered- 
ity not  to  admit.  The  actions  of  our  ancestors 
prompt  certain  actions  in  us,  and  if  there  is 
nothing  to  correct  the  prompting  we  yield  to 
it.  But,  with  the  solidarity  of  our  social  en- 
vironment favoring  us,  the  original  prompting 
is  continually  disregarded  until  it  is  lost.  The 
child,  by  the  influence  of  example,  of  moral 
suggestion  in  various  forms,  and  of  another  ele- 


Heredity  and  Environment  43 

ment  which  may  be  described  as  the  element  of 
obligation  or  duty — tlie  feeling  that  what  one 
can  do  one  ought  to  do, — disregards  its  first  in- 
clination, and  in  time  establishes  the  habit  of 
resistance.  All  of  these  influences  may  be 
classed  however  as  coming  from  blind  prompt- 
ings or  instinctive  adaptations  to  the  right,  and 
while  they  are  valuable,  they  are  far  less  so 
than  insight,  the  perception  of  right,  the  indi- 
vidual concurrence  of  the  heart  and  mind  in 
divine  law,  which  generates  living  principles. 

Genius  is  born.  Though  much  more  easily 
obtained  by  men  of  righteous  ancestry,  virtue 
can  only  be  the  result  of  individual  effort. 
Who  would  not  wish  to  be  well-born,  both  for 
the  honor  it  confers,  and  because  one's  lot  in 
life  is  thereby  rendered  so  much  easier  ?  If  a 
man  could  choose  his  ancestors  he  would  choose 
only  the  best.  No  man  is  responsible  to  God 
or  to  man  for  his  forefathers  or  his  birth,  but 
every  man  has  some  responsibility  for  his  en- 
vironment, for  his  acquired  qualities,  and  it  is 
his  duty  and  should  be  his  ambition  to  leave 
to  his  progeny  the  best  possible  inheritance, 
and  to  say  with  Napoleon,  "  It  is  I  who  am  the 
ancestor." 

IMany  well-to-do  childless  families  claim  they 
would  adopt  orphan  children  or  foundlings  if 
it  were  not  for  the  danger  of  a  bad  heredity  in 
such  children.     The  majority  of  foundlings  are 


44  Child    Culture 

doubtless  ill  born,  or  at  least  the  offspring  of 
weakness,  but  with  good  environment,  so  many 
have  become  highly  respected  members  of  so- 
ciety and  sources  of  such  infinite  comfort  and 
pleasure  to  the  adopted  parents  that  the  be- 
nevolent should  not  be  discouraged.  Some 
very  excellent  people  have  children  of  their 
own  who  turn  out  most  unfortunately,  but  it 
does  not  follow  because  the  parents  were  good 
and  virtuous  that  they  managed  their  children 
judiciously,  or  made  their  environment  what  it 
should  be.  In  like  manner  some  adopted  chil- 
dren prove  unsatisfactory  by  reason  of  unfavor- 
able environment.  But  any  woman  who  has 
the  moral  fitness  and  can  offer  the  right  en- 
vironmental advantages  to  such  deprived  little 
ones,  can  do  no  greater  charity  than  to  take  to 
her  heart  and  home  one  of  them.  And  after 
all,  when  one's  full  duty  has  been  done,  respon- 
sibility ceases,  and  the  rest  may  be  left  to  God 
who  judges  by  the  effort  and  not  by  the  result. 
It  is  diflBcult  to  draw  the  line  of  demarcation 
between  the  two  great  influences ;  it  is  often 
diflScult  to  state  just  whether  the  development 
is  the  result  of  a  man's  environment  or  of  his 
heredity,  so  that  if  the  influence  of  education 
has  not  been  completely  demonstrated,  it  has 
at  least  been  shown  that  in  countless  cases 
heredity  is  irregular  and  unreliable.  We  can- 
not aid  the  latter  for  ourselves,  so  our  faith  and 


Heredity  and  Environment  45 

our  efforts  must  turn  to  the  former,  endeavor- 
ing to  recover  for  ourselves  and  to  secure  to 
our  posterity  a  heritage  more  precious  than 
wealth. 


IV 

THE  TRAINING   OF  THE   SENSES 

A  BLUB  book  recently  published  in  Great 
Britain  covering  the  criminal  statistics  of  Eng- 
land, Ireland,  and  Wales,  discloses  the  fact  that 
in  those  countries  there  are  more  criminals  be- 
tween the  ages  of  sixteen  and  twenty-one  years 
than  of  any  other  period.  The  United  States 
census  reports  show  a  similar  condition  in  this 
country ;  also,  that  in  proportion  to  the  popula- 
tion the  increase  in  the  number  of  juvenile 
criminals  is  greater  than  of  adult  criminals. 
Between  1880  and  1890  there  was  a  material 
decrease  of  adult  criminals  while  the  number 
of  juvenile  criminals  increased,  and  in  1890 
fully  thirty-five  per  cent,  of  the  criminal  popu- 
lation of  this  country  was  under  twenty-one 
years  of  age. 

Children  who  commit  crime  at  that  tender 
age  are  presumably  neglected  in  their  homes, 
have  come  under  the  influence  of  vice  outside 
when  they  should  have  been  under  judicious 
home  restraint.  Does  not  such  a  condition 
point  to  a  failure  of  parental  duty,  or  to  neglect 
by  the  state  ?  If  the  parent  or  the  state  has  a 
claim  on  the  child  for  obedience  and  service, 
46 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  47 

how  much  more  has  the  child,  an  involuntary 
partner,  a  moral  right  to  be  educated  for  these 
relations  ?  When  we  reflect  what  difficulties 
beset  the  narrow  path  even  with  the  best  en- 
vironment, is  not  the  importance  of  a  more 
careful  guardianship  most  manifest  ? 

While  the  per  cent,  as  shown  by  foregoing 
statistics  was  as  high  as  thirty-five,  the  figures 
show  that  the  increase  in  those  ten  years  had 
only  been  eight  to  the  million  of  population, 
which  is  a  comparatively  meagre  increase,  and 
gives  evidence  of  an  effective  moral  agency  in 
this  country  which  is  encouraging,  and  which 
should  be  an  inducement  for  increased  effort. 

A  century  and  a  half  ago  the  first  powerful 
blow  was  struck  in  behalf  of  a  more  thoughtful 
humane  education  of  the  child,  and  the  assail- 
ant was  that  most  inconsistent  of  men,  the 
superb  scorner,  Jean  Jacques  Rousseau.  He 
was  a  man  of  many  misconceptions  and  posings, 
but  of  at  least  one  brilliant  and  penetrating 
work,  "Emile,  or  Concerning  Education."  Its 
ideas  on  the  natural  training  of  the  child  were 
the  heralding  thoughts  of  our  present  system, 
while  his  ideas  on  the  training  of  women  were 
as  benighted  and  conceited  as  his  others  were 
enlightened.  Richter,  the  most  charming  and 
noble  of  German  authors,  was  a  pupil  of  his,  as 
were  also  Pestalozzi  and  Froebel,  to  whom  we 
owe  the  present  predominance  of  natural  train- 


48  Child    Culture 

ing  during  the  earlier  years  of  childhood.  Un- 
til Froebel's  time  little  thought  was  given  to 
the  training  of  the  infant's  natural  instincts  in 
the  development  of  conduct  and  character.  He 
made  a  scientific  study  of  these  apparently  in- 
significant instincts,  and  in  his  works  "  The 
Science  of  Motherhood  "  and  "  Education  of 
Man,"  etc.,  shows  how  these  instincts  rightly 
understood  are  the  text-books  of  the  child's 
education.  If  parents  understood  the  important 
service  he  has  rendered  childhood  and  mother- 
hood, and  the  value  of  his  ideas  to  the  race,  the 
next  great  monument  erected  in  this  or  any 
other  country  would  be  to  Feiedrich  Froebel. 
If  understood  and  followed  in  every  home  his 
methods  would  reconstitute  human  conduct 
and  character.  Too  few  mothers,  even  of  those 
who  know  of  his  work,  appreciate  that  this 
system  should  not  be  confined  to  the  kindergar- 
ten, but  is  just  as  applicable  in  the  home  and 
should  be  the  study  of  every  woman  who 
wishes  to  educate  her  children  intelligently  and 
unto  their  best  possibilities.  The  principles  un- 
derlying the  kindergarten  are  the  most  enliglit- 
ened  of  modern  educational  ideas ;  and  the  ad- 
vantage of  extending  their  operation  to  the 
child's  home  life  is  in  the  fact,  that  compara- 
tively few  children  have  the  opportunity  of  at- 
tending kindergarten,  that  such  attendance  sel- 
dom extends  beyond  a  period  of  two  years  and 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  49 

then  only  for  three  hours  a  day.  The  value  of 
tlie  kindergarten  work  is  very  great,  but  would 
be  inestimable  if  the  ideas  there  instilled  were 
cherished  and  continued  in  the  home  the  re- 
mainder of  the  day  and  the  remainder  of  the 
educational  years.  My  apprehension  is,  that  in 
many  cases  a  great  deal  is  lost  under  a  home 
influence  wholly  subversive  and  in  a  subsequent 
education,  the  ideas  of  which  are  unrelated  to 
this  experience. 

To  begin  with  the  infant,  (one  should  begin 
with  his  father  or  great  grandfather)  every  child 
has  certain  moral  rights.  It  has  a  right  to  be 
well-born.  Henr}^  Ward  Beecher  said  when 
speaking  once  on  the  subject  of  being  "born 
again  "  that  if  he  could  be  born  right  the  first 
time  he  would  take  his  chance  on  "  the  second." 
Every  child  has  the  right  to  be  born  of  parents 
who  can  provide  him  adequately  with  food, 
clothing,  shelter  and  education ;  every  parent 
should  feel  the  infinite  responsibility  of  parent- 
age. It  is  seldom  considered  by  the  lower 
classes,  and  the  babies  of  the  higher  classes  are 
as  greatly  wronged  in  some  ways  as  are  those 
of  the  poor  in  others.  The  babies  of  the 
wealthy  are  too  often  provided  with  quarters 
in  a  part  of  the  house  distant  from  the  parents 
and  left  to  the  charge  of  ignorant,  indifferent 
hirelings,  and  who  knows  what  these  little 
things  suffer  from  inattention  and  impatience, 


50  Child    Culture 

if  not  absolute  cruelty?  We  cannot  expect 
more  of  a  servant  than  of  a  mother,  and  though 
one  would  think  a  mother  would  never  fail  in 
tenderness  to  her  little  helpless  baby,  we  know 
that  mothers  do  lose  patience  sometimes ;  and 
how  much  oftener  will  the  nurse,  who  has  not 
the  mother  love  to  sustain  her  self-control.  On 
the  streets  everyday  one  hears  children  spoken 
to  by  their  maids  with  a  brutality  that  would 
fire  the  mother's  heart  with  indignation  if  she 
knew  of  it.  While  the  poor  woman's  child  suf- 
fers from  her  ignorance,  the  rich  woman's  child 
suffers  equally  from  the  ignorance  and  indiffer- 
ence of  its  attendaiit.  The  poor  woman  may 
tuck  her  child's  head  under  her  arm  and  shawl 
and  unconsciously  shut  off  every  breath  of  air 
from  it,  almost  suffocating  it ;  the  better  condi- 
tioned child  lies  in  a  baby  carriage  with  its  little 
eyes  exposed  to  a  glaring  sun  that  almost 
blinds  it.  At  both  extremes  we  find  the  igno- 
rance and  the  consequent  suffering.  The 
remedy  for  the  ignorance  in  both  cases  is  en- 
lightenment and  a  closer  attention  on  the 
mother's  part  to  her  child's  welfare.  Unless 
one  can  have  a  patient,  well-trained  nurse 
whose  intelligence,  disposition  and  self-control 
are  beyond  impeachment,  one  should  keep  very 
near  to  the  baby  at  all  times,  even  though  such 
vigilance  entail  great  personal  discomfort  and 
self-sacrifice.      True   motherhood  means    con- 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  51 

tinued  self-sacrifice,  but  a  loving  self-sacrifice 
which  has  its  compensations. 

If  a  child's  first  right  is  to  its  mother,  its  next 
is  that  it  may  be  a  child.  Rousseau  complained 
that  nothing  was  so  misunderstood  as  child- 
hood ;  that  everything  is  done  later  to  teach  a 
man  already  neglected  and  spoiled  in  his  early 
years.  He  says :  ''  Nature  requires  children 
to  be  children  before  they  are  men.  If  we  un- 
dertake to  pervert  this  plan  we  shall  produce 
forward  fruits,  having  neither  ripeness  nor 
taste,  and  certain  soon  to  decay.  We  shall 
have  young  professors  and  old  children."  And 
agaiu — "  When  he  leaves  my  hands  I  acknowl- 
edge that  he  will  be  neither  soldier,  priest  nor 
magistrate ;  he  will  be  first  of  all,  a  man,  all 
that  a  man  ought  to  be,  and  though  fortune 
change,  he  will  be  prepared  for  every  con- 
dition." 

The  extent  of  the  training  in  many  homes 
consists  in  a  series  of  time-honored  "  Don'ts  ;  " 
"Don't  make  a  noise,"  "Don't  put  your 
finger  in  your  nose,"  "  Don't  put  your  hands 
in  your  pockets."  In  many  parents'  eyes, 
the  child  is  a  puppet  which  is  not  to  move 
unless  they  pull  the  string.  He  has  hands 
which  are  to  touch  nothing,  eyes  which  may 
see  but  must  desire  nothing,  feet  that  may  not 
go,  and  a  silent  tongue.  Such  children  exist 
for  the  parents'  sake,  not  for  their  own.     Right 


52  Child    Culture 

education  is  disinterested  and  brings  up  the 
child  for  its  own  sake,  and  for  the  sake  of  its 
race  and  country.  It  should  be  simultaneously 
individual  and  social.  "  Bring  the  most  inten- 
sive individual  existence  into  harmon}^  with  the 
most  extensive  social  life,  and  perfect  harmony 
will  be  found  to  underlie  the  individual  and  the 
collective  existence."  The  science  of  education 
must  harmonize  with  new  conditions  which 
spring  from  new  knowledge.  As  Spencer  re- 
marks, "  The  more  perfect  and  therefore  more 
complex  an  organism  is,  the  more  difficulties 
beset  its  harmonious  development." 

Society  places  no  restraint  on  the  parents' 
absolutism,  except  that  if  they  are  brutal,  the 
*'  Society  for  the  Prevention  of  Cruelty  to 
Children"  steps  in,  removes  the  unworthy 
guardian  and  appoints  another.  Society  does 
nothing  to  parents  who  neglect  their  children, 
who  consciously  or  ignorantly  instil  wrong 
principles  into  them,  who  permit  them  to  de- 
ceive, to  lie,  or  commit  other  manner  of  wrong. 
Was  it  not  Socrates  who  said  that  every  time 
a  youth  offended  against  the  right  he  would 
have  the  parents  of  the  wrong  doer  lashed  for 
the  offence  ? 

We  speak  of  educating  our  children,  do  not 
our  children  educate  us  ?  Does  not  woman  at- 
tain her  best  development,  a  finer  moral  dis- 
cernment, a  truer  judgment,  in  the  management 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  53 

and  education  of  her  children  than  by  any- 
other  experience  that  comes  to  her.  Plato  said 
long  ago :  "  The  best  way  of  training  the 
young  is  to  train  yourself  at  the  same  time ;  not 
to  admonish  them,  but  to  be  always  carrying 
out  your  own  principles  and  practice."  It  is 
certain  that  whatever  we  wish  the  child  to  be, 
we  must  be  that  to  the  child ;  as  a  single  pre- 
cept I  know  of  no  other  that  contains  so  much 
of  efficiency. 

Every  instinct  that  is  manifest  in  the  child 
indicates  a  line  of  development,  and  needs  only 
to  be  trained  and  directed.  The  child  that  an- 
noys a  whole  household  by  his  restlessness,  by 
a  constant  turning  from  one  mischief  to  another, 
is  the  child  who  has  generated  a  superfluity  of 
nervous  force  and  seeks  to  relieve  it  in  needed 
activity.  Instead  of  repressing  this  natural  in- 
stinct, find  it  a  legitimate  outlet ;  it  is  the  in- 
stinct which  is  necessary  to  his  physical  growth 
and  development ;  let  him  go  out,  run  and  play, 
and  change  his  superabundant  vitality  into  in- 
creased muscle,  good  digestion,  thorough  circu- 
lation of  the  blood.  If  he  cannot  go  out,  seek 
in  his  surroundings  something  to  engage  his 
active  mood,  and  Froebel's  system  here  comes 
to  the  rescue  with  alluring  games  and  songs 
which  will  afford  the  mother  an  endless  means 
of  interesting  him,  and  which  establish  a  right 
activity  before  the  wrong  one  can  assert  itself. 


54  Child    Culture 

One  of  these  is  a  set  of  finger  games  for  the 
mother  to  teach  her  baby  while  still  in  arms. 
It  runs  as  follows : 

"This  is  the  mother  good  and  dear, 
This  is  the  father  with  hearty  cheer, 
This  is  the  brother  stout  and  tall, 
This  is  the  sister  who  plays  with  her  doll. 
And  this  is  the  baby,  the  pet  of  all, 
Behold  the  good  family  great  and  small." 

And  as  the  child  personifies  his  fingers  and  re- 
gards them  as  a  small  family  which  he  can  con- 
trol, he  has  something  to  engage  his  thoughts 
and  affectionate  interest.  Again  if  the  mother 
wishes  to  put  the  baby  to  sleep,  instead  of  hav- 
ing a  rebellious  scene,  she  can  suggest  that  the 
little  fingers  are  tired  and  wish  to  sleep,  and  to 
the  accompaniment  of  a  soft  lullaby,  the  baby 
and  the  fingers  fall  asleep  together. 

The  spirit  of  investigation  which  attacks  all 
intelligent  children  and  which  is  the  instinct 
that  leads  to  the  acquirement  of  information 
and  knowledge  can  be  directed  by  giving  them 
playthings  that  are  made  to  take  apart  and  re- 
place ;  for  instance,  blocks,  which  admit  of  such 
a  variety  of  combinations;  and  the  negative 
fault  of  destruction  is  thus  trained  to  the  pos- 
itive one  of  construction.  Before  the  child 
turns  in  any  wrong  direction  supply  him  with 
positive  activities  in  the  right  direction.     This 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  5j; 

positive  upbuilding  principle  is  Froebel's  sys- 
tem, and  it  is  beautifully  elucidated  and  illus- 
trated from  her  experience  in  Elizabeth  Harri- 
son's "  Study  of  Child  Nature."  The  old  method 
was  to  DESTROY  the  wrong,  the  new  method  is  to 
PREVENT  it.  "  What  avails  it  to  drive  out  the 
devil,  sweep  and  garnish  the  house  and  leave  it 
empty,  if  the  act  only  invites  seven  other  de- 
mons to  come  in  and  inhabit  it."  Every  fault 
is  the  lack  of  some  virtue  and  the  right  educa- 
tion prevents  such  defects  by  leading  in  the 
positive  right  element  as  a  first  inhabitant ;  and 
then  there  are  no  dirty,  slovenly  tenants  to 
clean  up  after.  Begin  by  building  the  wall 
where  it  is  weakest.  By  knowing  her  child 
thoroughly  and  studying  his  tendencies  the 
mother  can  soon  discover  the  points  that  need 
propping  and  strengthening. 

Froebel's  method  also  includes  the  training 
of  the  senses,  so  as  to  give  the  child  complete 
control  of  the  lower  senses  which  are  organic, 
and  the  higher  ones  which  establish  the  child's 
communication  with  the  outer  world.  The 
gratification  of  physical  appetite  should  be  sub- 
ordinated to  rational  ends,  giving  us  Emerson's 
idea  of  *' plain  living  and  high  thinking."  The 
control  of  his  appetite  is  to  be  effected  by  cul- 
tivating the  child's  taste  for  wholesome  food 
and  for  that  kind  alone.  When  he  is  old 
enough  to  understand,  it  can  be  explained  to 


56  Child    Culture 

him  that  certain  foods  are  required  to  nourish 
the  body,  that  such  foods  make  good  blood,  and 
good  blood  makes  strong  muscle,  so  if  he  wishes 
to  be  strong  he  must  confine  himself  to  whole- 
some food.  This  promise  of  strength  is  very 
appealing  to  little  boys.  An  appeal  to  the 
child's  reason  sometimes  produces  unexpectedly 
fruitful  results,  and  an  artificial  appetite  can  be 
discouraged  as  easily  as  it  can  be  created.  The 
undue  gratification  of  the  senses  leads  to  over- 
indulgence, and  this  again  to  gluttony  and  sen- 
suality. A  child's  appetite  in  its  original  nor- 
mal state  can  be  retained  if  the  proper  measures 
are  adopted  from  the  beginning.  In  vicious 
feeding  is  sown  the  seed  of  that  most  terrible 
of  woes,  intemperance,  for  they  are  one  and  tlie 
same  in  principle — excessive  stimulation  of  the 
appetite,  false  food  engendering  false  appetites. 
Froebel  appreciated  this  danger,  and  in  his 
"  Education  of  Man  '*  says  :  "  In  the  early 
years  the  child's  food  is  a  matter  of  very  great 
importance ;  not  only  may  tlie  child  by  this 
means  be  made  indolent  or  active,  sluggish  or 
mobile,  dull  or  bright,  inert  or  vigorous,  but 
indeed  for  his  entire  life.  Impressions,  inclina- 
tions, appetites,  which  the  child  may  have  de- 
rived from  his  food,  the  turn  it  may  have  given 
to  his  senses,  and  even  to  his  life  as  a  whole, 
can  only  with  difficulty  be  set  aside,  even  when 
the  age  of  self-dependence  has  been  reached; 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  57 

they  are  one  with  his  whole  physical  life,  and 
therefore  intimately  connected  with  his  spiritual 
life.'*  And  again — "  Parents  and  nurses  should 
ever  remember,  as  underlying  every  precept  in 
this  direction,  the  following  general  principle : 
That  simplicity  and  frugality  in  food  and  in 
other  physical  needs  during  the  years  of  child- 
hood enhance  man's  power  of  attaining  happi- 
ness and  vigor, — true  creativeness  in  every  re- 
spect. Who  has  not  noticed  in  children  over- 
stimulated  by  spices  and  excess  of  food,  appe- 
tites of  a  very  low  order,  from  which  they  can 
never  again  be  free — appetites  which  even  when 
they  seem  to  have  been  suppressed,  only  slum- 
ber and  in  times  of  opportunity  reappear,  to  rob 
man  of  all  his  dignity,  and  to  force  him  away 
from  his  duty.  It  is  far  easier  than  we  think  to 
promote  and  establish  the  welfare  of  mankind, 
and  here  it  is  easy  to  avoid  the  wrong  and  to  find 
the  right.  Always  let  the  food  be  simply  for 
nourishment,  never  more,  never  less.  Never 
should  it  be  taken  for  its  own  sake,  but  for  the 
sake  of  promoting  bodily  and  mental  activity. 
Still  less  should  the  peculiarities  of  food,  its 
taste  or  delicacy,  ever  become  an  object,  but 
only  a  means  to  make  it  good,  pure,  wholesome 
nourishment.  Let  the  food  of  the  little  child 
be  as  simple  as  the  circumstances  in  which  the 
child  lives  can  afford,  and  let  it  be  in  propor- 
tion to  his  bodily  and  mental  activities." 


58  Child    Culture 

111  the  motto  of  the  "  Fasting  Song  "  Froebel 
says  to  the  mother : 

"Even  through  the  senses  Nature  woos  thy  child, 
Thou  canst  help  him  comprehend  her  lessons  mild;  " 

He  means  that  nature  strives  to  educate  your 
child  spiritually.  His  convictions  are  :  "  That 
the  soul,  the  Divine  element  in  each  child  is  as 
it  were  sealed  up  when  he  first  comes  into  the 
world,  and  is  gradually  awakened  and  strength- 
ened by  the  impressions  which  come  to  him 
through  the  senses  from  the  outside  world;  that 
the  physical  and  spiritual  growth  of  the  child 
go  forward  simultaneously,  but  the  one  by 
means  of  the  other."  The  selfish  side  of  amuse- 
ments, of  dress,  of  the  body,  should  be  relegated 
to  the  background,  and  the  inner  motives  lead- 
ing to  the  higher  spiritual  side  of  character 
brought  forward.  Commend  the  child  more 
for  beautiful  conduct,  for  kind  thought,  for 
moral  efforts,  than  for  the  brightness  of  his 
eyes,  the  beauty  of  his  hair  or  any  physical  su- 
periority. If  parents  place  appearances  above 
meritorious  action  the  child  will  make  the  same 
untrue  discrimination  ;  the  spirit  of  the  parent 
possesses  the  child,  and  the  waters  must  first 
be  purified  at  their  source  before  they  can 
throw  out  crystal  clear  streams  for  the  child's 
delectation.     As  Emerson  says  of  man,  so  of 


The  Training  of  the  Senses  59 

the  child,  he  "  cannot  hear  what  you  say,  what 
you  are  roars  so  in  (my)  his  ears." 

By  such  elevated  guidance  the  child  will  not, 
as  he  matures,  place  his  highest  hopes  on  mate- 
rial things.  He  whose  reliance  for  happiness 
is  based  on  externals  is  doomed  to  disappoint- 
ment ;  it  is  only  in  the  higher  life  of  the  spirit 
that  man  can  find  a  trustworthy  anchorage.  It 
is  the  final  view  to  which  all  human  experience 
and  that  mirror  of  human  life,  the  best  litera- 
ture brings  us,  that  in  self  and  selfish  ends  man 
need  not  look  for  happiness — that  only  outside 
of  self  can  it  be  found.  Man  cannot  know  the 
supreme  moment  until  he 

"Takes  up  the  harp  of  life,  and  smites  on  all  its  chords 

with  might. 
Smites  the  chord  of  Self,  that  trembling,  passes  in  music 

out  of  sight," 


THE  TRAINING  OF  THE  WILL 

The  child's  will  shows  itself  very  early  in 
life  in  the  strength  with  which  it  is  attracted 
to  some  object,  and  the  effort  it  makes  to  secure 
that  object.  It  cries  and  struggles  with  Lao- 
coon  desperation  in  its  determination  to  have 
its  will,  and  the  desire  is  usually  granted  by 
the  parents,  because  to  yield  to  the  child's  wish 
is  the  easiest  way.  Self-will  is  indulged  until 
it  has  obtained  a  healthy  growth,  when  the 
mother  concludes  that  it  must  be  broken,  and 
then  a  conflict  ensues  which  is  as  harmful  and 
as  injudicious  as  the  first  course.  Before  the 
child's  reasoning  faculties  are  sufficiently  de- 
veloped to  be  appealed  to,  before  it  is  old 
enough  to  be  moved  in  its  sympathies  to  the 
right,  it  can  only  be  taught  to  submit  its  will. 
If  articles  which  it  should  not  have  are  invaria- 
bly withheld,  and  certain  ones  which  it  may 
have  always  granted,  it  soon  learns  to  distin- 
guish between  them  and  to  coincide  in  the 
regulation  ;  on  the  other  hand,  a  series  of  most 
disastrous  scenes  follow  the  irregularity  which 
sometimes  cedes,  sometimes  refuses,  the  same 
article.     By  being  consistent,  the  mother  not 


The  Training  of  the  Will  6l 

only  commands  submission  at  the  time,  but 
also  a  habit  of  obedience,  which  is  the  first  and 
most  essential  lesson  in  the  child's  curriculum. 

Good  sense  on  the  mother's  part  is  most  nec- 
essary in  training  the  child  to  obedience,  while 
disobedience  is  often  incited  by  arbitrary  and 
unnecessary  exactions.  There  should  be  few 
requirements,  only  such  as  are  for  the  baby's 
own  sake  and  they  should  be  invariable.  Never 
exact  of  him  more  than  he  is  yet  able  to  give, 
and  if  a  baby  does  not  relish  kisses,  which  are 
not  necessary  to  his  moral,  mental  or  physical 
development,  do  not  torment  and  compel  him 
to  accept  them.  By  making  the  exactions  com- 
mensurate with  his  strength  he  will  grow  in 
power,  and  in  time  respond  to  the  larger  de- 
mands on  his  obedience.  He  should  be  per- 
mitted all  the  freedom  of  will  that  is  consistent 
with  reason  and  convenience,  and  this  method 
united  with  a  wise  direction  of  his  activities 
will  furnish  safeguards  against  those  rebellions 
which  are  so  detrimental  to  a  child's  character. 

Rousseau  says :  "  When  the  infant  cries,  it 
is  from  discomfort.  It  is  unable  to  help  itself 
in  the  least,  and  can  only  express  its  sensation 
of  pain  by  cries,  which  are  calls  for  aid.  Instead 
of  rocking,  or  tossing,  or  scolding  it,  ascertain 
the  cause  of  the  uneasiness  and  relieve  it.  If 
the  cause  cannot  be  found,  it  is  useless  to  try 
to  console  it  by  means  unsuited  to  the  source 


62  Child    Culture 

of  its  discomfort.  At  first,  in  its  weakness,  it 
implores  needful  aid,  which  should  be  accorded ; 
but  by  injudicious  responses  to  its  prayers,  the 
latter  are  converted  into  commands.  The 
baby's  commands  should  not  be  heeded;  his 
physical  comforts  should  be  diligently  attended 
to,  but  he  should  not  be  permitted  to  command 
people,  for  he  is  not  their  master.  He  soon 
looks  on  those  around  him  as  instruments,  which 
he  is  to  keep  in  motion,  to  use  for  securing 
every  capricious  desire ;  he  thus  becomes  tyran- 
nical, perverse  and  imperious,  and  the  parents 
have  themselves  created  this  spirit  of  domina- 
tion by  unwise  administration.  In  helping  him, 
we  must  confine  ourselves  to  what  is  really  of 
use  to  him,  yielding  nothing  to  his  whims  or 
unreasonable  wishes.  Such  caprice  is  unnec- 
essary, contributes  nothing  to  his  happiness, 
and  will  not  be  manifest  except  as  we  create  it. 
Give  the  child  more  personal  freedom,  and  less 
authority ;  let  him  do  more  for  himself  and 
exact  less  of  others.  He  will  thus  become  ac- 
customed to  desire  only  what  he  can  obtain  for 
himself,  and  will  feel  less  keenly  the  want  of 
what  is  not  within  his  power. 

"  If  the  child  is  petted  or  coaxed  when  he 
cries,  he  is  educated  to  cry.  If  you*  cannot 
relieve  a  real  discomfort,  do  nothing ;  do  not 
try  to  soothe  him  by  petting  him.  Your  ca- 
resses cannot  relieve  his  pain,  but  he  will  re- 


The  Training  of  the  Will  63 

member  what  is  necessary  to  do  to  be  humored, 
and  when  be  discovers  that  he  can,  at  will,  en- 
gage your  solicitous  attention,  he  is  your  master. 
If  we  show  indifference  to  his  crying,  if  we 
take  no  pains  to  hush  it,  he  will,  receiving  no 
satisfaction,  discontinue  the  practice.  Antici- 
pate his  needs  and  do  not  wait  for  him  to  notify 
you  by  crying,  which  begets  the  habit;  but  do 
not  evince  much  uneasiness  and  distress  at  his 
tears,  for  when  he  finds  that  they  have  power 
to  move,  he  will  be  very  lavish  of  them.  By 
disregarding  unreasonable  crying  the  habit  is 
prevented,  and  if  it  already  exists,  can  be 
cured." 

Judicious  and  consistent  management  are, 
however,  only  the  outer  breastworks  which  pro- 
tect the  inner  stronghold  for  a  period,  and  to  a 
certain  extent.  Neither  love  nor  wisdom  can 
construct  a  fortification  strong  enough  to  keep 
away  temptation,  and  the  outward,  formal,  obe- 
dience must  be  gradually  trained  to  become  a 
voluntary  conformity — the  will  power  must  be 
strengthened  by  an  enlightened  insight.  Will 
or  determination  is  a  valuable  quality  to  possess 
because  it  is  the  carrying  power,  the  executive 
force  of  the  other  faculties.  It  constitutes  the 
backbone  of  all  virtue  and  is  indispensable  to 
a  perfect  development.  The  parent  is  so  desir- 
ous of  having  the  right  thing  done  that  he 
pompels  the  child  to  obey,  although  his  will 


64  Child    Culture 

power  is  not  strengthened  by  such  compulsory 
yielding  to  the  parent's  will.  To  become  the 
strong  faculty  it  should  be,  it  must  be  exercised, 
must  proceed  from  within.  This  training  of 
the  will  takes  time  and  is  a  slow  evolution.  In 
the  meantime,  obedience  must  not  wait  on  this 
training,  but  must  be  required,  and  the  child 
must  not  be  permitted  to  yield  to  his  caprices 
or  humors  while  his  impulses  are  strong  and  his 
reason  feeble.  The  rational  judgment  of  the 
mother  must  prevail  until  the  child's  will  is 
sufficiently  grown  in  the  right  direction.  And 
right  here  we  have  the  most  difficult  problem 
in  the  entire  education  of  the  child — how  to 
compel  obedience  which  it  were  unwise  not  to 
do,  and  at  the  same  time  give  the  child's  will 
opportunity  to  develop  itself  spontaneously, 
into  voluntary  obedience.  This  training  can  be 
assisted  in  two  ways :  by  appeals  to  his  reason, 
and  by  appeals  to  his  sympathy  with  the  right. 
The  law  by  which  the  will  power  is  developed 
is  the  law  of  recognition. 

The  child's  will  may  be  directed  toward  the 
right  by  various  incentives :  one  of  the  most 
powerful  is  the  appeal  to  the  opinion  of  some 
individual  whom  he  respects,  or  to  public  opin- 
ion. If  the  response  to  this  appeal  proceed 
from  a  real  reverence  for  the  better  judgment 
of  the  most  worthy  people,  and  if  he  respect  it 
for   its  soundness,  then  the   recognition  is  a 


The  Training  of  the  Will  65 

worthy  one.  If  on  the  contrary  the  response 
simply  show  a  desire  for  approbation  regardless 
of  the  value  of  the  praise,  then  it  is  vanity  and 
an  unworthy  motive.  The  mother  has  also  the 
instruments  of  her  own  praise  and  censure  with 
which  to  move  the  child's  will.  Praise  and 
censure  are  joint  powers,  and  he  who  cannot 
praise  deservedly  cannot  censure  justly,  for  he 
lacks  the  brighter  half  of  justice.  Right-will 
and  love  are  both  engendered  by  judicious 
praise  of  meritorious  effort,  and  it  is  a  commend- 
able power.  If  the  mother  is  consistent  in 
her  standard,  always  commending  every  effort 
toward  it,  and  censuring  every  deviation  from 
it,  this  standard  will  become  the  child's  ideal 
and  inspire  his  will.  The  foregoing  motives  and 
the  child's  natural  affection  for  his  parents  will 
aid  him  as  much  as  external  motive  can  in  a 
determination  toward  the  right,  and  if  at  the 
same  time  his  insight  is  awakened  whereby  he 
sees  into  the  justice  and  wisdom  of  divine  law, 
— then,  when  he  gains  a  reverence  for  the 
eternal  right  as  such,  he  has  made  all  the  intel- 
lectual and  moral  recognition  a  man  can. 

There  is  also  the  recognition  of  the  heart 
which  moves  the  child  to  feel  toward  the  right. 
This  recognition  maybe  urged  by  relating  stories 
or  facts,  whereiu  true,  generous,  noble  deeds 
are  presented  in  such  attractive  forms  that  the 
child  at  once  desires  to  follow  them.     Ideals 


66  Child    Culture 

are  created  in  the  depths  of  intellectual  ab- 
straction or  emotional  enthusiasm,  and  to 
arouse  the  enthusiasm  by  citing  illustrative  fact 
or  fiction,  gives  the  child  an  ideal  toward 
which  he  may  strive.  Froebel's  games  are  full 
of  such  attractive  ideals,  which  appeal  to  the 
child's  heart.  When  the  child  is  old  enough  to 
understand  heroic  deeds  of  history,  or  the 
imaginary  heroes  of  myth  and  legend,  point 
out  to  him  the  traits  which  ennobled  each,  and 
also  the  statues  which  commemorate  the  vir- 
tuous dead,  that  he  may  appreciate  wherein 
true  greatness  consists,  £ftid  cherish  only  worthy 
ideals.  Miss  Harrison  says  in  this  regard: 
*'  Where  we  see  little  Arabs  of  our  large  cities, 
ragged,  dirty  and  hungry,  smoking  cigarettes 
or  cigars  with  a  triumphant  air  of  having  at- 
tained a  much  envied  distinction,  we  know  that 
their  standard  of  manhood  is  measured  by  the 
length  of  the  cigar  or  size  of  the  pipe  which  a 
man  can  smoke.  We  know  that  high  ideals 
have  never  been  given  to  their  little  souls,  and 
that  they  have  reached  out  for  some  standard 
by  which  to  measure  their  growing  manliness, 
and  have  taken  this  external  distinction  as  the 
test." 

A  child  may  be  perfectly  obedient,  never 
transgress  a  law,  and  yet  have  no  power  of 
self-government,  for  his  controlling  force  may 
be  fear  instead  of  desire,  and  only  when  the 


The  Training  of  the  Will  © 

false  pressure  is  raised  and  his  acts  are  volun- 
tary, can  one  know  what  his  own  power  is. 
Sustain  the  child's  efforts  at  self-control  by  a 
lavish  affection,  letting  this  affection  be  a  re- 
ward for  his  conduct,  and  let  encouragement 
always  come  before  despondency  sets  in,  for 
only  Titanic  strength  of  character  can  endure 
against  constant  discouragement  and  failure. 

We  make  the  great  mistake  of  expecting  too 
much  of  our  children.  Beware  of  hothouse 
morality.  The  detrimental  results  of  intel- 
lectual precocity  are  already  apparent.  The 
moral  faculties  evolve  slowly,  and  over-stimu- 
lation will  have  reaction.  A  boy  of  eight  or 
ten  years;  who  never  transgresses,  never  needs 
correction,  is  lacking  in  physical  or  mental  vi- 
tality. 

The  spirit  of  analysis,  or  reasoning  about  the 
parent's  orders  should  be  discouraged.  It  is 
sometimes  kind  and  wise  of  the  parent  in  re- 
fusing a  request  to  give  a  reason  for  so  doing, 
and  it  would  be  commendable  if  it  did  not  in- 
vite an  argument,  thereby  lessening  the  child's 
respect  for  parental  authority.  There  ought  to 
be  associated  with  the  child's  affection  a  per- 
fect confidence  in  the  parent's  good  judgment. 
"  It  cannot,  however,  be  wondered  at  in  this 
age  of  independent  criticism,"  says  Kate  Doug- 
las Wiggin,  "  when  the  ubiquitous  interro- 
gation point  is  levelled  against  everything,  that 


ii 


68  Child    Culture 

it  should  also  be  held  against  parental  judgment. 
Freedom  of  thought  and  speech  are  republican 
virtues.  If  they  sometimes  prove  its  vices  also 
we  must  bear  them  as  patiently  as  possible  "  ; 
but  with  children  it  might  be  insisted  tliat 
sometimes  their  interest  blinds  their  insight, 
and  they  must  trust  their  parents'  love  and 
have  faith  in  the  rationality  of  their  conclu- 
sions. 

Of  all  errors  in  education  the  worst  is  incon- 
sistency, and  an  immense  increase  of  trans- 
gression results  from  an  irregular  application 
of  rules.  If  a  child  is  sent  from  the  table  nine 
times  for  personal  untidiness  and  permitted  to 
remain  the  tenth  time,  he  is  by  the  one  over- 
sight encouraged  to  persist  in  the  offence.  "  A 
weak  mother,"  says  Spencer,  "  who  perpetually 
threatens  and  never  performs — who  makes 
rules  in  haste  and  repents  them  at  leisure — who 
treats  the  same  offence  now  with  severity  and 
now  with  leniency,  as  the  passing  hour  dictates, 
is  laying  up  misery  for  herself  and  her  children. 
She  is  making  herself  contemptible  in  their 
eyes.  Better  even  a  barbarous  form  of  govern- 
ment, carried  out  consistently,  than  a  humane 
one  inconsistently  carried  out."  Some  parents' 
orders  remind  one  of  the  harlequin  who  ap- 
peared on  the  stage  with  a  bundle  of  papers 
under  each  arm,  and  who  answered,  when  asked 
what  was  under  his  right  arm, — "  Orders,"  and 


The  Training  of  the  Will  69 

when  asked  what  was  under  his  left  arm, — • 
"  Counter-orders." 

Parents  should  be  well  assured  of  the  justice 
and  wisdom  of  their  regulations  and  then  ad- 
here to  them ;  if,  however,  on  further  con- 
sideration their  views  are  modified,  or  changed, 
there  is  no  reason  why  the  child  should  not 
have  the  benefit  of  the  better  judgment.  Ob- 
stinacy in  clinging  to  a  mistaken  judgment  is 
firmness  perverted. 

Weak  will  is  the  ruin  of  as  many  souls  as  de- 
liberate evil,  and  is  often  the  road  to  it.  The 
prisons,  jails  and  reformatories  are  full  of  well- 
meaning  men  who  are  there,  not  because  they 
are  wicked,  but  because  they  are  weak.  There 
are  few  persons  who  would  not  choose  to  do 
right  if  choosing  accomplished  it,  but  they  lack 
the  moral  courage  to  resist  the  temptation  at 
first,  and  the  oftener  they  yield,  the  more  in- 
sensible to  the  wrong  are  they  likely  to  become. 

When  we  begin  to  compromise  we  begin  to 
die,  and  the  child  has  learned  the  most  valuable 
lesson  of  his  life  when  he  appreciates  the  ad- 
vantage of  not  giving  entrance  or  consideration 
to  the  thought  that  can  lead  him  astray.  The 
longer  one  contemplates  the  temptation,  the 
more  irresistible  it  becomes.  The  parents 
should  give  the  child  every  aid  in  its  efforts  at 
self-control.  He  may  desire  the  right  course 
very  earnestly  and  have  no  practical  ideas  of 


70  Child    Culture 

how  to  attain  it,  bis  feelings  overcoming  his  will 
constantly.  This  is  a  frequent  difficulty  with 
intense  natures,  and  on  investigation  it  may  be 
found  that  the  weakness  consists  in  letting  the 
mind  dwell  on  the  luring  thought,  and  that  to 
banish  it  as  often  as  it  presents  itself  is  the  only 
hope  of  success.  The  best  aid  in  a  struggle 
against  temptation  is  to  make  the  child  capable 
of  filling  his  mind  with  other  thoughts  unre- 
lated to  the  tempting  one. 

The  man  who  holds  up  his  head  firmly  and 
securely  through  a  period  of  poverty  or  unde- 
served disgrace  is  exercising  his  power  of  firm- 
ness as  vigorously  as  the  general  on  the  battle- 
field, and  his  conflict  with  his  shaken  self- 
esteem  and  baffled  hopes  is  as  great  as  the  con- 
flict with  the  enemy.  Such  a  man  will  have 
the  sympathy  of  all  right-minded  people. 

No  one  can  guide  and  train  a  little  one  to  his 
best  possibilities  who  has  not  by  love  and  right 
living  retained  his  own  child  heart ;  he  must 
become  as  one  of  them  before  he  can  wisely 
direct  the  life  of  a  little  child.  Yet  these  little 
ones  are  subjected  very  often  to  cruelties  and 
humiliations  which  are  never  intended,  but  are 
the  result  of  thoughtlessness  and  carelessness. 
What  can  we  think  of  a  woman  who  nicknames 
her  daughter,  because  she  is  a  girl  of  slender 
proportions,  "  Slim."  I  once  knew  such  a  one. 
It  is  no  rare  thing  to  hear  mothers  tease  and 


The  Training  of  the  Will  71 

joke,  and,  I  regret  to  say,  even  scold  their  little 
children  about  some  physical  peculiarity  which 
can  be  in  no  way  remedied,  and  of  which  they 
thus  become  painfully  conscious.  Such  words 
are  as  cruel  as  the  taunt  which  made  Byron's 
mother  so  famous. 

Again,  parents  after  punishing  a  child  for  a 
misdemeanor  will  relate  it  to  others  in  the 
child's  presence  and  laugh  at  the  naughtiness 
which  they  a  short  time  before  severely  re- 
buked. Fathers  are  prone  to  regale  their  fam- 
ilies with  certain  transgressions  of  their  boy- 
hood, with  great  relish  for  the  heroic  parts  they 
took.  These  tales,  though  likely  to  prove  very 
tempting  to  the  son,  are,  however,  supposed  to 
excite  no  parallel  propensities  in  him.  All  these 
things  are  done  without  thought  of  the  disas- 
trous effect  they  may  have  on  the  child,  and 
only  serve  to  show  how  guarded  parents  should 
be  before  their  children. 

Inconsistency  is  quite  as  frequent  as  thought- 
lessness, though  the  following  may  be  an  ex- 
treme case.  A  child  presented  himself  at  school 
so  often  in  so  soiled  a  state  that  the  teacher 
remonstrated  with  him,  requesting  him  to  in- 
vite his  mother's  inspection  before  leaving 
home  in  the  morning.  The  little  fellow  re- 
plied :  "  My  mother  has  no  time  for  such 
things.  She  is  writing  a  book  on  *  How  to 
Rear  a  Perfect  Child.'  " 


72  Child    Culture 

It  is  also  unwise  to  reprimand  a  child  before 
others,  as  the  hurt  his  pride  sustains  neutral- 
izes any  effect  the  words  might  otherwise  have  ; 
a  child's  self-respect  should  be  marred  as  seldom 
as  possible,  and  always  reinstated  as  soon  after 
as  possible.  Self-respect  is  a  motive  so  strong, 
that  it  alone  is  often  sufficient  to  hold  to  the 
path  of  rectitude.  When  the  child  is  old 
enough  to  understand,  if  the  parent  will  trace 
back  to  its  source  the  fault  to  which  he  seems 
most  predisposed  and  analyze  his  weak  point 
for  him,  the  analysis  will  be  of  great  assistance 
to  him  in  overcoming  the  fault. 

It  is  wise  sometimes  to  overlook  small  faults, 
particularly  if  one  has  occasion  already  for 
much  reproof,  as  too  frequent  censure  lessens 
the  child's  sensibilities  thereto ;  the  entire  in- 
fluence should  be  levelled  against  the  graver 
defects,  and  when  they  have  been  corrected, 
attention  may  be  given  to  the  lesser  ones.  Her- 
bert Spencer's  theory  of  discipline  is  most  wisely 
suggestive  of  the  course  to  pursue.  He  says  : 
"  Let  the  history  of  your  domestic  rule  typify 
in  little  the  history  of  our  political  rule ;  at  the 
outset  autocratic  control  where  control  is  really 
needful;  by  and  by  an  incipient  constitution- 
alism, in  which  the  liberty  of  the  subject  gains 
some  express  recognition ;  successive  exten- 
sion of  this  liberty  of  the  subject  gradually 
ending    in    parental    abdication."      The    best 


The  Training  of  the  Will  73 

teacher  is  one  who  guides  rather  than  governs, 
suggests  rather  than  dogmatizes,  and  who  in- 
spires the  listener  with  a  desire  to  teach  him- 
self, for  after  all  is  said  and  done,  a  man  must 
make  himself.  He  can  be  assisted  and  devel- 
oped to  a  given  point  only,  and  beyond  that 
his  inspiration  must  emanate  from  himself. 


VI 

PUNISHMENT  AND  EEWAED 

Long  before  the  child's  will  has  developed 
sufficiently  to  wisely  direct  and  sustain  him  in 
good  conduct,  it  is  necessary  that  he  should 
conform  to  some  authority,  as  obedience  and 
right  doing  cannot  wait  on  the  full  growth  of 
the  will.  If  the  child,  however,  rebels  or  disre- 
gards this  authority  as  well  as  his  sense  of 
right,  and  can  by  no  appeal  to  his  reason  or 
sympathy  be  urged  to  comply,  how  shall  the 
parental  authority  be  exercised  ? 

Obedience  may  be  urged  by  four  different 
motives:  First,  Affection.  Second,  Insight, — 
the  recognition  of  right,  moral  respect.  Third, 
The  Habit  of  Submission.  Fourth,  Fear.  Af- 
fection and  recognition  of  right  are  the  highest 
motives. 

It  must  now  be  ascertained  to  what  extent  it 
is  right  to  let  the  elements  of  hope  and  fear 
enter  into  the  child's  discipline.  Much  of  the 
mismanagement  of  children  is  due  to  a  mis- 
apprehension of  the  aim  of  punishment.  Pun- 
ishment is  not  only  an  atonement  for  trans- 
gression, but  should  be  so  directly  a  conse- 
quence of  it,  as  to  fix  in  the  child's  mind  the 
74 


Punishment  and  Reward  75 

relation  between  them — the  act  and  its  conse- 
quence,— and  thereby  aid  him  in  avoiding  a 
repetition  of  both.  He  must  first  know  definitely 
what  is  right  and  what  is  wrong,  and  have  the 
power  of  choosing  between  the  two.  It  is  very 
difficult  to  ascertain  in  a  young  child  how  far 
his  consciousness  is  developed  ;  childhood  is  so 
very  unconscious.  His  attitude  after  the  com- 
mission of  a  deed  may  reveal  the  degree  of  his 
conscious  guilt.  In  doubtful  cases  he  should 
be  given  the  benefit  of  the  doubt ;  in  cases  that 
show  conclusively  both  consciousness  and  de- 
liberate evil,  or  wilfulness,  he  should  learn  that 
"the  way  of  the  transgressor  is  hard."  The 
very  best  punishments  are  those  which  can  be 
linked  with  the  misdeed — the  retributive  pun- 
ishments. They  appeal  to  his  sense  of  justice, 
are  more  impersonal  in  that  they  do  not  afford 
special  indulgence  to  parental  displeasure,  and 
appear  to  him  as  the  direct  consequence  of  his 
deed.  For  instance  :  if  the  child  has  been  given 
a  distinct  task  and  has  shirked  it,  and  afterward 
an  opportunity  for  pleasure  arises,  he  should 
not  be  allowed  to  take  part,  because  the  en- 
forced task  still  awaits  his  attention.  He  must 
recognize  that  the  omission  of  his  duty  brought 
the  unpleasant  result.  It  is  the  law  of  cause 
and  effect, — as  a  man  sows,  so  will  he  reap. 

A  series  of  such  disagreeable  consequences 
will  impress  him  with  the  inevitableness  of  the 


76  Child    Culture 

relation,  unless  the  weak  parent  intervenes  and, 
by  permitting  him  to  forego  the  after  effects, 
spoils  the  lesson,  or  punishes  him  by  some 
means  unrelated  to  the  act.  The  consequences 
are  often  as  unpleasant  for  the  parent  as  for 
the  child,  and  the  temptation  to  weaken  is  very 
great ;  but  if  one  cannot  be  consistent  and  firm, 
it  is  impossible  to  train  the  child  as  he  should 
be  trained,  and  the  consequences  that  are  de- 
feated now  are  only  retarded,  for  every  wrong 
is  punished  or  atoned  for  sooner  or  later. 

In  the  Divine  Comedy,  Dante  inflicts  on  the 
lost  souls  of  the  Inferno  the  punishments  that 
fit  their  sins.  The  soul  which  had  been  arro- 
gant in  life  is  there  in  filth  and  mire  disguised. 
The  man  who  had  been  remarkable  for  the  ex- 
treme irascibility  of  his  temper  turns  on  him- 
self his  avenging  fangs.  The  heretics  are  pun- 
ished in  the  city  of  Dis  in  tombs  burning  with 
intense  fire.  The  souls  of  tyrants,  who  were 
given  to  blood  and  rapine,  in  the  seventh  circle 
rail  aloud  their  merciless  wrongs.  The  hypo- 
crites are  punished  by  being  compelled  to  pace 
around  the  gulf  under  the  pressure  of  caps  and 
hoods  that  are  gilt  on  the  outside  but  leaden 
within.  The  selfish,  they  who  have  betrayed 
their  benefactors,  are  wholly  covered  with  ice 
in  the  lower  stratum  of  the  Inferno,  for  selfish- 
ness is  the  most  ineradicable  of  sins. 

In  training  the  child  to  orderly  habits  this 


Punishment  and  Reward  77 

method  is  also  most  efficacious  ;  if  the  disorder 
he  creates  is  left  for  another  to  restore,  he  is 
encouraged  to  continue  it,  whereas  if  the  res- 
toration falls  on  him,  he  will  soon  discontinue 
the  habit;  the  greater  the  inconvenience  he 
suffers  in  consequence  of  his  neglect,  the  more 
it  will  impress  him,  and  his  sense  of  justice  will 
suffer  no  violation  by  sucli  treatment.  If  the 
child  who  leaves  his  clothes  on  the  floor  at 
night  on  retiring  is  awakened  and  compelled  to 
arise  and  arrange  them  properly,  the  neglect 
will  not  occur  often.  In  this  method  of  punish- 
ment, however,  regularity  and  perseverance  are 
imperative. 

Cases  occur  in  which  it  is  impossible  to  mete 
out  the  after  effects  of  the  deed,  and  some  form 
of  punishment  is  in  demand.  The  child  might 
be  deprived  of  some  pleasure  or  indulgence,  or 
indeed,  almost  any  form  of  punishment  may 
then  be  resorted  to,  except  such  as  the  child 
may  feel  to  be  a  pure  gratification  of  the  par- 
ent's displeasure,  which  induces  a  sense  of  in- 
justice. 

Corporal  punishment  is  never  inflicted  except 
in  cases  where  one  has  some  physical  advan- 
tage, and  it  seems  cowardly  to  use  one's  supe- 
rior strength  on  a  weaker  body.  *'  Do  you  know 
why  I  whip  you  ?  "  asked  a  father  of  his  little 
boy.  "  Yes,  sir,  because  you  are  the  biggest," 
replied  the  latter ;  and  too  often  in  such  pun- 


78  Child    Culture 

ishments  there  is  an  excitement  of  the  animal 
nature,  insensible  alike  to  the  claims  of  right 
and  reason.  One  is  apt  to  act  impulsively  in 
such  administrations  of  justice,  whereas  a  little 
delay,  a  little  more  thorough  examination  of 
the  child's  defence,  or  of  the  circumstances, 
might  render  the  chastisement  unnecessary,  and 
grant  a  juster  decision. 

As  to  the  proper  treatment  of  specific  cases 
there  can  be  no  rigid,  unvarying  rule  suited  to 
all,  or  even  to  the  same  child  at  all  times;  chil- 
dren differ  so  in  their  sensibilities  and  in  the 
degree  of  their  amenability  to  punishment. 
Some  there  are,  who  in  childhood  were  victims 
of  frequent  whippings,  yet  who  seem  to  recall 
them  with  relish  and  a  feeling  that  they  were 
well  deserved  and  most  beneficial ;  while  in 
others  the  remembrance  arouses  almost  as  great 
indignation  and  rebellion  as  the  actual  admin- 
istration aroused.  The  inference  is,  that  for 
the  former  a  milder  punishment  would  not 
have  sufficed,  whereas  for  the  latter  the  sever- 
ity was  unnecessary.  Very  good  effects  seem 
to  have  resulted  from  both  modes,  so  one  can 
formulate  no  data  therefrom.  The  sentiment 
of  fear  can  only  be  effective  by  making  a  cow- 
ard of  the  child.  He  follows  the  right  only  be- 
cause he  has  not  the  courage  to  bear  the  pain 
that  would  follow  the  course  he  wishes  to  fol- 
low, and  if  he  submits  he  still  harbors  a  rebel- 


Punishment  and  Reward  79 

lious  spirit ;  both  results  do  injury  to  his  char- 
acter. 

If  corporal  punishment  may  enter  into  the 
sentiment  of  moriil  authority  it  should  not  have 
too  much  prominence,  nor  be  permitted  to  en- 
croach on  other  forms  of  punishment.  In  no 
case  should  the  parent  show  brutal  anger  to  the 
child,  or  he  also  will  feel  justified  in  being  pas- 
sionate and  brutal.  Indignation  and  not  anger 
should  be  the  accompanying  sentiment.  The 
justification  of  corporal  punishment  lies  in  its 
application  to  cases  of  such  serious  nature  that 
they  cannot  be  temporized  with,  but  must  be 
met  with  the  greatest  severity  possible,  and  in 
the  certainty  that  such  acts,  if  not  checked, 
will  cause  the  child  to  suffer  later  in  life  much 
ruder  consequences.  The  connection  between 
cause  and  effect  can  be  explained  to  him,  the 
logical  sequence  of  wrong  giving  it  the  stamp 
of  justice,  and  if  one  wishes  the  child  to  be 
just,  one  must  deal  justly  with  him.  Scoldings 
and  whippings  should  not  be  of  frequent  occur- 
rence, as  the  child  will  become  insensible  to 
them,  and  experience  teaches  that  children 
who  are  whipped  for  every  offence  are  the  most 
unmanageable  of  all,  and  their  parents  are  al- 
ways at  their  wits'  end  to  know  what  to  do 
with  them.  A  child  should  never  be  punished 
for  accidents  or  inadvertencies  in  which  there 
is  no  conscious  or  intentional  guilt.     He  must 


8o  Child    Culture 

be  thorouglilj  instructed  in  the  nature  of 
wrong,  and  even  after  conscious  sins  that  are 
the  result  of  impulse,  it  would  be  most  disas- 
trous to  punish  him  for  the  misdeed  if  his  re- 
morse is  already  awakened,  for  repentance  and 
reformation  are  all  that  punishment  is  to  effect. 
Consequentl}^  if  they  already  exist,  the  inflic- 
tion is  not  only  superfluous  but  destroys  what 
genuine  repentance  he  has  felt.  In  this  respect 
the  administration  of  justice  in  the  home  differs 
from  the  civic  administration ;  the  former,  be- 
ing educative,  individual,  and  more  for  the 
moral  effect  and  development  than  for  atone- 
ment and  the  protection  of  society,  greater 
elasticity  is  permissible.  To  be  effectual,  cor- 
poral punishment  should  be  reserved  for  excep- 
tional cases  of  rare  occurrence,  and  open  dis- 
obedience. The  essentially  exceptional  char- 
acter of  it  makes  it  formidable  and  a  powerful 
means  of  impressing  the  child's  mind. 

As  the  object  of  punishment  is  to  awaken 
remorse,  a  moral  color  should  pervade  it,  and 
as  the  child  matures,  moral  pain  be  substi- 
tuted for  physical  pain.  If  the  same  offence  is 
repeated  for  whicli  the  child  has  once  or  twice 
been  whipped,  that  form  of  punishment  should 
not  be  continued,  nor  should  he  be  punished 
frequently  for  other  grievous  offences,  for  the 
moral  effect  is  soon  exhausted,  and  frequency 
makes  the  child  accustomed  to  being  punished, 


Punishment  and  Reward  81 

— a  deplorable  result.  It  is  better  to  cbange 
tlie  punishment;  and  even  not  to  notice  the 
offence  for  awhile  is  sometimes  advisable. 
It  is  doubtful  whether  such  chastisement  is 
ever  inflicted  by  a  thoughtful  parent  without 
an  after  sentiment  of  regret  and  shame  from 
the  feeling  that  after  all  it  was  only  a  vic- 
tory of  brute  force,  because  he  was  the 
stronger.  It  should  never  be  administered  ex- 
cept where  the  parent  is  calm  and  dispassion- 
ate, at  which  time  it  will  be  so  distasteful 
to  him  that  he  will  suffer  as  much  as  the 
child. 

Let  each  reward  be  of  the  character  of  the 
meritorious  act ;  spiritual  effort  should  not  be 
rewarded  by  material  gain.  The  child's  self- 
control  should  not  be  moved  by  appeals  to  his 
physical  gratification  and  pleasure,  as  it  en- 
courages that  in  him  which  is  already  too 
prominent.  How  can  a  child  develop  true  un- 
selfishness, when  the  selfishness  that  already 
exists  is  used  to  destroy  another  form  of  it ;  it 
only  substitutes  one  form  of  error  for  another. 
If  the  mother  says  to  her  child — "  Give  your 
little  brother  some  of  your  apple  and  I  will  buy 
you  another,  or  a  finer  one,*'  his  selfish  spirit 
alone  is  incited,  aud  though  he  thereupon  share 
his  fruit,  the  act  has  not  an  element  of  merit, 
for  there  was  no  unselfishness  in  it, — nothing 


82  Child    Culture 

but  pure  gain  having  prompted  him.  Higher 
ideals  should  inspire  him,  such  as  love,  desire 
of  another's  respect,  his  own  self-respect,  the 
impossibility  of  attaining  peace  and  happiness 
without  goodness.  By  receiving  right  forms  of 
reward  and  punishment  he  will  soon  realize 
that  by  well  doing  alone  does  contentment 
come  to  him,  that  only  by  integrity  and  up- 
rightness can  he  command  the  respect  of  his 
fellow-man,  that  only  by  an  extension  of  his  own 
sympathies  can  he  create  love  in  those  around 
him.  Only  by  suffering  the  consequences  of 
ignorance,  sin,  and  weakness,  is  the  need  of  a 
remedy  urged.  On  this  law  of  cause  and  effect 
hangs  the  progress  of  the  world ;  it  is  inevita- 
ble, just,  and  to  man's  ultimate  benefit.  The 
recognition  of  this  law  is  the  aim  and  attain- 
ment of  punishment,  and  the  wise  man  knows 
that  it  is  useless  to  try  to  thwart  or  to  evade  it, 
that  he  can  only  adjust  himself  to  it,  and  the 
wise  parent  will  bring  out  in  his  child's  disci- 
pline the  divine  law  of  justice  and  compensa- 
tion. 

"  He  that  spareth  his  rod  hateth  his  son,  but 
he  that  loveth  him  chasteneth  him  betimes." 
These  words  of  Solomon  have  influenced 
countless  numbers  of  parents  to  the  wielding 
of  the  rod,  but  like  many  injunctions  of  the 
Bible  are  probably  symbolic.  If  by  the  "  rod  " 
is  meant  "punishment,"  the  proverb  is  a  salu- 


Punishment  and  Reward  83 

tary  one  ;  but  as  so  many  of  the  practices  of 
the  Old  Testament  were  set  at  naught  by 
Christ  in  the  higher  law  of  the  New  Testament, 
it  is  remarkable  that  these  words  of  the  king 
with  the  seven  hundred  wives  and  three  hun- 
dred other  lady  friends,  who,  though  he  uttered 
much  wisdom,  did  not  always  practice  it,  but 
fell  from  the  grace  of  the  Lord, — should  have 
such  weight  in  all  households,  and  in  every 
generation  of  parents.  But  all  proverbs  in 
which  another  is  the  victim,  are  easier  of  re- 
membrance and  execution. 

Rewarding  children  for  goodness  is  a  false 
sentiment,  and  checks  rather  than  aids  their 
right  development,  for  it  induces  false  motives. 
Policy  I  Expediency !  Diplomacy !  These  words 
should  have  no  place  in  the  child's  education. 
Without  a  doubt  the  right  way  is  also  ulti- 
mately the  advantageous  way,  but  if  it  were 
not,  it  should  still  be  the  guide ;  instead  of 
teaching  that  "Honesty  is  the  best  policy," 
teach  that  honesty  is  the  best  principle^  even  if 
it  were  not  the  best  policy ;  that  man  must  do 
right  whether  it  pays  or  not.  When  principle 
is  involved,  the  question,  "Will  it  pay?"  should 
never  arise.  The  child  may  be  rewarded  for 
correcting  himself  of  bad  personal  habits  in 
which  no  mortal  question  is  involved,  or  even 
for  exceptional  good  work  in  his  studies  if  the 
effort  has  been  a  difficult  one,  although  even 


84  Child    Culture 

that  is  ot  doubtful  .idvisability ;  but  for  his 
spiritual  advancement,  or  moral  rectitude, — 
never.  That  is  his  duty  to  God,  and  should 
not  be  placed  on  a  low  material  plane. 


VII 

THE  VALUE  OF  PLAY 

Nothing  more  clearly  demonstrates  the 
fallibility  and  mutability  of  human  views  than 
the  fact  that  what  is  deemed  sinfulness  in  one 
generation  becomes  a  chief  agency  of  educa- 
tion in  another;  the  playful  tendencies  of 
children  were  regarded  by  Puritan  asceticism 
as  evidence  of  depravity,  while  they  are  now 
admitted  to  be  the  heart  of  child-education. 
In  the  child's  early  years  play  is  the  agency 
that  gives  him  health,  acquaintance  with  his  en- 
vironment, and  unconscious  sympathy  with  the 
natural,  the  human,  and  the  divine. 

*  Physical  impressions  are  at  first  the  only 
mediums  possible  for  awakening  the  child's 
sensibilities ;  the  impressions  of  that  early 
period  should  therefore  be  regulated,  and  not 

left  to   chance It  is  not  advised  that 

one  shall  enter  the  realm  of  babyhood,  and  in- 
terfere with  the  infant's  legitimate  tastes  by 
pragmatic  pedagogic  reasoning,  but  that  one 
shall  select  his  toys  and  plays  wisely,  and  then 
let  him  enjoy  the  emotional  impressions  they 
create  ;  his  toys  speak  to  his  feelings,  his  im- 
agination, as  nothing  else  can.  The  baby  has 
85 


86  Child    Culture 

not  reached  the  age  of  investigation  and  has  no 
vulgar  curiosity  as  to  the  internal  arrangements 
of  his  woolly  bunny  or  kitten,  but  hugs  it  to 
his  breast  and  loves  and  reveres  it  in  its  en- 
tirety.' As  he  advances  in  years  and  under- 
stands and  participates  in  games  and  play,  these 
should  contain  purpose  and  not  be  altogether 
trivial  in  character ;  if  the  moral  and  intel- 
lectual powers,  through  evil  heredity  or  other- 
wise, are  not  properly  balanced,  rightly  directed 
plays  may  be  made  the  agency  for  restoring  the* 
harmony.  Play  is  an  absolute  necessity  to  his 
physical  life,  which  depends  very  greatly  on 
the  exercise  he  takes,  and  no  exercise  is  so 
beneficial  as  that  which  has  a  motive,  which  is 
therefore  voluntary  and  pleasurable.  Running 
produces  a  healthy  development  of  the  lungs 
and  limbs  attainable  by  no  other  method. 

The  work  and  business  of  life  are  so  en- 
grossing that  in  the  ordinary  household  the 
child  is  left  to  the  atmosphere  of  servants,  the 
street  and  chance.  The  problem  is  how  to 
furnish  fair,  faithful  environment  for  these 
chrysalis  breaking  years,  when  the  habits  are 
forming,  the  imagination  is  awakening,  and  the 
emotions  are  quickening.  A  great  deal  may  be 
done  through  the  medium  of  the  child's  play 
and  playthings.  It  is  claimed  that  the  periods 
of  man's  life  run  parallel  to  the  racial  periods. 
The  races  in  their  primitive  savage  states  are 


The  Value  of  Play  87 

preeminently  physicial,  and  struggle  for  the 
mastery  of  the  material  world ;  so  the  first 
years  of  the  child's  life  are  absorbed  in  its 
physical  growth,  and  in  securing  concrete  im- 
pressions. Then,  in  the  development  of  the 
race  follows  the  period  when  the  intellectual 
begins  to  join  forces  with  the  physical,  and  the 
dawn  of  civilization  rises  in  the  skilled  use  of 
the  primitive  man's  hands,  in  his  mastery  of 
numbers;  and  in  the  modification  of  the  choric 
dances  and  shouting  songs  to  the  dawning 
music  of  civilization.  This  is  the  time  of  his 
greatest  triumphs,  and  is  the  corresponding 
period  in  the  child's  life  which  must  be  bridged 
for  him  that  he  may  emerge  from  the  purely 
physical,  and  begin  to  realize  his  intellectual 
and  moral  possibilities. 

The  child  thinks  only  through  symbols,  that 
is,  he  realizes  his  own  concept  of  what  he  has 
seen  and  heard.  Froebel's  plays  and  games 
give  him  a  symbolic  education,  and  he  is  led 
through  a  series  of  primitive  occupations  such 
as  plaiting,  weaving,  modeling,  through  games 
and  dances  which  bring  into  play  all  the  social 
relations.  The  purpose  of  the  plays  is  manifold  ; 
to  awaken  the  child's  interest  and  sympathy ; 
to  lead  him  along  the  path  the  race  has  trod, 
and  to  teach  him  self-government.  If  the 
child  has  not  access  to  the  kindergarten,  many 
of  the  songs  and  much  of  the  manual  work  of 


88  Child    Culture 

the  Froebel  System  can  be  introduced  into  the 
home,  and  when  there  are  several  children  a 
great  number  of  the  plays  can  be  used.  The 
mother  or  superintendent  of  the  plays  should 
not  permit  them  to  be  carelessly  produced, 
nor  to  degenerate  into  mere  romps.  They 
should  be  conducted  by  a  woman  educated  in 
the  principles  and  theories  underlying  them. 
The  intellectual  and  moral  development 
through  play  is  very  important.  The  childish 
heart  opens  spontaneously  in  play,  and  while 
the  barriers  are  down,  the  wise  teacher  can 
enter  and  lead  the  child's  sympathies  as  she 
wishes.  While  his  interest  is  aroused  his  emo- 
tions are  accessible,  and  through  the  emotions 
one  reaches  his  thought,  thence  his  will,  and 
from  his  will  the  influence  extends  to  his  char- 
acter. It  is  only  necessary  that  his  environ- 
ment be  right,  for  in  his  plays  and  in  his  grow- 
ing personality  he  will  reflect  his  environment. 
The  undirected  plays  of  children  are  almost 
always  those  of  imitation ;  in  fact  not  only  their 
plays,  but  their  manners  and  personalities  are 
the  result  of  an  unconscious  imitation  of  the 
persons  who  surround  them  in  childhood.  A 
child  who  has  for  sole  associates  his  father  and 
mother  will  be  a  small  copy  of  one  or  both ;  he 
cannot  interpret  their  actions,  but  he  gives  a 
blind  imitation  of  them.  In  intercourse  with 
brother,  sister  or  playmate,  just  so  far  as  his 


The  Value  of  Play  89 

sensibilities  are  moved,  he  imitates  them,  and 
in  imitation  his  habits  are  formed.  It  is,  there- 
fore, most  important  that  while  his  habits  are 
crystallizing,  his  associates  be  of  superior  char- 
acter, and  if  an  underbred  maid  or  street  gamin 
are  his  sole  companions,  what  can  one  hope  for? 
By  a  varied  contact,  by  receiving  suggestions 
from  many  sources  instead  of  from  only  one  or 
two,  he  is  compelled  to  make  a  choice,  and  thus 
in  the  stress  of  the  conflict  of  suggestions  the 
conscience  is  born  and  his  ethical  life  dawns. 
The  friendships  and  companions  should  not, 
therefore,  be  too  limited,  but  should  have  some 
variety,  for  variety  of  association  is  the  soul  of 
originality. 

By  imitation  the  child  learns  to  understand. 
When  he  is  imitating  the  fluttering  and  flight 
of  the  bird  or  butterfly,  he  is  entering  into 
sympathy  with  bird  and  butterfly  life  ;  when 
the  boy,  as  father  bird,  roams  out  in  search  of 
the  worms  for  his  baby  birds,  he  not  only  expe- 
riences the  feelings  of  the  father  bird,  but  the 
instincts  of  fatherhood,  protection,  and  respon- 
sibility are  fostered  in  his  own  breast.  As  she 
plays  the  mother  sheep  caring  for  her  white 
lambkins,  the  little  girl's  maternal  instincts  are 
quickened,  and  she  is  for  the  moment  the  mother 
of  white  lambkins,  and  learns  to  love  her  flock. 
In  all  Froebel's  plays  he  mirrors  the  instinct  of 
universal  life ;  he  makes  the  child  undergo  "  a 


90  Child    Culture 

systematized  sequence  of  experience  through 
which  he  grows  into  self-knowledge,  clear  ob- 
servation and  unconscious  perception  of,  the 
whole  circle  of  relationships,"  until  the  symbols 
of  the  plays  become  the  truth  symbolized  in 
the  child's  character  and  personality.  Froebel 
believes  in  positives,  not  negatives  in  teaching; 
in  stimulants  instead  of  in  deterrents.  Every 
child  is  on  the  warpath  for  something  to  do, 
and  his  interest  is  in  objects,  in  the  concrete ; 
he  wants  his  senses  fed,  he  wants  to  examine, 
to  feel,  to  see  and  hear  the  material  things  of 
this,  to  him,  new  world,  and  when  he  has  taken 
in  the  living  facts,  when  he  has  perceived,  com- 
pared, and  been  instructed  in  his  surroundings, 
then  he  is  ready  to  see  and  hear  what  others 
have  seen  and  heard.  He  must  first  know  ob- 
jects, then  thoughts  and  their  progress. 

As  soon  as  the  child  attains  consciousness, 
he  manifests  a  taste  for  imitating  every  live 
thing  with  which  he  comes  in  contact ;  first  the 
sounds  of  the  rooster,  the  dog,  cat  and  cow ; 
then  the  actions  and  instincts  of  these  animals 
should  be  observed.  He  also  personifies  still 
life,  and  his  father's  cane  becomes  an  uncon- 
trollable charger,  which  he  seeks  to  tame.  The 
little  girl  showers  on  her  rag  babies  all  the  love 
and  affection  which  she  has  herself  received 
from  her  own  mother ;  every  toy,  no  matter  how 
damaged  or  raemberless,  plays  a  part  in  her 


The  Value  of  Play  91 

dramatic  imagination,  and  the  child  meanwhile 
grows  in  sympathy  and  in  comprehension  of 
the  ever  widening  circle  of  human  relationships. 
"Every  conscious  intellectual  phase  of  the 
mind  is  preceded  by  the  symbolic  stage."  The 
child  illumines  with  his  imagination  all  the 
realties  that  surround  him  and  tries  to  combine 
his  fancy  with  the  fact ;  he  overlooks  most 
glaring  deficiencies  for  the  purpose  of  his  play ; 
a  wooden  post  makes  a  superb  father,  and  a 
chair  or  table  a  most  satisfactory  mother,  and 
the  fertility  of  his  mind  is  manifest  in  the  use 
he  makes  of  the  materials  supplied  by  his  en- 
vironment. As  the  play  progresses  the  pictures 
of  father  and  mother  emerge  strangely  like  the 
ones  in  the  next  room  ;  the  quality  of  his  own 
father  and  mother  speak  out  to  the  life  in  their 
wooden  representatives;  the  tenderness,  care, 
dignity,  self-denial  of  the  mother  are  all  de- 
picted, and  alas !  also  any  impatience  or  other 
imperfection  of  which  she  may  have  been  guilty. 
The  child  sacrifices  nothing  to  ideality — he  is 
an  intense  realist.  One  may  truly  say  that 
heredity  does  not  end,  but  only  begins  at 
birth. 

These  plays  embody  very  rich  lessons  for  the 
child.  In  the  enactment  of  the  role  of  mother, 
so  often  played  by  little  girls,  in  the  kindly  of- 
fices which  she  takes  pleasure  in  performing  for 
others,  in  her  noble  self-denial  for  her  imaginary 


92  Child    Culture 

child,  in  her  sense  of  responsibility  then  as- 
sumed, the  little  player  receives  direct  valuable 
education,  none  the  less  so  because  it  is  uncon- 
sciously imbibed.  In  impersonating  the  good 
qualities  of  her  mother,  she  has  also  appreciated 
them,  and  by  frequent  repeatings  they  become 
ingrained  in  her  nature.  If  good  qualities  pre- 
dominate in  the  parents,  then  more  good  quali- 
ties will  be  reflected  in  the  little  imitation ; 
qualities  of  the  opposite  character  are  likewise 
reflected.  If,  then,  by  the  imitations  of  its  en- 
vironment the  child's  nature  is  formed  and  in- 
structed, how  carefully  guarded  should  be  that 
environment ;  how  the  mother  should  every 
moment  protect  her  little  one  from  evil,  stimu- 
late it  to  good,  how  she  should  use  its  games 
and  plays  to  instil  right  impressions,  direct  its 
communications  with  nature,  and  give  it  con- 
tact only  with  goodness,  beauty  and  wisdom. 

Parents  labor  hard  and  self-sacrificingly  for 
their  child's  material  welfare  and  advancement, 
but  too  often  the  mental  growth,  the  formation 
of  its  character  and  personality  is  left  to  chance, 
or  to  beings  so  ignorant  and  incompetent,  if 
not  immoral,  that  in  their  unfitness  for  better 
things  they  engage  to  attend  a  child.  The 
child's  attendant  is  often  the  least  capable,  most 
poorly  compensated  domestic  in  the  household, 
when  she  should  be  the  superior,  and  the 
best  paid.    Pater-familias  pays  forty  dollars  per 


The  Value  of  Play  93 

month  to  some  one  to  care  for  his  horses,  and 
from  ten  to  fifteen  dollars  for  a  maid  to  care  for 
his  child.  What  matters  it  if  cobwebs  hang  in 
the  corners,  so  long  as  none  enter  the  child's 
brain;  what  signifies  it  whether  the  kitchen 
chef  is  adept  at  making  entrees  or  pastries  if 
the  child's  heart  and  soul  remain  pure  and 
healthy  ?  Sidney  Smith  says,  "  If  you  make 
children  happy  now,  you  will  make  them  happy 
twenty  years  hence  by  the  memory  of  it."  Let 
the  child  have  a  joyous,  natural,  happy  child- 
hood in  the  best  sense  of  happiness  ;  not  by  in- 
dulging selfish,  rude  propensities,  but  by  direct- 
ing wisely  his  instincts  into  self-forgetfulness, 
and  consideration  of  the  rights  of  all  around 
him,  by  unlocking  to  him  the  significance  of 
family  and  social  relationships  that  he  may  grow 
in  sympathy  with  them. 

"  The  further  intellectual  advantages  of  play 
are  the  demands  for  concentration  of  attention 
on  the  details  and  exigencies  of  the  game,  the 
quick  judgment  necessary  to  success,  and  the 
determined  effort  to  execute  the  player's  own 
decision.  These  requirements  produce  the  most 
important  of  intellectual  results — *  The  co- 
ordination of  the  different  parts  of  the  brain  ; 
they  develop  mental  alertness,  directness  in 
conclusions,  and  the  tendency  to  execute  these 
conclusions  wisely  and  skilfully  to  the  full  ex- 
tent of  the  individual's  power.' 


94  Child    Culture 

"In  play,  moral  qualities  and  powers  are  also 
wrought  into  the  child's  character,  which  are 
much  more  definite  and  thorough  than  those 
developed  by  admonition.  Self-control  is  re- 
quired through  the  duties  and  demands  of  the 
game,  respectful  submission  to  authority  is  a 
rule  which  cannot  be  departed  from ;  energy  is 
cultivated  by  the  needs  of  prompt,  vigorous  ef- 
forts to  succeed.  Hopeful  perseverance  in  over- 
coming difficulties  is  the  only  road  to  victory, 
and  courage  to  rise  again  after  defeat  is  taught 
by  the  players  repeating  the  struggle  again 
after  every  failure.  All  powers  grow  by  self- 
activity,  by  conscious  putting  forth  of  earnest 
effort,  and  in  games  many  intellectual  and 
moral  activities  are  brought  into  play,  and  are 
necessary  to  their  success."  ^ 

Toys  are  valuable  in  promoting  plays  as  they 
appeal  to  the  child's  heart,  and  aid  his  imagina- 
tion. A  boy  can  realize  himself  much  more  of 
a  soldier  if  he  is  properly  equipped  with  gun 
and  sword,  breastplates,  epaulets  and  vizor, 
although  sticks  and  brooms  and  paper  caps 
serve  a  very  imaginative  child  admirably  for 
lack  of  better.  A  boy  can  realize  himself  a 
much  better  engineer  or  conductor  if  he  has  an 
engine  with  a  real  train  of  cars  attached  to  it, 
though  a  train  of  empty  spools  has  been  known 

'  Educational  Review  Nov.  1894.  Educational  Value  of 
Play,  by  J.  L.  Hughes. 


The  Value  of  Play  95 

to  puff  and  whistle  and  let  off  steam  in  won- 
drous fashion.  By  the  aid  of  toys  the  child  at 
least  realizes  much  better  the  prototype  which 
he  emulates  and  which  has  become  his  ideal, 
therefore  the  toys  of  different  nations  reveal  the 
leading  characteristics  and  aims  of  those  na- 
tions. In  France  the  dolls  are  most  artistically 
dressed,  are  surrounded  by  much  detail  of 
finery,  and  all  the  toys  show  versatility  and  in- 
genuity. The  toys  in  Germany  are  much  more 
substantially  and  less  artistically  made ;  the 
doll  house  with  clean  floors  and  stiff  furniture 
and  the  complete  kitchen  with  all  the  accesso- 
ries of  the  thorough  housewife — the  ideal  char- 
acter of  the  German  woman.  Then  there  are 
beautiful,  perfectly  outfitted  butchers'  and  bak- 
ers' shops  for  boys,  all  representing  the  thrifty 
trade  life  of  the  middle  classes  of  Germany. 
Some  one  has  said :  "  If  you  tell  me  what  your 
children  play  with,  we  will  tell  you  what  sort 
of  women  and  men  they  will  be ;  so  let  this  re- 
public make  the  toys  which  will  raise  the  moral 
and  artistic  character  of  her  children." 

Kate  Douglas  Wiggin  says  in  her  chapter  on 
"  Playthings  "  in  "  Children's  Rights,"  "  Every 
thoughtful  person  knows  that  the  simple  nat- 
ural playthings  of  the  old-fashioned  child, 
which  are  nothing  more  than  pegs  on  which  he 
hangs  his  glowing  fancies,  are  healthier  than 
ftre   the   complicated    modern    mechanisms  in 


96  Child    Culture 

which  the  child  has  only  to  press  the  buttons 
and  the  toys  do  the  rest. 

"  The  electric  talking  doll,  for  example  ;  im- 
agine a  generation  of  children  brought  up  on 
that !  And  the  toymakers  are  not  even  con- 
tent with  this  grand  personage,  four  feet  high, 
who  says :  '  Papa  !'  *  Mama  ! '  She  is  passee  al- 
ready ;  they  have  begun  to  improve  on  her  I 
An  electrician  described  a  superb  new  altruistic 
doll,  fitted  to  the  needs  of  the  present  decade. 
You  are  to  press  a  judiciously  located  button 
and  ask  her  the  test  question  which  is,  if  she 
will  have  some  candy ;  whereupon  with  angelic 
detached  movement — smile  (located  in  the  left 
cheek)  she  answers  :  '  Give  brother  big  piece ; 
give  me  little  piece  I  *  If  the  thing  gets  out  of 
order  (and  I  devoutly  hope  it  will)  it  will 
doubtlessly  return  to  a  state  of  nature,  and 
horrify  the  bystanders  by  remarking  :  *  Give 
me  big  piece  ;  give  brother  little  piece  !  * 

"  Think  of  having  a  gilded  dummy  like  that 
given  you  to  amuse  yourself  with  !  Think  of 
having  to  play,  to  play,  forsooth  with  a  model 
of  propriety,  a  high-minded  monstrosity  like 
that !  Doesn't  it  make  you  long  for  your  dear 
old  darkey  doll  with  the  raveled  mouth,  and 
the  stuffing  leaking  out  of  her  legs ;  or  your 
beloved  Arabella  Clarinda,  with  the  broken 
nose,  beautiful  even  in  dissolution — "  creatures 
not  too  bright  or  good  for  human  nature's  daily 


The  Value  of  Play  97 

food  ?  "  Banged,  battered,  hairless,  sharers  of 
our  mad  joys  and  reckless  sorrows,  how  we 
loved  them  in  their  simple  ugliness !  With 
what  halo  of  romance  we  surrounded  them! 
With  what  devotion  we  nursed  the  one  with 
the  broken  head,  in  those  early  days  when  new 
heads  were  not  to  be  bought  at  the  nearest 
shop !  And  even  if  they  could  have  been  pur- 
chased for  us,  would  we,  the  primitive  children 
of  those  dear,  dark  ages,  have  ever  thought  of 
wrenching  off  the  cracked  blonde  head  of  Eth- 
elinda  and  buying  a  new  strange,  nameless  bru- 
nette head,  gluing  it  calmly  on  Ethelinda's 
body,  as  a  small  acquaintance  of  mine  did  last 
week,  apparently  without  a  single  pang  ? 
Never !  A  doll  had  a  personality  in  those 
times,  and  has  yet,  to  a  few  simple  backwoods 
souls  even  in  this  day  and  generation.'* 

The  imitations  of  real  life  appeal  to  the  min- 
iature man  and  woman ;  they  are  adapted  to 
his  and  her  size  and  symbolize  the  real  things 
which  will  interest  them  later.  The  little  boy 
sells  the  apples  out  of  his  toy  cart  with  all  the 
dignity,  tone  and  commercial  spirit  of  the  real 
tradesman  of  whom  he  buys,  and  with  the  de- 
light which  an  ever-varying  trade  confers.  How 
many  battles  the  boy  fights  with  his  toy  im- 
plements of  war  before  a  real  battle  is  forced 
upon  him ;  how  much  responsibility  the  little 
girl  assumes  in  the  management  of  her  large 


98  Child    Culture 

family  of  dolls,  in  the  manage  of  her  doll  house, 
and  the  conduct  of  her  kitchen,  before  she  en- 
ters on  the  real  duties  of  motherhood !  The 
child's  powers  are  developed  definitely  by  those 
symbols  which  form  a  bridge  between  the  mi- 
crocosm and  the  macrocosm,  between  the  little 
man  with  his  small  capacities  and  the  great  is- 
sues of  life.  They  generate  the  powers  in  em- 
bryo, which,  in  full  development  give  him  the 
conquest  of  all  the  elements  and  forces  of  life, 
and  which,  when  mastered,  surrender  to  him  a 
power  which  seems  almost  divine. 

Most  parents  appreciate  the  need  of  play  in 
the  child's  life,  even  if  they  do  not  know  the 
elements  that  renders  it  wholesome  and  profit- 
able. 

Let  us  examine  into  the  pleasures  provided 
the  older  boys  and  girls. 

It  can  scarcely  be  claimed  that  in  America 
the  older  children,  the  youth  are  in  this  regard 
maltreated  or  unduly  restricted,  although  a  bet- 
ter balance  might  be  established.  In  one 
family  the  whole  aim  seems  to  be  to  repress  the 
animal  spirits  and  love  of  pleasure,  to  give 
them  no  indulgence,  while  in  more  families  a 
continual  round  of  gaiety  becomes  the  object 
of  the  young  man's  and.  young  woman's  ex- 
istence;  they  demand  it  as  imperatively  as 
they  do  their  food.  It  seldom  occurs  in  cases 
of  unnatural  restriction  and  of  neglect  to  pro- 


The  Value  of  Play  99 

vide  legitimate  amusements,  that  there  is  not  a 
rebound ;  for  the  instinct  for  diversion  is  as 
natural  as  any  instinct  in  man's  constitution, 
and  all  attempts  to  destroy  natural  instincts 
terminate  in  revolt  and  reversion.  Neither 
should  the  immoderately  inclined  young  people 
be  permitted  to  indulge  their  bent,  but  it  is  the 
duty  of  all  parents  to  provide  a  modicum  of 
wholesome  amusement  and  recreation  for  the 
youth  of  the  home,  in  the  home,  and  by  so 
doing  the  privilege  of  directing  their  children's 
pleasures  will  remain  with  the  parents. 

By  far  the  best  amusements  are  those  that 
contribute  to  the  general  vitality  and  physical 
development — all  out-of-doors  sports,  which, 
however,  to  be  beneficial  should  be  regular, 
and  not  spasmodic  as  is  too  often  the  case. 
Nothing  contributes  more  to  a  healthy  frame 
of  mind  and  banishes  every  taint  of  the  morbid 
as  a  free  circulation  of  the  blood  induced  by 
an  abundance  of  exercise  and  oxygen.  Danc- 
ing is  good  if  the  benefit  is  not  counterbal- 
anced by  late  suppers,  late  hours,  and  ill  venti- 
lated rooms.  Wise  parents  provide  their  girls 
and  boys  with  elevated  pleasures  at  home,  that 
they  may  have  no  temptations  to  seek  them 
elsewhere ;  they  let  them  feel  that  the  freedom 
of  the  house  is  theirs,  that  they  may  extend 
its  hospitality  at  any  time  with  no,  or  with 
only  short,  notice ;  and  if  one  can  offer  nothing 


loo  Child    Culture 

but  crackers  and  cheese,  it  being  served 
daintily  and  with  a  gracious  welcome,  there  is 
nothing  of  which  to  be  ashamed.  One's  table 
appointments  should  always  be  such  that  they 
will  bear  the  scrutiny  of  an  unexpected  guest. 

It  is  not  advisable  to  permit  young  people  to 
pass  the  night  away  from  home ;  the  habit  is 
open  to  so  many  abuses. 

The  drama,  also,  by  judicious  selections  may 
be  employed  not  only  for  pleasure  but  also  for 
profit ;  but  parents  must  carefully  choose  plays 
containing  the  right  elements.  The  average 
play  is  not,  it  is  to  be  regretted,  of  an  elevat- 
ing character,  and  many  are  undisguisedly  im- 
moral; therefore  it  is  most  unwise  to  permit 
young  girls  and  boys  to  attend  them  indiscrim- 
inately. There  are,  however,  dramatic  produc- 
tions that  are  as  powerful  pleaders  for  good 
morals,  elevated  sentiment,  high-minded  de- 
termination, as  many  sermons  one  hears  in  the 
pulpit,  and  when  the  stage  can,  like  good  litera- 
ture, exert  such  a  potent  ethical  influence,  it  is 
lamentable  that  it  does  not  do  more  in  that  di- 
rection. One  may  as  well  say,  because  there 
are  pernicious  books,  that  one  will  not  read  at 
all,  as  to  decline  to  discriminate  in  the  matter 
of  the  stage.  Since  the  quality  of  the  supply 
must  under  existing  conditions  be  regulated  by 
the  demand,  the  present  predominance  of  the 
unfit  and  the  superficial  would  indicate  a  de- 


The  Value  of  Play  loi 

generate  public  taste.  The  drama  can  never 
become  the  educational  elevating  amusement  it 
should  be  until  it  is  subsidized  by  government 
or  private  endownment.  It  should  be  lifted 
above  the  pecuniary  necessity  of  catering  to 
the  uncultured,  sensuous  public,  under  whose 
patronage  it  must  continue  to  degenerate.  All 
who  desire  its  reform  and  its  great  educational 
possibilities  should  support  only  clean  elevating 
plays  and  encourage  all  effort  to  render  it  inde- 
pendent financially. 

There  are  many  amusements  harmless,  even 
beneficial  in  themselves,  that  are  condemned 
because  of  the  abuse  to  which  they  are  subject, 
but  it  is  much  wiser  to  strike  directly  at  the 
wrong,  and  not  let  the  abuse  of  a  good  thing 
vitiate  the  right  and  legitimate  use  of  it. 

Paul  Bourget  says  that  America's  greatest 
social  vice  is  her  excessiveness ;  this  is  a  weak- 
ness of  new  countries  as  well  as  of  the  new 
rich ;  they  incline  to  overdo.  It  has  its  root  in 
social  rivalry,  struggle  for  prestige,  and  love  of 
display.  Next  to  charity  and  self-sacrifice, 
moderation  is  the  greatest  social  virtue,  and  in- 
dicates good  taste,  good  sense,  and  refinement, 
in  all  who  practice  it. 


VIII 

SELF-BELIANCB 

Routine  is  the  method  by  which  the  child's 
habits  are  established,  but  an  excess  of  routine 
kills  spontaneity  and  renders  him  mechanical. 
This  was  the  serious  defect  of  the  old  educa- 
tional method ;  routine,  unmeaning  words  and 
empty  forms  directed  the  child's  mental  and 
moral  life ;  he  was  treated  as  a  machine  and  no 
account  taken  of  his  nature  or  individual  needs. 

The  basis  of  modern  education  is  the  unfold- 
ing of  the  child's  powers  in  proportion  to  his 
age,  the  measuring  of  his  ability,  the  arousing 
in  him  of  the  spirit  of  the  pioneer  and  of  the 
discoverer  rather  than  that  of  an  imitator.  It 
looks  toward  the  creation  of  an  accountable  be- 
ing who  understands  rather  than  memorizes, 
who  knows  things  rather  than  their  signs. 

A  well  regulated  liberty  from  the  first  should 
be  accorded  him.  That  which  he  desires  to  do 
and  which  is  within  reason,  grant  at  the  first 
asking,  without  urging  or  entreaty  on  his  part. 
Consent  with  pleasure,  and  refuse  unwillingly, 
but  if  wisely,  then  also  irrevocably.  If  his  im- 
portunities cause  you  to  yield  once,  he  will  for- 
ever after  strive,  by  importuning,  to  weaken 
102 


Self-reliance  103 

your  decisions,  and  this  conflict  and  wavering 
between  the  child's  and  parent's  will  is  the 
worst  possible  training ;  it  were  almost  better 
to  let  the  child  be  master  all  the  time  than  for 
first  one  and  then  the  other  to  assume  the  su- 
premacy. 

Both  in  thought  and  conduct  the  child  should 
depend  upon  himself  as  much  as  possible  ;  the 
parents  should  guide  his  thoughts  rather  than 
inflict  their  own  on  him ;  they  should,  when 
necessary  to  aid  him,  instruct  rather  than  ac- 
commodate him.  Parents  seem  to  enjoy  the 
child's  dependence  on  them  and  to  defer  the 
period  of  self-reliance  as  long  as  possible,  think- 
ing perhaps,  that  the  child  may,  at  a  later  age, 
be  spared  the  unpleasant  consequences  of  inex- 
perience ;  but  as  he  learns  mainly  by  experi- 
ence, and  cannot  altogether  escape  the  rude 
teacher,  he  in  reality  gains  nothing  by  a  longer 
period  of  helplessness.  His  faculties  grow  by 
self-activity  alone,  and  neither  his  mother's 
perception  nor  her  experience  can  be  a  total  sub- 
stitute for  his  own. 

The  more  perfect  the  child's  knowledge  of 
the  material  world,  the  more  he  perceives,  com- 
pares, and  discovers,  the  relations  and  uses  of 
the  concrete,  the  greater  will  be  his  mental 
power  when  he  begins  to  judge  and  to  compare 
ideas.  If  he  employs  his  own  intelligence, 
learns  by  his  own  efforts,  is  not  ruled  by  the 


104  Child    Culture 

opinion  of  others,  but  by  his  reason  and  insight, 
he  will  attain  a  mental  vigor  and  understanding 
which  is  never  possessed  by  those  who  receive 
and  depend  on  the  authority  of  other  people. 
Be  his  knowledge  ever  so  little,  let  it  be  so  far 
fundamental ;  let  it  be  largely  self-perceived 
and  free  from  prejudice.  He  should  understand 
and  value  at  first  those  things  that  are  most 
useful  to  him  and  depend  on  himself  for  all  tliat 
is  within  his  capabilities,  for  self-reliance  is  the 
basis  of  strengtli  and  power.  While  books  and 
traditions  contain  valuable  truth,  they  contain 
no  truth  which  is  not  discernible  at  its  source, 
and  the  child  should  glean  his  knowledge  as 
often  as  is  possible  by  his  perception  of  the  first 
truth  whence  the  book  was  derived.  He  should 
verify  opinions  and  traditions  by  passing  them 
through  the  crucible  of  his  own  understanding 
and  judgment,  he  should  let  the  light  of  his 
own  thought  flash  on  the  so-called  truth  he 
would  re-discover,  else  as  Emerson  says,  "To- 
morrow a  stranger  will  say  with  masterly  good 
sense  precisely  what  we  have  thought  and  felt 
all  the  time,  and  we  shall  be  forced  to  take  with 
shame  our  own  opinion  from  another." 

The  child's  knowledge  is  not  large  enough, 
his  power  of  thought  is  not  mature  enough  to 
create  perfect  or  final  judgments  or  weighty 
opinions,  but  if,  during  his  years  of  training 
and  formation  he  acquire  the  habit  of  a  blind 


Self-reliance  1 05 

acceptance  of  current  views,  he  will  never  be- 
come an  original  thinker,  nor  ever  express  his 
own  individuality  in  thought  or  deed.  He  must 
in  these  crystallizing  years  be  inspired  with  a 
respect  for  his  own  convictions,  admitting  al- 
ways the  possibility  of  their  fallibility  and 
granting  due  tolerance  to  the  views  of  other 
people.  A  man  must  be  himself  and  take  him- 
self for  better  or  for  worse  as  his  portion.  The 
issue  will  be  safe  and  good  if  he  puts  his  heart 
into  his  work  and  faithfully  lives  his  most  en- 
lightened convictions,  for  only  by  the  expres- 
sion of  his  best  and  highest  self  can  peace  or 
power  be  his. 

It  has  been  the  greatness  of  all  great  men 
that  they  have  perceived  for  themselves,  trusted 
themselves,  felt  the  right  in  their  hearts  and 
have  expressed  it  in  all  their  being.  One  need 
not  be  aggressive,  neither  need  one  always  be 
conciliating.  A  boy  who  has  not  had  the  con- 
ventional spirit  pressed  upon  him,  who  has  not 
been  cowed  out  of  all  original  expression,  is 
naturally  independent  and  individual  in  his 
opinions.  He  tries  and  sentences  people  and 
facts  on  their  merits,  his  verdict  is  genuine  and 
independent,  and  even  if  it  errs,  or  is  silly,  it 
is  at  least  his  own  and  will  improve  in  quality 
with  an  enlarged  vision.  Emerson,  who  never 
hesitates  to  speak  truly  and  boldly,  says  :  "  So- 
ciety everywhere  is  conspiring  against  the  man- 


lo6  Child    Culture 

hood  of  every  one  of  its  memhers.  Society  is 
a  joint  stock  company,  in  which  the  members 
agree,  for  the  better  securing  of  his  bread  to 
each  shareholder,  to  surrender  the  liberty  and 
culture  of  the  eater.  The  virtue  in  most  re- 
quest is  conformity.  Self-reliance  is  the  aver- 
sion. It  loves  not  realities  and  creations  but 
names  and  customs." 

It  does  not  follow  that  because  one  has  faith 
in  one's  own  convictions  one  need  be  always  as- 
serting or  proclaiming  them ;  one  can  prac- 
tice them  in  living,  without  intruding  them  on 
others.  The  lives  of  the  majority  of  men  are 
not  emanations  from  within,  but  rather  specta- 
cles for  the  edification  of  neighbors  and  friends, 
and  this  living  on  the  circumference  of  life  is 
the  dry-rot  of  the  soul.  Such  persons  never 
come  to  themselves ;  they  have  no  knowledge 
of  their  inherent  tastes,  opinions,  or  principles ; 
they  have  accepted  those  they  found  floating 
near  them,  and  their  lives  and  conduct  have 
conformed  to  this  artificial  light  which  they 
have  mistaken  for  the  light  of  day. 

*  Modern  life  finds  itself  cumbered  with  an 
immense  system  of  institutions,  inherited  tradi- 
tions, established  dogmas  and  customs,  which 
have  come  to  it  from  the  past.  To  this  effete 
system  the  moderns  try  at  first  to  adjust  them- 
selves ;  but  they  find  themselves  hampered  by 
it ;  it  does  not  correspond  to  the  wants  of  actual 


Self-reliance  107 

life  ;  therefore  they  now  endeavor  to  reconstruct 
the  system  to  fit  modern  needs.  The  want  of 
correspondence  between  the  new  wine  of  the 
nineteenth  century  and  the  old  bottles  of  for- 
mer periods  is  now  recognized,  and  a  banish- 
ment of  the  discord  is  being  effected.' 

Goethe,  the  great  liberator  of  modern  Euro- 
pean ideas,  tells  us ;  "  Through  me  the  German 
poets  have  become  aware  that  as  men  must  live 
from  within  outward,  so  the  artist  must  work 
from  within  outward,  seeing  that,  make  what 
contortions  he  will,  he  can  only  bring  to  light 
his  own  individuality."  **  Goethe,"  says  Mat- 
thew Arnold,  "  broke  away  from  routine  think- 
ing, and  was  a  profound,  imperturbable  natural- 
ist; he  puts  the  standard  once  for  all  inside 
every  man,  instead  of  outside  him  ;  when  he  is 
told  such  a  thing  must  be  so,  there  is  immense 
authority  and  custom  for  its  being  so,  it  has 
been  held  to  be  so  for  a  thousand  years,  he  an- 
swers with  Olympian  politeness,  'But  is  it  so? 
Is  it  so  to  me  ?  '  " 

A  man  must  conceive  his  own  duty,  and  ex- 
ecute it  in  his  own  way,  though  there  are  many 
persons  who  think  they  know  another's  duty 
better  than  he  knows  it  himself.  Our  great 
philosopher  has  said  :  "  It  is  easy  in  the  world 
to  live  after  the  world's  opinion ;  it  is  easy  in 
solitude  to  live  after  our  own,  but  the  great 
man  is  he  who  in  the  midst  of  the  crowd  keeps 


)o8  Child    Culture 

with  perfect  sweetness  the  independence  of 
solitude." 

A  man's  possessions  should  be  rooted  in  him- 
self to  have  real  value,  then  no  matter  how 
often  he  is  dispossessed  of  them  he  can  regain 
them,  and  no  robber  can  really  rob  him  ;  a  man 
has  no  real  strength  until  he  can  dispense  with 
all  foreign  support  and  stand  alone  by  his  own 
inherent  abilities.  The  intellectual  powers 
grow  by  the  study  of  master  minds,  but  such 
study  should  always  be  a  means  not  an  end ; 
the  final  opinion  should  be  a  transformation 
from  the  alien  thought  to  the  individual 
thought  and  self-expression.  An  adopted 
thought  can  be  only  half  possessed ;  that  it 
may  nourish,  it  must  become  one's  very  own, 
so  that  one  can  present  no  other. 

It  is  by  the  exercise  of  self-trust  that  a  man 
ascertains  his  power ;  it  is  by  detaching  himself 
from  slavish  concurrence  to  form  and  anti- 
quated opinion,  that  he  learns  his  own  resources 
and  his  own  talent. 

It  is  only  by  independence  of  thought  and 
judgment  that  a  man  can  cleave  to  the  truth, 
and  why  should  not  young  as  well  as  old  be 
permitted  to  construe  an  expressed  view,  to  dis- 
agree with  it,  or  to  dissent  from  it,  provided 
the  difference  of  opinion  be  offered  inoffensively 
and  without  rudeness.  But  if  a  man  is  to  be  a 
law  unto  himself,  there  is  manifold   necessity 


Self-reliance  109 

that  his  sight  be  clear,  his  will  faithful,  and  his 
heart  inspired  for  the  highest.  If  he  choose  for 
himself,  his  choice  should  be  a  more  exalted  one 
than  that  society  has  chosen  for  him.  To  be  a 
non-conformist,  an  eccentric,  a  bizarre  personal- 
ity is  not  the  motive  of  true  individuality,  and 
if  one's  apostasy  contains  no  higher  elements 
than  the  doctrine  or  opinion  one  is  deserting,  if 
the  new  principle  leads  to  no  greater  purpose 
than  the  old,  then  it  probably  contains  false  or 
weak  elements,  which  had  better  be  revised. 
Every  man  has  a  natural  bent,  which,  if  it  does 
not  degrade  him,  he  should  follow;  this  new 
direction,  this  differencing  of  one  man's  mind 
from  other  men's  minds  constitutes  a  man's 
bias ;  it  is  his  special  constitution,  his  individ- 
uality. ''Every  individual  has  a  bias,  which, 
if  he  hopes  to  attain  his  legitimate  power  in  the 
world,  he  must  obey.  It  is  his  magnetic  needle, 
which  points  always  in  one  direction  to  his 
proper  path,  with  more  or  less  variation  from 
another  man's.  He  is  never  happy,  nor  strong 
until  he  finds  it,  keeps  it,  learns  to  be  at  home 
with  himself,  learns  to  watch  the  delicate  tints 
and  insights  that  come  to  him,  and  to  hav6  the 
entire  assurance  of  his  own  mind.  In  morals 
this  is  his  conscience,  in  intellect  his  genius,  in 
practice,  talent — not  to  imitate  or  surpass  a 
particular  man  in  his  "WAY,  but  to  bring  out 
your  own  way." 


no  Child    Culture 

The  number  of  men  is  comparatively  small 
who  appreciate  the  necessity  of  resting  on  the 
real,  of  speaking  their  own  thoughts  and  living 
their  own  lives.  A  man's  surroundings  and 
furnishings  should  bespeak  in  every  detail  his 
individuality,  and  if  he  be  true  to  himself  they 
will;  even  his  expenditure  should  be  his  own, 
and  for  things  which  appertain  to  his  own 
thoughts,  tastes  and  individuality.  An  artist 
surrounds  himself  with  works  of  art  which 
serve  as  studies  and  contemplations  to  him.  It 
is  these  on  which  his  thoughts  love  to  dwell. 
A  literary  man's  great  delight  is  in  his  books, 
and  an  ample  library  is  his  greatest  satisfaction ; 
the  musician  expends  his  means  on  opportuni- 
ties for  listening  to  good  music.  Every  man's 
purchases  should  represent  the  real  proprietor, 
else  they  are  a  sham  and  a  delusion. 

There  are  also  men  who  misinterpret  their 
natures,  who  excuse  every  weakness  and  defect 
by  asserting  "  that  they  cannot  help  it,  that  it  is 
their  nature."  They  mean  their  untrained  in- 
stinct ;  it  is  their  higher  nature  and  not  their 
lower  selves  which  they  should  nominate 
"their  nature."  Man's  higher  nature  is  the 
sum  of  his  natural  tendencies  redeemed  by  his 
best  thought,  and  his  best  spiritual  insight,  and 
when  he  practices  these,  it  will  not  be  in  ex- 
tenuation of  uncontrolled  weakness. 

The  new  education  gives  much  more  atten- 


Self-reliance  1 1 1 

tion  than  did  the  old  to  the  individual  traits  of 
character,  but  still  not  enough.  In  conse- 
quence of  levelling  educational  systems,  the 
present  generation  is  still  cast  too  nearly  in  one 
mental  mould.  Independent,  individual  thought 
and  action  are  not  sufficiently  encouraged. 
We  follow  the  fashion  in  everything  ;  the  child 
is  not  educated  according  to  his  individuality, 
but  according  to  a  prescribed  course,  or  because 
other  children  are  being  educated  on  those 
lines.  But  despite  the  levelling  process  of  the 
present  educational  system,  every  community 
produces  a  few  who  rule  their  fellows  because 
of  their  superior  powers.  The  control  is  made 
easier  for  these  leaders  by  the  fact  that  the  ma- 
jority have  suffered  from  the  levelling  of  their 
powers.  So  the  strong  minded,  the  strongly  in- 
dividualized men  become  the  leaders  of  com- 
munities, states  and  nations.  Monopolies  and 
combinations,  the  great  modern  financial  suc- 
cesses are  made  easy  under  systems  which  sup- 
press individuality.  The  large  majority  is  ruled 
by  a  small  minority  of  master  minds. 

Who  are  the  men  who  succeed  in  the  finan- 
cial world  ?  They  are  not  always  good  men,  nor 
educated  men,  nor  brilliant,  nor  even  skilled 
men.  What  then  is  the  essential  of  all  sus- 
cess  ?  Is  it  not  the  force  of  individualism,  of 
certain  elements  of  character  ?  It  is  therefore 
clear  that  the  greater  number  of  strong,  well 


112  Child    Culture 

developed  individuals  there  are  in  the  world 
the  more  widely  will  the  wealth  of  the  world 
be  dispensed,  the  more  will  that  power,  other- 
wise centralized,  be  diffused  among  the  many. 
Education  must  therefore  give  each  individual 
an  opportunity  to  develop  all  his  latent  power. 
This  is  the  trend  of  modern  social  ethics. 
The  mental  and  moral  faculties  and  the  physi- 
cal powers  must  have  an  harmonious  develop- 
ment, no  one  being  developed  to  excess,  or  at 
the  expense  of  the  other.  Inharmonious  devel- 
opment arises  either  from  a  false  view  of  life, 
or  from  lack  of  sympathy  with  one's  environ- 
ment. By  training  the  perceptions  to  individ- 
ual investigation  of  the  world  of  nature,  by 
teaching  the  child  to  think  for  himself  and  to 
live  from  within,  by  giving  him  all  facility  for 
expressing  his  real,  individual  self,  much  is  done 
in  the  right  direction.  Some  one  has  said  the 
essential  of  great  financial  achievement  is  to 
combine  a  great  caution  with  a  great  venture ; 
so  in  the  development  of  individuality,  great 
conservation  of  all  that  is  good  in  existing  con- 
ditions should  combine  with  a  fearlessness  to 
cast  off  all  that  is  found  to  be  prejudice,  empty 
form,  and  inane  tradition. 


IX 

CHARACTER 

Character  is  the  resultant  of  every  force 
from  within  or  without  which  has  operated  on 
a  man  since  the  first  moment  of  his  existence. 
Nowhere  in  life  is  he  called  upon  to  bear  testi- 
mony when  character  is  not  a  dominant  force. 

The  basis  of  great  character  is  love  of  truth 
and  its  application,  perfect  justice.  There  have 
been  men,  who,  though  nominated  "great," 
possessed  not  this  power,  and  "  greatness  '*  is 
by  no  means  synonymous  with  "great  charac- 
ter." Napoleon  was  intellectual  and  had  a 
penetrating  insight;  we  admire  him  for  his 
enormous  self-trust,  but  he  was  not  just,  and 
lacked  other  elements  of  a  great  character. 
Numberless  heroes  have  won  fame  by  sublime 
daring  and  large  adventures,  possessing  great 
courage, — one  feature  of  strong  character, — 
lacking  some  of  its  other  essentials.  The 
morals  and  the  intellect  must  combine  to  pro- 
duce the  true  quality,  and  the  great  intellect  is 
less  indispensable  than  the  virtuous  principles. 
Goethe,  Voltaire,  Rousseau  and  Byron  were 
brilliant  men,  possessing  in  an  eminent  degree 
the   intellectual   quality,  but  they   were  not 

113 


1 14  Child    Culture 

really  great  as  men.  The  man  of  character  is 
always  superior  to  his  achievements,  is  himself 
greater  than  anything  he  has  said  or  done,  for 
his  power  is  never  exhausted.  He  has  profound 
convictions,  faces  the  reality,  and  is  persuaded 
through  his  own  perceptions.  Character  is  the 
moral  order  incorporate  in  the  individual,  and 
truth  and  justice  are  the  chief  mediums  of  its 
manifestation.  It  is  difficult  to  enumerate  the 
merits  of  the  man  of  character ;  he  is  too  great 
to  be  measured,  and  no  praise  that  is  bestowed 
seems  sufficient  to  depict  him. 

The  greatest  intellectual  gifts  are  denied  to 
a  man  after  his  birth,  but  anyone  can,  by  force 
of  will  and  perseverance,  improve  the  bias  of 
his  character  to  a  degree  that  almost  consti- 
tutes regeneration.  He  need  only  appreciate 
the  grandeur  and  beauty  of  this  higliest  form 
of  nature,  and  his  desire  and  determination  to 
achieve  indicate  his  ability  thereto.  A  man's 
antagonisms  create  his  power,  and  that  which 
he  fights  for  and  against  reveals  the  quality  of 
his  nature,  and  the  degree  of  his  development. 
As  long  as  his  obstruction  is  material,  just  so 
material  is  he ;  as  he  refines,  his  checks  become 
finer ;  as  he  rises  in  the  spiritual  scale,  his  an- 
tagonisms take  a  spiritual  form;  his  battles  are 
always  in  the  line  of  his  development,  and  the 
great  results  of  all  his  struggles  are  the  addi- 
tions they  have  made  to  his  character.     The 


Character  115 

antagonisms  which  overcome  a  man  are  appar- 
ently evil,  but  are  in  reality  good,  and  the  les- 
sons that  make  wisdom  can  come  only  by  fric- 
tion and  striving.  If  there  were  nothing  to 
master,  on  what  would  character  bite  its  teeth 
through  ?  Struggle  is  the  law  of  life,  and  when 
a  man  ceases  to  battle  he  ceases  to  be  of  inter- 
est to  himself  or  his  fellow-man.  Man  comes 
to  nothing  without  antagonisms,  and  precisely 
in  proportion  as  he  turns  evil  into  good,  and 
transforms  antagonism  into  muscle  and  charac- 
ter, he  is  admirable ;  without  labor  his  muscle 
has  no  means  of  development.  How  often  does 
that  which  appeared  a  man's  greatest  curse, 
his  insurmountable  obstruction,  prove  his  great 
blessing,  the  powerful  momentum  of  his  life  ! 

Positive  antagonism  is  essential  to  all  great 
achievement.  What  is  virtue  but  victory? 
What  is  purity  but  temptation  resisted  ?  What 
is  sympathy  but  the  power  one's  own  suffering 
gives  one  to  feel  for  that  of  another?  The 
fruits  of  men's  griefs  are  the  harvests  of  their 
lives.  The  carving  of  character  is  the  work  of 
life ;  it  is  begun  before  the  child  attains  con- 
sciousness; after  that  period  it  gradually  de- 
volves upon  himself  to  learn  the  use  of  the 
tools  out  of  which  this  most  beautiful  and  per- 
fect work  is  to  be  hewn. 

A  great  step  in  the  development  is  the  rec- 
ognition of  the  unity  of  life,  the  omnipresence 


ii6  Child    Culture 

of  law.  When  a  man  concurs  in  the  divine 
regulation,  and  sees  that  what  is  ought  to  be, 
or  is  best,  he  becomes  himself  the  law  giver  be- 
cause he  so  fullj  coincides  with  the  will  of  the 
great  Dictator.  By  his  intellectual  insight  he 
presides  over  every  situation,  and  by  his  con- 
senting spirit  becomes  one  with  the  Designer. 
The  man  of  deepest  thought  will  be  the  strong- 
est character,  for  his  thought  and  affection 
have  joined  his  will  to  the  will  of  Divine 
Providence.  The  strong  character  sees  but 
one  way  to  go  and  goes  that  way  unhesitat- 
ingly. The  forces  that  seem  to  retard  and 
block  his  path  do  not  obstruct  from  his  view 
the  unity  which  he  has  recognized,  and  on 
which  he  relies.  Other  men  believe  in  luck, 
may  in  times  of  trial  believe  in  an  evil  genius, 
but  this  man  believes  in  Providence  and  its  in- 
evitable laws. 

He  also  believes  in  the  law  of  cause  and 
effect  "God's  chancellors  of  justice";  he  knows 
that  "  relation  and  connection  are  not  sometime 
and  somewhere,  but  always  and  everywhere  "  ; 
he  knows  that  his  fate  and  success  are  not  the 
playthings  of  chance,  but  are  emanations  of 
himself,  the  fruit  of  his  thought  and  conduct, 
and  that  all  evil  is  a  result  and  can  be  con- 
verted into  a  benefit.  (  Every  misfortune  con- 
tains a  suggestion  which,  if  wisely  apprehended, 
terminates   in    profit  and  triumph.      Persons 


Character  1 1 7 

make  their  circumstances  more  than  their  cir- 
cumstances make  them,  and  "The  soul  contains 
the  event  that  shall  befall  it ;  "  men  are  compli- 
mented on  their  positions,  but  their  merit  un- 
derlies the  position  and  should  receive  the  com- 
pliment. There  is  no  permanent  good  nor  ill 
fortune  except  of  a  man's  own  creation ;  as 
Emerson  says — "  A  man  will  see  his  character 
emitted  in  the  events  that  seem  to  meet  him, 
but  which  exude  from  and  accompany  him.'* 
The  defect  that  exists  in  a  man's  heart  or  head 
will  be  manifest  in  his  conduct;  he  cannot  act 
one  thing  and  be  another,  for  the  reality  is  dis- 
tilled in  his  most  unconscious  act  and  manner. 
A  man's  strength  must  extend  into  the  farthest 
roots  of  his  being,  else  the  first  adverse  circum- 
stance will  tear  it  out ;  he  must  be  poised  so 
that  no  tempest  can  move  him  from  his  anchor- 
age. By  the  force  of  his  character  and  the 
mastery  of  the  evils  which  beset  him,  he  should 
make  everything  conduce  to  his  strength  and 
become  his  ally.  No  man's  highest  endeavor  is 
ever  futile ;  he  must  simply  know  what  he  most 
desires,  and  working  toward  that  end  with  per- 
severance and  concentration  he  will  attain 
it.  There  must,  however,  be  no  dissipation  of 
desire  or  force  ;  he  must  not  seek  all  things, 
but  the  one  thing  on  which  he  determines  and 
toward  which  he  never  relaxes  his  effort,  he 
may   depend.      As   Goethe   says — "What  we 


li8  Child    Culture 

wish  for  all  our  lives  comes  in  heaps  on  us  in 
old  age." 

If  a  man  desire  and  strive  for  many  things, 
he  may  attain  the  many  in  a  less  degree,  but 
his  predominant  wish  will  be  best  achieved. 

An  indispensable  qualit}'  of  great  character 
is  sincerity  and  truthfulness ;  falseness  is  in- 
compatible with  any  form  of  greatness. 
Children  are  pronounced  by  unthinking  persons 
to  be  natural  falsifiers,  and  their  early  dispo- 
sition to  misstate  is  taken  as  proof  of  original 
depravity.  Children  speak  untruth  only  when 
they  have  heard  it  spoken  by  others ;  nothing  is 
more  common  than  lying  to  children.  When 
they  misbehave  they  are  promised  all  sorts  of 
things  to  conciliate  and  persuade  them  to  better 
conduct,  and  no  fulfilment  of  such  promises  is 
ever  attempted.  If  a  child  out  shopping, 
desires  confections  or  tempting  fruit  and  pleads 
or  cries  for  it,  the  mother  or  nurse  always  says, 
"  Yes,  wait  until  we  are  outside,"  or  "  Wait  until 
we  reach  another  stand,  and  I  will  buy  some," 
but  the  promised  purchase  is  not  made.  Why 
can't  parents  say  "no"  when  they  mean  no, 
and  raise  no  false  expectations  hj  soothing 
promises  and  faithless  pledges.  The  child  must 
meet  with  refusals  and  denials  in  life  and  learn 
to  submit  to  them ;  then  why  should  he  not  re- 
ceive his  lesson  and  begin  his  experience  when 
truth  demands  it.     If  parents  promise,  they 


Character  1 1 9 

should  fulfil  the  promise  at  any  cost  of  personal 
inconvenience,  that  their  child  may  not  by  their 
example  become  a  liar.  Lying  is  a  base  thing; 
while  many  practice  it  occasionally  in  some 
form,  every  man  is  so  offended  at  the  imputa- 
tion that  to  be  called  a  liar  is  an  affront  difficult 
to  be  wiped  out.  Many  who  would  scorn  to 
tell  a  lie,  do  not  decline  to  act  one,  to  deceive, 
to  willingly  create  false  impressions. 

"The  gain  of  lying,"  wrote  Sir  Walter 
Raleigh  to  his  son,"  is  not  to  be  trusted  again, 
not  to  be  believed  when  we  say  truth."  Mon- 
taigne says  of  it — "  Can  we  imagine  anything 
more  vile  than  to  be  cowards  with  regard  to 
men  and  base  with  regard  to  God." 

He  who  has  not  a  good  memory  cannot  in- 
dulge in  lying,  "For,"  says  Pope,  "he  will  be 
forced  to  invent  twenty  more  to  keep  up  the 
one." 

Children  also  speak  falsely  from  confused 
perception,  and  from  carelessness.  In  narrating 
circumstances,  if  the  child  has  not  observed 
accurately,  or  does  not  remember,  he  supplies 
the  deficiency  with  imagined  details.  He  is  not, 
until  so  instructed,  aware  of  the  imperfections 
in  his  statements ;  he  must  therefore  be  taught 
accuracy  of  observation  and  of  expression,  and 
when  he  deviates  ever  so  little  from  the  fact  as 
it  actually  occurred  his  attention  should  be 
called  to  the  defective  statement.     If  the  par- 


1 20  Child    Culture 

ents  and  the  child's  associates  appreciate  the 
value  and  beauty  of  truthfulness,  and  them- 
selves never  depart  from  its  practice,  the  child 
will  develop  no  untruthful  tendencies  in 
thought  or  speech.  Untruthfulness  is  oftener 
the  result  of  bad  example,  of  the  indifference 
of  parents  to  the  virtue,  of  imperfect  observa- 
tion and  heedlessness,  than  of  innate  depravity, 
— which  it  however  becomes  if  indulged  in 
with  impunity. 

Great  characters  are  always  replete  with 
power  of  self-direction  and  of  large  resolution. 
The  names  that  stand  forth  as  conspicuous  ex- 
amples of  these  attributes  in  our  own  country, 
Benjamin  Franklin,  Washington,  Grant  and 
Lincoln,  though  they  were  of  different  charac- 
teristics, held  in  common  a  great  determining 
power.  Franklin  was  perhaps  the  most  con- 
scious of  this  group — he  more  directly  sought 
the  growth  of  his  virtues,  and  he  tells  us  in  his 
autobiography  how  he  practiced  what  he  deemed 
his  most  necessary  virtue  exclusively  for  a  time 
until  he  felt  he  had  acquired  that  one,  and  then 
he  proceeded  to  the  next ;  how  he  daily  made 
self-examinations  to  ascertain  the  degree  of 
progress  he  was  making.  He  ascribes  to  Tem- 
perance his  long  continued  health  and  a  good 
constitution ;  to  Industry  and  Frugality  the 
early  easiness  of  his  circumstances  and  the  ac- 
quisition of  his  fortune  with  all  that  enabled 


Character  12 1 

him  to  be  a  useful  citizen ;  to  Sincerity  and 
Justice,  the  confidence  of  his  country  and  the 
honorable  employs  it  conferred  upon  him ;  and 
to  the  joint  influence  of  the  whole  mass  of  the 
virtues  even  in  the  imperfect  state  he  was  able 
to  acquire  them,  all  that  evenness  of  temper 
and  that  cheerfulness  in  conversation  which 
made  his  company  sought  and  agreeable  even 
to  his  younger  acquaintance. 

Grant's  predominant  trait  was  perhaps  his 
power  of  heroic  resolution  and  his  perseverance 
in  executing  it.  Lincoln's  power  of  self-gov- 
ernment was  the  trait  that  gave  him  such  power 
over  others,  but  the  salient,  most  admirable 
feature  of  his  great  character  was  his  deter- 
mination never  to  shirk  a  responsibility;  he 
was  always  ready  to  recognize  and  accept  his 
duty,  and  to  take  the  blame  for  any  part  that 
was  unfulfilled  or  that  miscarried. 

Through  Shakespeare's  characters  we  learn 
that  men  are  touched  only  by  the  external  good  or 
evil  that  has  a  responsive  chord  in  their  breasts. 

It  is  the  ambition  latent  in  Macbeth  that  was 
touched  into  action  by  the  prophecies  of  the 
witches ;  and  the  still  greater  ambition  of  Lady 
Macbeth  which  held  him  to  the  fulfilment  of 
the  deed.  The  witches  represent  the  tempta- 
tion, which,  however,  makes  no  appeal  to  a  man 
except  at  the  point  of  his  existing  weakness. 
In  all  Shakespeare's  plays  the  tragedies  are  the 


122  Child    Culture 

results  of  the  incompleteness  of  man's  charac- 
ter, his  letting  the  lower  forces  of  being  occupy 
the  places  that  the  higher  forces  should  occuj)y. 
So  in  man's  life,  his  incompleteness  results  in 
soul  tragedies,  though  they  may  not  prove 
tragedies  before  the  world. 

In  Hamlet,  we  have  the  lesson  of  the  sin  of 
omission;  all  the  graces  of  heart  and  mind 
slip  through  the  grasp  of  an  infirm  purpose. 
The  sin  of  omission  may  be  as  fatal  as  the  sin 
of  commission ;  it  is  as  evil  not  to  do  the  work 
man  feels  called  upon  to  do  as  to  make  a  false 
step.  One  must  call  forth  all  the  powers  of 
being  for  right  doing  as  well  as  for  resistance 
of  evil,  and  weakness  becomes  sin  unless  one 
uses  human  and  superhuman  effort  to  resist  it. 

Power  is  the  supreme  test  of  a  man's  char- 
acter ;  it  is  easy  for  the  weak  to  be  gentle,  for 
the  man  in  adversity  to  be  meek,  but  when  a 
man  becomes  prosperous  and  forceful  he  reveals 
his  true  nature. 

Activity,  sobriety,  justice,  energy  and  love  of 
humanity  are  indispensable  qualities  of  a  great 
character. 

The  value  of  great  men  lies  not  alone  in 
their  direct  accomplishments — not  so  much  in 
what  they  do  as  in  what  they  are  and  the 
strength  which  they  supply  their  fellows.  One 
Howard  purifies  the  prisons  of  the  world ;  one 
Hampden  strengthens  a  whole  nation. 


Character  123 

Decision  of  mind  is  found  a  prime  charac- 
teristic of  all  great  men,  and  many  otherwise 
good  and  noble  men  fail  all  through  life  from 
lack  of  resolution  to  plan,  and  courage  to 
firmly  execute  a  course  of  action.  This  power 
requires  a  union  of  calm  judgment,  moral  cour- 
age and  unvarying  purpose.  Weak  vacillation 
of  purpose  may  arise  from  lack  of  self-confi- 
dence, from  too  great  caution,  or  from  strong 
and  varying  impulse.  The  first  should  consider 
that  it  is  better  for  a  man  to  err  in  judgment 
sometimes  than  to  go  through  life  in  trepida- 
tion and  hesitation.  The  man  who  is  swayed 
by  his  feelings  should  delay  judgment  in  mo- 
ments of  impulse.  The  early  education  should 
train  the  child  to  abstain  from  speech  and  ac- 
tion in  periods  of  intense  feeling  and  of  fever- 
ish excitement. 

Strength  of  character  gives  a  man  the  power 
to  detach  himself  from  his  deed  when  finished 
and  from  his  decision  when  reached.  He  will 
consider  the  question  in  all  its  bearings,  weigh 
various  suggestions,  and  listen  to  the  opinion 
of  others,  but  it  is  most  important  that  he  form 
his  own  decisions.  After  full  enlightenment 
and  due  deliberation,  the  conclusions  to  which 
he  is  compelled  should  be  final,  and  he  should 
learn  to  rest  on  them.  Many  persons  utterly 
lack  this  ability,  but  continually  perplex  them- 
selves by  retraversing  the  same  ground  and 


124  Child    Culture 

reconsidering  the  same  question.  The  power 
to  finally  settle  and  dismiss  questions  which 
demand  self-sacrifice,  and  the  refusal  to  revise 
present  decisions  is  a  supreme  test  of  a  man's 
strength  of  character,  and  it  is  a  great  economy 
to  the  mind  and  heart.  A  man  should  reflect 
on  his  past  actions,  and  indeed  cannot  divorce 
himself  from  their  consequences,  but  it  is  use- 
less to  waste  one's  thought  and  feeling  revising 
one's  best  decisions. 

The  self-confidence  which  enables  one  to  ac- 
cept one's  own  decisions  has  allied  to  it  the 
danger  of  overvaluing  one's  own  judgments. 
Self-confidence  may  exist  with  a  truly  humble 
mind  and  heart.  Was  Mr.  Disraeli  conceited 
when  he  said  that  the  house  of  commons  would 
one  day  listen  to  him  ?  A  man  who  is  conscious 
of  his  own  integrity,  high  motives,  and  earnest 
endeavor  may  feel  and  express  a  confidence  in 
the  ultimate  result  of  his  desires  which  they 
who  do  not  recognize  them,  cannot  appreciate. 
Such  confidence  may  be  the  sole  consolation 
and  support  of  a  brave  and  noble  mind  in  an 
hour  of  temporary  defeat.  Courage  and  pluck 
should  command  high  admiration.  Napoleon 
said  of  the  English  that  they  did  not  know 
when  they  were  beaten.  This  is  sometimes  an 
advantage,  and  one  which  all  great  nations  and 
great  individuals  have  experienced. 

There  is,  however,  an  egotism  that  renders  a 


Character  1 25 

man  unteachable  and  incapable  of  melioration, 
for  it  leads  him  to  think  himself  already  suffi- 
ciently perfect. 

Some  men  of  great  character  have  had  this 
self-pride  in  an  inordinate  degree,  but  the 
greatest  minds  have  been  humble  and  willing 
to  receive  instruction  from  any  true  source. 
Emerson  says :  "  Every  man  I  meet  is  my 
master  in  some  point  and  can  instruct  me 
therein  ;  "  this  attitude  renders  one  receptive  to 
all  the  good  and  wisdom  one  meets,  and  is  an 
important  condition  of  self-improvement. 

The  rude  experience  which  contact  with  the 
world  brings  a  man,  usually  rubs  down  the 
salient  angularities  of  his  own  importance  and 
subdues  his  conceit  to  the  point  of  its  benefits. 
In  the  formation  of  a  virtuous  character,  a  man 
must  constantly  steer  between  the  Scylla  of 
his  virtues  in  exaggeration,  and  the  Charybdis 
of  their  allied  vices,  but  he  must  not  let  this 
necessity  paralyze  him. 

The  activity  of  brain,  the  effort  to  do  and  not 
to  wrap  one's  talent  in  a  napkin  and  bury  it, 
but  to  put  it  out  to  usury,  has  been  a  feature  of 
all  great  men. 

*'  No  matter  how  full  a  reservoir  of  maxims 
one  may  possess  and  no  matter  how  good  one's 
SENTIMENTS  may  be,  if  one  has  not  taken  advan- 
tage of  every  concrete  opportunity  to  act,  one's 
character  may  remain  entirely  unaffected  for 


126  Child    Culture 

the  better.  With  men's  good  intentions,  hell 
is  proverbially  paved.  A  "character,"  as  J.  S. 
Mills  says,  "  is  a  completely  fashioned  will ;  " 
and  a  will,  in  the  sense  in  which  he  means  it, 
is  an  aggregate  of  tendencies  to  act  in  a  firm, 
prompt  and  definite  way  in  all  the  principal 
emergencies  of  life.  A  tendency  to  act  only 
becomes  effectually  ingrained  in  us  in  propor- 
tion to  the  uninterrupted  frequency  with  which 
the  actions  take  place,  and  the  brain  grows  to 
their  use.  When  a  resolve  or  a  fine  glow  of 
feeling  is  allowed  to  evaporate  without  bearing 
practical  fruit,  it  is  worse  than  a  chance  lost ; 
it  works  so  as  positively  to  hinder  future  reso- 
lutions and  emotions  from  taking  the  normal 
path  of  discharge. 

"There  is  no  more  contemptible  type  of 
human  character  than  that  of  the  nerveless 
sentimentalist  and  dreamer,  who  spends  his  life 
in  a  weltering  sea  of  sensibility  and  emotion, 
but  who  never  does  a  manly  concrete  deed. 
Rousseau,  inflaming  by  his  eloquence  all  the 
mothers  of  France  to  follow  nature  and  nurse 
their  babies  themselves,  while  he  sends  his  own 
children  to  the  foundling  hospital,  is  a  classical 
example  of  what  I  mean.  But  every  one  of  us 
in  his  measure,  whenever,  after  glowing  for  an 
abstractly  formulated  good,  he  practically  ig- 
nores some  actual  case  among  the  squalid 
"other  particulars"  among  which  that   same 


Character  127 

good  lurks  disguised,  treads  straight  in  Rous- 
seau's path.  All  good  is  disguised  by  the  vul- 
garity of  its  concomitants  in  this  workaday 
world  ;  but  woe  to  him  who  can  recognize  them 
only  when  he  thinks  of  them  in  their  own  pure 
and  abstract  form. 

"  The  habit  of  excessive  novel  reading  and 
theatre  going  will  produce  true  monsters  in  this 
line.  The  weeping  of  the  Russian  lady  over 
the  fictitious  personages  in  the  play,  while  her 
coachman  is  freezing  to  death  outside,  is  the 
sort  of  thing  that  everywhere  happens  on  a 
less  glaring  scale.  One  becomes  filled  with 
emotions  which  habitually  pass  without  prompt- 
ing to  any  deed,  and  so  the  inertly  sentimental 
condition  is  kept  up.  The  remedy  would  be 
never  to  suffer  oneself  to  have  an  emotion 
without  expressing  it  afterward  in  some  active 
way.  Let  the  expression  be  the  least  thing  in 
the  world — speaking  genially  to  one's  grand- 
mother, or  giving  up  one's  seat  in  a  horse  car, 
if  nothing  more  heroic  offers — but  let  it  not  fail 
to  take  place. 

"  Just  as  we  let  our  emotions  evaporate  they 
get  in  a  way  of  evaporating,  so  there  is  no  rea- 
son to  suppose  that  if  we  often  flinch  from  mak- 
ing an  effort,  before  we  know  it,  the  effort-mak- 
ing capacity  will  be  gone."  ^ 

Neither  good  will,  fine  emotions  nor   right 

^ Prof,  William  James;  "Psychology,"  p.  147. 


128  Child    Culture 

feeling  avail  unless  a  man  realizes  on  them,  and 
this  realization  has  been  a  mark  of  all  the  great 
characters  to  whom  the  world  has  given  recog- 
nition. 


CULTURE 

Bacon's  oft  quoted  saying  that  "  Knowledge 
is  power  "  has  been  usually  interpreted  as  mean- 
ing that  knowledge  is  a  beneficent  power.  It 
may  be  a  power  for  good,  and  it  may  be  as  surely 
a  power  for  evil,  for  there  is  no  connection  be- 
tween perfect  familiarity  with  facts  and  an  ap- 
preciation of  the  great  principles  of  life. 
Knowledge  of  what  is  good  and  what  is  evil 
avails  nothing  unless  supported  by  the  wisdom 
to  follow  the  one  and  to  avoid  the  other.  Hux- 
ley says  :  "  If  I  am  a  knave  or  a  fool,  teaching 
me  to  write  and  read  won't  make  me  less  of 
either  the  one  or  the  other,  unless  somebody 
shows  me  how  to  put  my  reading  and  writing 
to  wise  and  good  purposes."  But  add  wisdom 
and  moral  apprehension  to  the  mental  faculties, 
and  we  have  the  power  of  virtue  and  the  begin- 
ning of  culture. 

That  education  does  not  culminate  in  virtue 
is  sadly  exemplified  by  the  moral  standard  of 
some  of  the  best  educated  people,  lawyers,  phy- 
sicians, preachers,  different  professions,  whose 
members  we  find  in  the  daily  records  of  ras- 
cality, and  above  all  the  politicians,  whose 
129 


130  Child    Culture 

names  have  become  almost  synonymous  with 
moral  corruption.  Education  bears  fruit  only 
where  it  is  planted  ;  if  it  is  sown  in  the  mental 
field  alone,  it  reaps  only  in  the  mental ;  if  it  is 
sown  in  the  physical  field,  it  will  be  reaped 
only  in  the  physical.  The  professional  man's 
education  may  not  extend  beyond  the  nar- 
rowest professional  requirements,  and  in  such 
case  bears  no  fruit  in  any  other  direction. 
There  must  be  the  harmonious  training  of  all 
the  faculties  to  make  acquired  knowledge  effica- 
cious for  good. 

Parkes  speaks  wisely  when  he  says :  "  The 
positive  things  which  we  chiefly  need  are  first 
education,  next  education,  and  the  next  educa- 
tion, a  vigorous  development  of  the  mind,  the 
conscience,  of  the  affections;  to  assume  that 
any  amount  of  intellectual  education  will  pro- 
duce rectitude  without  a  parallel  education  of 
the  moral  sense  is  a  blunder ;  in  the  union  of 
the  two  we  have  wisdom.  Wisdom  has  been 
well  defined  as  "learning  transformed  to  fac- 
ulty," that  is  a  fusion  of  knowledge,  intellect 
and  morality,  and  he  who  blends  these  may  be- 
come a  cultured  man ;  but  it  must  be  admitted 
that  the  moral  sentiment  is  the  basis  of  true 
culture. 

Culture  does  not  consist  in  a  large  accumula- 
tion of  knowledge,  nor  in  profound  learning, 
though  they  serve  it  with  nourishment,  but  it- 


Culture  131 

self  is  an  unfolding  of  the  human  spirit,  and  has 
more  relation  to  quality  than  to  quantity  of 
knowledge. 

It  comes  not  by  additions  from  without,  but 
is  a  development  from  within  ;  it  is  not  the  re- 
sult of  scholarship,  but  of  growth,  and  is  re- 
vealed in  the  ripe  sound  nature  it  bestows.  A 
man  may  have  vast  knowledge  and  remain 
without  cultivation,  or  he  may  have  a  little 
knowledge  and  a  great  deal  of  cultivation.  To 
be  cultured  is  to  absorb  what  one  knows  until 
the  heart  and  mind  are  saturated  with  it,  until 
it  is  a  part  of  one,  and  one's  whole  nature  is 
matured  by  it.  The  green  fruit  and  the  ripe 
fruit  are  of  the  same  substance,  but  what  a 
difference  in  the  flavor  of  the  two ;  the  same 
difference  distinguishes  the  cultured  and  the 
uncultured  man.  The  cult  is  one  of  slow 
growth,  and  cannot  be  forced  without  loss  of 
flavor,  but  grows  steadily  in  the  man  who  is  re- 
ceptive to  its  quality.  To  be  a  source  of  cul- 
ture knowledge  should  be  transformed  into  per- 
sonality, and  should  not  only  refresh  but  also 
enrich  the  man's  nature. 

The  pedant's  knowledge  goes  no  further  than 
his  mind ;  that  of  the  cultured  man  enters  his 
soul.  It  is  the  result  of  profound  thought  and 
of  imagination,  of  a  perfect  assimilation  of  his 
facts,  and  such  intimacy  with  them  that  they 
are  incorporated  with  his  mind.     The  pedant  is 


132  Child    Culture 

full  of  facts  which  he  does  not  absorb,  lacking 
the  receptive  heart  which  would  enable  him  to 
do  so.  It  is  only  by  meditation  on  the  vital  re- 
lation of  the  elements  of  a  man's  knowledge,  by 
connecting  them  with  his  soul  that  they  become 
thoroughly  his  own.  The  value  of  his  culture 
depends  on  the  character  of  his  reveries;  if 
they  are  on  high  and  noble  themes  they  enrich 
his  mind;  if  on  idle  and  insignificant  affairs, 
the  profit  is  small.  But  man  can  control  his 
meditations,  and  though  they  are  largely  un- 
conscious they  can  also  be  largely  directed  to 
worthy  subjects.  The  training  of  one's  mind 
to  dwell  on  great  things  instead  of  wasting  it- 
self in  idle  reverie  is  one  of  the  most  fruitful 
sources  of  culture.  Another  deep  source  is  the 
contact  with  rich  personalities ;  nothing  is  more 
educative  than  association  with  persons  of  high 
intelligence ;  he  who  has  such  opportunity  gains 
a  high  interpretation  of  life  which  illumines  and 
expands  his  own. 

By  contact  with  great  ideas  the  individual 
mind  puts  itself  in  touch  with  the  universal 
mind  which  broadens  and  enriches  it.  Culture 
is  based  on  ideas  rather  than  on  knowledge,  the 
latter  being  valuable  to  it  in  providing  material 
for  its  development.  It  is  at  once  the  highest 
product  of  education,  and  the  test  of  its  power; 
by  it,  man  puts  himself  into  heart  relations 
with  the  movements  he  is  trying  to  understand; 


Culture  133 

to  comprehend  thoroughly  persons  or  situations 
one  must  pass  beyond  their  mental  attitude  into 
the  heart  of  them. 

A  salient  characteristic  of  the  man  of  culture 
is  his  breadth ;  he  is  by  his  superior  develop- 
ment delivered  from  a  narrow  horizon,  a  re- 
stricted world,  and  becomes  a  citizen  of  the 
Universe ;  such  men  do  not  accept  local  ex- 
periences and  standards  for  universal  experience 
and  standards,  the  mistake  which  the  unculti- 
vated man  makes  ;  the  former  takes  a  wide  sur- 
vey and  his  experience  gives  him.  poise  and  bal- 
ance. By  its  wider  knowledge  and  clearer 
vision  culture  destroys  philistinism  to  the  core 
and  all  other  '  isms '  except  altruism. 

Another  essential  is  genuineness,  sincerity  of 
purpose.  The  man  of  culture  must  feel  sin- 
cerely, must  appreciate  truly  the  truths  he 
elevates.  He  who  is  only  playing  a  part,  who 
wishes  merely  to  shine  before  men,  who  is  not 
frank — only  vain,  is  soon  revealed  to  the  gen- 
uine man.  The  latter  does  not  mistake  the 
veneer  for  the  real  article ;  the  latter  consists 
in  though tfulness  of  others,  generosity,  mod- 
esty, self-respect,  true  grace,  and  graciousness 
of  manner,  all  of  which  are  truer  tests  than 
knowledge  of  books,  mental  accomplishments 
or  any  artificial  acquirement.  It  is  not  much 
more  difficult  to  be  than  to  pretend;  if  the 
pretender  made  as  great  effort  to  secure  the 


134  Child    Culture 

reality  as  lie  exerts  in  the  make  believe,  the 
semblance  would  be  unnecessary. 

Culture  has  its  root  in  egotism.  We  seldom 
find  a  cultured  man,  who  has  not  a  strong  ego, 
a  strong  individuality,  and  it  is  this  which  has 
secured  him  his  mental  advancement.  The  de- 
sire to  make  self  a  worthy  self,  an  enlightened 
self,  gives  the  man  the  determination  which  is 
necessary  for  the  effort  and  accomplishment. 
Then,  a  man  needs  a  large  ego,  that  he  may  not 
be  lost  in  his  books  and  arts,  that  he  may  ac- 
quire them  and  not  they  acquire  him.  Culture 
does  not  destroy  his  egotism,  but  trains  away  the 
unhealthy  elements,  those,  which  if  entertained 
would  prove  a  distemper,  and  preserves  what  is 
necessary  to  sustain  individual  persistence. 

Though  generated  and  propelled  by  self-love, 
culture  should  not  and  does  not  result  in  it. 
It  widens  a  man's  horizon,  it  enlarges  the  scope 
of  his  intellect  so  that  he  can  take  a  just  esti- 
mate of  himself,  and  that  estimate  is  humility. 
Egotism,  therefore,  exists  as  a  cardinal  neces- 
sity, but  must  not  be  indulged  beyond  its 
legitimate  purpose.  A  man  who  lives  on  the 
circumference  of  himself.  His  ideas,  his  fine 
points,  HIS  possessions  and  circumstances  is  not 
admirable.  There  is  a  limit  to  the  interest 
which  a  man's  personal  affairs,  private  history 
has  for  another,  to  say  nothing  of  the  very  bad 
taste  of  making  his  affairs,  accomplishments, 


Culture  135 

talents  and  achievements  paramount  in  every 
conversation.  Egotism  is  not  a  product  of 
culture,  and  having  served  as  a  valuable  ad- 
junct, should  be  whipped  into  the  background. 
The  cultivated  man's  views  are  impersonal, 
catholic,  unrelated  to  self ;  he  sees  freely  and 
without  prejudice,  and  has  larger  sources  of 
conversation  than  himself  and  his  neighbors. 

Emerson  says :  "  Incapacity  of  melioration 
is  the  only  mortal  distemper.  There  are  people 
who  can  never  understand  any  second  or  ex- 
panded sense  given  to  your  words,  or  any  hu- 
mor, but  remain  literalists  after  hearing  music, 
poetry,  rhetoric  and  art  for  seventy  or  eighty 
years.  They  are  past  the  hope  of  surgeon  or 
clergy.  But  even  they  can  understand  pitch- 
forks and  the  cry  of  *  fire  ! '  and  I  have  noticed 
in  some  of  this  class  a  marked  dislike  to  earth- 
quakes." Culture  presupposes  a  fertile,  capa- 
cious soil.  There  are  some  substances  that 
cannot  be  wrought  or  moulded,  ("  one  cannot 
make  a  statue  out  of  punk  '*),  and  there  are 
minds  that  admit  of  little  culture  or  improve- 
ment. However,  because  a  soil  will  not  grow 
all  things,  it  need  not  be  deserted. 


" But  if  my  lot  be  sand  where  nothing  grows? '' 

*'  Nay,  who  hath  said  it  ?    Tune  a  thankful  psalm, 
For,  though  thy  desert  bloom  not  as  the  rose, 
It  yet  can  rear  thy  palm." 


136  Child    Culture 

Open  to  the  growing  youth  the  delights  of 
the  intellect,  the  joys  of  thought,  imagination, 
truth  and  beauty,  and  you  emancipate  him 
from  the  slavery  of  his  lower  nature.  Culture 
is  an  antiseptic  for  materialism.  "  For  the 
young  woman  who  has  learned  to  find  pleasure 
in  the  great  souls  of  the  earth,"  says  Heber 
Newton,  "  the  garish  glory  of  Vanity  Fair  will 
pale  with  the  cheap  tinsel  and  appear  like  the 
spangled  splendors  of  the  stage  when  the  gas  is 
turned  off  and  the  daylight  steals  in  upon  the 
scene.  Let  a  young  man  realize  how  much 
solid  pleasure  he  can  find  in  books,  and  he  will 
apprise  stocks  and  bonds  on  a  lower  scale  than 
that  quoted  in  the  exchanges." 

Books,  as  the  records  of  human  thoughts, 
are  leading  factors  in  the  cultivation  of  the 
mind.  One's  opinion  gains  in  weight  as  one 
has  knowledge  of  many  opinions,  and  culture  is 
familiarity  with  the  best  thought  of  the  world. 

The  great  books  of  the  world  perceive  and 
interpret  the  life  of  the  world  ;  they  are  our 
most  constant  teachers  because  they  contain 
the  most  complete  experience  of  the  thought, 
acts,  and  passions  of  mankind.  They  bring  the 
past  out  of  its  grave,  and  bring  us  in  vital  con- 
tact with  it  and  its  experiences. 

The  great  literary  Bibles  of  Homer,  Dante, 
Goethe  and  Shakespeare  have  the  universal 
element  which  connects  them  with  all  time  and 


Culture  137 

all  places,  which  is  the  essential  of  all  great 
books  and  the  feature  which  renders  them  im- 
mortal. To  read  for  culture  one  must  get  at 
the  heart  of-  books,  must  live  with  them  and  in 
them,  meditate  on  them  and  view  the  contents 
from  various  sides.  By  such  assimilation  only 
are  one's  soul  and  mind  enriched  by  them. 

Books  are  of  value  to  a  child  only  when  he 
is  ready  for  them,  when  his  faculties  of  per- 
ception and  observation  are  well  developed  to 
the  point  of  assimilation.  In  his  early  years 
his  playmates,  his  games,  his  everyday  life  are 
his  best  instructors.  Children  are  not  ani- 
mated vessels  to  be  pumped  into  ad  libitum ; 
their  consciousness,  their  power  of  realization 
is  at  first  very  weak  and  not  capable  of  grasp- 
ing abstract  thoughts.  Let  the  hands  touch, 
the  ears  hear,  the  eyes  see  as  much  as  possible 
what  the  brain  is  to  know.  Bridge  the  chasm 
between  the  abstract  and  the  concrete,  and  let 
the  child  read  nothing,  recite  nothing  in  ad- 
vance of  his  perfect  understanding.  Only 
knowledge  and  ideas  which  we  have  fully  real- 
ized and  comprehended  nourish  the  mind  ;  the 
others  make  no  impression  or  produce  mental 
dyspepsia.  A  child  that  is  crammed  with  facts 
unrelated  to  his  experience,  never  develops  a 
taste  for  knowledge ;  a  healthy  instinct  rebels 
against  receiving  that  which  it  cannot  digest. 
A  boy  always  enjoys  and  makes  greater  strides 


138  Child    Culture 

in  the  studies  which  as  he  expresses  it  "  he  sees 
the  good  of ;  "  he  is  by  nature  eager  to  know, 
but  this  desire  is  often  rendered  passive  by 
forcing  him  prematurely.  He  is  perfectly  will- 
ing to  wear  the  clothes  that  fit  him,  or  which 
he  feels  may  ever  fit  him,  but  he  rebels  against 
working  for  those  that  are  not  shaped  for  him, 
and  to  which  he  will  never  grow. 

A  man  of  deep  culture  is  a  citizen  of  the 
world,  and  his  craving  for  the  deeper  experi- 
ence and  wider  knowledge  which  travel  affords 
is  the  result  of  this  citizenship.  A  well  poised 
intelligently  directed  life,  stands  both  in  local 
and  universal  relations  and  is  thereby  rendered 
vital,  rich,  and  broad.  Travel  as  a  means  of 
culture  is  advantageous  only  to  those  who  have 
mental  equipment  for  it ;  it  is  robbed  of  half  its 
educational  value  unless  one  carries  with  him  a 
knowledge  of  what  he  is  to  see,  and  in  propor- 
tion to  that  knowledge  is  his  mind  enriched. 
No  American  abroad  sees  in  what  he  beholds 
more  than  he  carries  in  his  memory  and  imagi- 
nation. What  can  Westminster  Abbey  signify 
to  the  man  who  is  ignorant  of  the  biographies 
of  its  memorials;  or  Venice  and  Florence,  to 
one  who  knows  not  their  past?  One  who  knows 
and  understands  the  life  and  art  of  the  past,  even 
though  he  see  not  their  visible  records  has  more 
culture  than  he  who  sees  but  comprehends 
them  not. 


Culture  139 

A  mark  of  the  man  of  culture  is  his  absence 
of  pretension.  The  more  real  value  a  man  has 
the  less  he  cares  about  an  exhibition  of  it.  To 
the  unitiated  man  appearances  are  all ;  if  you 
show  no  appreciation  of  him,  he  forces  your  at- 
tentions by  boasting  of  his  eminence  in  some 
direction  ;  he  promises  much,  and  the  one  ob- 
ject of  his  life  is  to  be  conspicuous.  Boys  and 
girls  who  have  been  brought  up  with  well-in- 
formed people  show  in  their  manner  an  un- 
speakable grace ;  they  are  retiring,  modest,  self- 
respecting  ;  promise  little  and  perform  much, 
and  possess  that  repose  of  manner  which  is  the 
badge  of  the  perfect  lady  and  gentleman.  Self- 
command,  cheerfulness  and  perfect  repose  are 
the  great  elegances  of  the  best  society.  All 
that  adds  sweetness  and  polish  to  society,  that 
softens  the  asperities  of  life,  discloses  a  civiliza- 
tion in  flower. 

Every  nature  has  in  its  depths  a  fund  of  en- 
thusiasm which  seeks  expansion,  and  the  object 
of  education  should  be  to  direct  this  to  worthy 
objects — the  good  and  the  beautiful. 

Art  is  the  expression  of  the  culture  of  the 
imagination  through  the  artist's  personality.  It 
contains  the  thought  and  life  of  the  race  to 
which  it  belongs,  the  last  results  of  its  experi- 
ences. "  The  interpretations  of  life  which  the 
Greek,  the  Roman  and  Hebrew  races  have  left 
us  are  revelations  of  their  character  and  life ; 


140  Child    Culture 

they  symbolize  their  highest  thoughts,  the  deep- 
est feeling,  the  most  searching  experience,  the 
most  strenuous  activity  of  these  races.  In  them 
are  experienced  and  represented  the  inner  and 
essential  life  of  each  race,  in  them  the  soul  of 
the  older  world  survives."  These  interpreta- 
tions constitute  in  their  highest  forms  the  su- 
preme art  of  the  world  and  are  the  richest  educa- 
tional material  accessible  to  man.  Every  cul- 
tured person  is  at  least  an  interpreter  and 
appreciator  of  art,  admires  expressions  of  the 
beautiful,  and  should  be  capable  of  imagining 
beautiful  and  graceful  things.  Because  art  is  a 
product  of  the  imagination  it  can  also  be  a  pro- 
ducer of  it ;  one  who  is  lacking  in  imagination 
can  find  no  better  school  for  its  development 
than  the  study  of  works  of  art. 

Poetry  expresses  the  relation  of  form  to  emo- 
tion and  thought, "  the  spirit  of  things,"  "  the  in- 
finite in  things,"  and  is  within  the  scope  of  the 
youngest  and  of  the  ripest  minds.  In  this 
scientific  age  there  is  danger  of  utilitarianism 
drawing  into  its  vortex  all  the  intellectual  life 
and  interest ;  let  us  not  permit  it ;  let  us  instil 
into  our  youth  an  appreciation  of  the  beautiful 
as  well  as  of  the  useful.  Help  them  to  know 
and  to  understand  the  poetry,  to  which  at  some 
periods  of  life  we  delight  to  return,  sometimes 
for  soothing  in  sorrow,  sometimes  for  stimulus 
to  hope. 


Culture  141 

In  young  people  appeal  must  be  made  to  the 
heart  and  imagination  before  addressing  the  in- 
tellect. The  child  feels  its  mother's  love  before 
it  has  any  intellectual  conception  of  what  love 
is ;  her  gentleness  and  tenderness  are  the  poe- 
try of  its  young  life.  Life  is  full  of  poetry,  if 
we  only  apprehend  it. 

Beautiful  pictures  full  of  sense  and  sentiment 
are  valuable  means  for  instructing  the  child's 
taste  and  poetic  understanding.  JEsthetic  qual- 
ities are  transmitted  from  generation  to  genera- 
tion, and  should  be  regarded  as  a  precious 
heritage,  to  be  fostered  and  developed  where 
they  exist,  and  to  be  created  where  they  do  not. 

A  desire  for  artistic  enjoyment  exists  in  some 
degree  in  all  human  beings ;  it  is  a  legitimate 
craving  and  should  be  gratified.  Uncultivated 
persons  are  better  pleased  with  a  flaring  daub 
than  with  a  fine  engraving,  with  the  rhythm  of 
dance  music  than  with  sublime  song  and  ora- 
torio ;  they  understand  the  one  and  do  not  the 
other;  the  taste  needs  refining  and  educating. 
The  conditions  which  made  Greek  art  were  the 
education  of  an  art-appreciating  public  as  well 
as  of  art-producing  artists.  Art  gives  to  the 
mind  pure  ideals; — Goethe,  Ruskin  and  Tolstoi 
have  claimed  a  close  connection  between  artis- 
tic and  moral  beauty ;  in  both  are  expressed  a 
sense  of  the  perfect,  the  harmonious,  the  ideal. 

Works  of  art  that  are  simple,  healthy  and 

/#^L  ^'^^^^^ 

I  XJNIVEKSITY  \ 


142  Child    Culture 

elevating  should  be  placed  within  the  reach  of 
all.  "If  it  is  true,"  says  a  French  writer,  "that 
the  imagination  of  children,  and  especially  of 
the  children  of  the  masses  is  always  more  de- 
veloped than  their  reasoning  powers,  does  it  not 
follow,  not  merely  that  a  place  that  it  does  not 
at  present  occupy  should  be  awarded  to  the 
cultivation  of  the  imagination,  but  that  such 
culture  should  take  the  most  prominent  posi- 
tion in  primary  education."  He  also  says, — 
**  Beauty  is  the  watchword  of  the  Universe ; 
beauty  should  be  the  watchword  of  education." 
It  is  of  great  importance  that  every  nascent 
faculty  be  developed,  and  toward  this  develop- 
ment is  the  trend  of  modern  education,  which 
is  however  not  yet  perfected.  Drawing  is  often 
made  dull  and  uninteresting  to  children  by  the 
constant  copying  of  technical  objects,  when 
their  taste  is  to  give  expression  to  their  own 
imagination.  Drudgery  and  routine  work  are 
essential,  of  course,  but  if  the  child  learns  only 
to  copy  he  will  never  acquire  creative  power, 
but  be  an  imitator  all  his  life. 

Art  and  music  interpret  and  embellish  life, 
are  a  relaxation  from  material  care,  have  an 
elevating  influence  on  the  character  beside  the 
genuine  pleasure  they  afford.  An  appreciation 
of  both  should  be  a  part  of  every  child's  educa- 
tion. By  excluding  trash,  and  securing  to  it 
views  of  superior  pictures,  statues  that  are  full 


Culture  143 

of  grace  and  symbol^  much  may  be  done  toward 
forming  a  correct  taste  even  in  childhood. 

In  our  tastes  we  reveal  our  characters ;  if  we 
did  not,  they  would  not  be  tastes  but  instincts. 
When  you  enter  a  stranger's  house  you  can  tell 
by  the  furnishing  what  manner  of  man  he  is, 
and  just  as  truly  does  one's  apparel  reveal  the 
degree  of  refinement  of  the  wearer. 


XI 

LANGUAGE  AND  LITERATURE 

There  has  been  recently  organized  in  New 
York  City  a  "  Society  for  the  Improvement  of 
American  Speech,"  the  object  of  which,  as  the 
name  indicates,  is  to  urge  a  purer,  richer,  more 
correct  use  of  the  mother  tongue.  The  neces- 
sity of  some  effort  to  awaken  an  appreciation 
of  the  importance  and  value  of  grammatically 
correct  and  well  selected  language  for  the  ex- 
pression of  thought,  has  at  last  impressed  itself 
on  a  few  earnest  persons,  and  the  consideration 
is  a  worthy  one. 

A  striking  weakness  of  the  English  language 
as  used  in  this  country  is  its  extreme  poverty, 
the  very  limited  vocabulary  that  belongs  to  the 
average  boy  and  girl.  Everything  that  satis- 
fies the  boy's  physical,  mental  or  moral  taste 
is  "  fine ; "  everything  that  dissatisfies  it  is 
"rank."  With  girls,  every  quality  of  excel- 
lence is  expressed  in  "  splendid  "  or  "  elegant " 
and  the  reverse  is  "horrid;"  between  a  well 
rendered  opera  and  an  ice  cream  soda  there  is 
no  distinction ;  they  and  all  their  intermediates 
are  "elegant."  The  inherent  quality  of  an 
article  is  never  analyzed  to  ascertain  its  true 
144 


Language  and  Literature  145' 

distinction  and  really  to  define  it,  but  the  gen- 
eral nomination  of  "  splendid  "  is  supposed  to 
convey  the  fullest  description.  The  elderly 
principal  of  a  "  Young  Ladies'  Seminary  "  arose 
in  a  meeting  of  the  society  before  mentioned 
and  told  of  the  difficulties  he  had  experienced 
in  his  efforts  to  enrich  the  vocabulary  of  the 
pupils  of  his  seminary.  He  said  he  had  once 
shown  a  young  girl  a  picture  of  the  "  Falls  of 
Lodore,"  and  asked  her  what  she  thought  of 
them ;  she  said  they  were  "  very  pretty ; "  he 
asked  her  if  that  was  all  she  could  think  to  say 
of  them;  she  replied,  "Yes,  that  is  all;  they 
are  very  pretty ;  "  whereupon  the  old  gentle- 
man gave  the  eloquent,  characteristic  descrip- 
tion of  the  falls  with  which  we  are  all  familiar. 
It  was  most  striking, — the  contrast  of  that  lit- 
tle girl's  poor  "pretty,"  with  the  flow  of  words 
and  glowing  description  that  followed. 

It  is  not  only  desirable  to  have  words 
promptly  at  command,  but  one  should  en- 
deavor to  find  the  word  that  best  conveys  the 
meaning. 

Benjamin  Franklin,  in  his  "  Autobiography," 
tells  us  that  when  he  discovered  his  need  of  a 
larger  vocabulary,  he  took  some  of  the  tales  of 
the  "  Spectator  "  and  turned  them  into  verse, 
and  after  a  time  when  he  had  forgotten  the 
prose  he  turned  them  back  into  prose  again. 
Such  patience  and  determined  effort  for  the  en- 


146  Child    Culture 

richmeut  of  one's  power  of  expression  must  be 
followed  by  definite  results.  Where  can  one 
find  a  more  accurate  definition  of  a  bat  than 
that  given  by  a  little  boy  to  his  teacher :  "  He's 
a  nasty  little  mouse  with  ingy  rubber  wings 
and  shoe  string  tail,  and  bites  like  the  devil." 
No  biologist  could  better  enumerate  the  char- 
acteristics of  the  little  creature. 

Emerson  said  of  Montaigne's  words  that  they 
were  so  rich  that  if  you  cut  them  they  would 
bleed. 

Slang  words  and  expressions  are  the  bar- 
nacles that  cling  to  a  language,  and  should  be 
discouraged  for  several  reasons.  Their  use  is 
inelegant,  they  impoverish  the  language  be- 
cause one  depends  on  a  few  slang  phrases  to 
express  many  various  thoughts ;  and  the  objec- 
tion of  most  importance,  they  rarely  originate 
correctly  and  therefore  cannot  qualify  appro- 
priately the  subject  to  which  they  belong.  For 
instance  :  take  the  expression,  '*  that  is  a  chest- 
nut," meaning  a  stale  thought ;  there  is  no  con- 
nection or  appropriateness  between  the  word 
"  chestnut "  and  a  stale  topic ;  it  is  not  derived 
from  any  radical  that  bears  on  the  condition  to 
which  it  is  applied.  It  is  only  when  a  new 
word,  or  a  new  application  of  a  word,  is  prop- 
erly derived  and  enhances  the  quality,  or  gives 
a  better  description  of  a  subject,  that  its  use  is 
permissible.     Such   words  are   only  slang  be- 


Language  and  Literature  147 

cause  they  have  not  been  authoritatively  rec- 
ognized, but  they  gradually  become  incorpo- 
rated in  the  language,  because  of  their  adapta- 
bility, and  are  the  means  by  which  a  language 
grows  and  is  enriched.  For  example  :  the  word 
"  spicy "  conversation,  indicates  a  highly  fla- 
vored conversation,  and  the  word  "trap"  mean- 
ing to  ensnare  are  words  that,  while  deflected 
from  their  original  use,  are  so  well  applied  as 
to  be  unobjectionable. 

There  are  many  teachers  and  otherwise 
well  educated  persons  at  whose  ungrammatical 
use  of  the  English  language  one  is  astounded ; 
they  are  perfectly  familiar  with  the  rules  that 
prohibit  the  faults  they  make,  but  the  contagion 
of  early  surroundings  or  illiterate  associates 
bears  more  fruit  than  their  knowledge,  and 
they  have  acquired  the  habit  of  saying,  "  I 
seen  "  and  "  I  done  "  until  it  is  almost  ineradi- 
cable. How  few  there  are  of  even  the  well 
educated  class  whose  conversation  is  absolutely 
free  from  error,  and  who  use  really  good,  well- 
constructed  English,  while  the  language  of  the 
average  person  is  replete  with  the  grossest  mis- 
takes. If  the  vernacular  were  given  more  con- 
sideration, and  the  art  of  expression  inserted 
and  maintained  in  the  child's  curriculum  from 
the  beginning,  how  many  more  correct  conver- 
sationalists there  would  be,  and  how  the  pleas- 
ure of  conversation  would  be  increased. 


148  Child    Culture 

Next  to  the  practice  of  speaking  and  narrat- 
ing, composing  is  the  best  means  of  acquiring 
a  command  of  well  selected  words  and  fluency 
in  expression ;  and  the  reading  of  good  litera- 
ture is  also  essential  to  the  accomplishment. 

One  secret  of  literary  power  is  the  art  of 
putting  the  right  word  in  the  right  place,  and 
White's  "Words  and  Their  Uses"  and  Mat- 
thew's similar  work  are  excellent  books  on  the 
use  and  fine  distinction  of  words.  A  mean 
diction  weakens  any  verbal  or  written  produc- 
tion, while  the  right  use  of  words  elevates  and 
adorns  the  simplest  tale.  To  enlarge  one's  vo- 
cabulary, one  must  note  the  new,  unfamiliar 
words  that  one  hears  in  conversation,  or  meets 
with  in  reading.  From  the  time  a  child  is  old 
enough  to  handle  a  dictionary,  he  should  make 
constant  use  of  it  to  ascertain  the  meaning, 
origin,  and  pronunciation  of  unfamiliar  words. 
It  is,  however,  chiefly  by  associating  with  intelli- 
gent, cultivated  persons,  and  by  attending  to 
their  language  that  one  gains  a  cultured  diction. 
A  knowledge  of  rules  avails  little  if  one  does 
not  see  the  rules  exemplified  in  models,  there- 
fore one's  models  should  be  sought  in  the  best 
literature.  The  essentials  of  good  diction  are 
purity,  propriety,  and  precision. 

In  pronunciation,  one  of  the  common  errors 
of  uncultivated  persons  is  the  omission  of  the 
final  "g;"  they  say  "readin,"  "eatin',"  *'ridin'." 


Language  and  Literature  149 

If  the  parents  are  uneducated  and  cannot  aid 
their  children  in  acquiring  good  English  and 
establishing  themselves  in  the  use  of  it,  they 
should,  if  their  means  permit,  secure  for  the 
child  the  services  of  an  educated  governess ;  or 
if  unable  to  do  this,  they  should  supplement 
their  own  imperfect  education  with  a  study  of 
a  simple  grammar  and  a  rhetoric.  Being  writ- 
ten for  young  minds,  these  text-books  are  so 
simple,  clear  and  explicit  that  anyone  can  un- 
derstand them,  and  the  benefit  derived  is  cer- 
tainly commensurate  with  the  labor  the  study 
imposes.  Only  by  repeated  practice  does  one 
perfect  oneself  in  any  accomplishment,  and 
to  become  a  master  of  expression,  a  fluenr  and 
eloquent  speaker,  the  child  or  the  adult  must 
have  frequent  practice.  It  is  therefore  advis- 
able when  the  child  has  read  a  story  to  have 
him  recount  it  in  his  own  language,  with  the 
best  words  and  phraseology  he  can  command; 
a  great  improvement  in  style  will  soon  be 
noted. 

When  a  child  has  learned  to  observe  for  him- 
self, has  held  converse  with  nature,  and  has 
some  familiarity  with  the  concrete  world,  he  is 
ready  for  books.  Style  is  important,  even  in 
the  first  stages  of  a  child's  reading ;  he  cannot 
read  slipshod,  inferior,  poorly  expressed  prose 
without  undergoing  a  degradation  of  taste ;  if 
the  matter  is  insipid  and  the  style  cheap  and 


150  Child    Culture 

tawdry,  his  standard  of  taste  is  lowered,  and 
his  desire  for  the  best  things  lessened.  The 
training  during  the  unconscious  period  is  defi- 
nite and  permanent,  and  when  he  is  ready  to 
make  conscious  selection,  he  is  guided  by  the 
taste  already  developed. 

In  recent  years  the  market  has  been  flooded 
with  juvenile  literature  of  every  grade  and 
quality,  much  of  it  estimable  and  purposeful, 
and  more  of  it  trashy  and  weak,  if  not  perni- 
cious. The  legends  and  myths,  history  and 
biography  of  the  world  have  been  brought  to 
the  child's  level,  and  are  presented  in  simple 
yet  attractive  form  by  skilled  writers.  While 
many  of  these  modern  productions  are  merito- 
rious, there  are  many  pretended  histories  which 
contain  no  elements  of  real  value  to  the  child, 
but  simply  retail  the  vicious  deeds  of  kings, 
and  fill  the  pages  of  the  book  with  exciting 
episodes  which  may  gratify  the  young  reader, 
but  are  worse  than  valueless  to  him.  The 
pictures  of  these  histories  reveal  their  quality  ; 
if  they  present  only  brutal  battles,  and  the  one 
idea  is  carnage  and  the  clash  of  war,  they  will 
not  inspire  him  with  high  ideals  or  true  heroism. 
When  so  much  good  literature  is  at  the  service 
of  children  it  is  unwise  for  them  to  waste  their 
time  on  inferior  matter.  The  religious  ideal 
which  sought  to  make  a  boy  absolutely  un- 
worldly has  been  acknowledged  an  absurdity, 


Language  and  Literature  151 

and  stories  are  now  substituted,  which  teach 
him  how  to  live  worthily,  and  which  instil  good 
morals  and  right  conduct  in  a  more  practical 
way.  The  tone  of  a  book  should  be  healthy 
and  hopeful,  and  should  avoid  morbid  senti- 
mentality and  sensational  or  false  standards. 
There  are  still  so-called  "  children's  books " 
that  are  written  in  language  so  difficult  of  com- 
prehension, and  in  a  style  so  mature  that  an 
adult  can  scarcely  understand  them,  and  they 
are  like  Greek  to  the  child.  The  language  for 
children  should  be  simple,  though  it  need  not 
be  confined  to  monosyllables ;  it  should  be  choice, 
but  never  ponderous  in  expression. 

**  Mother  Goose  "  and  other  nursery  rhymes 
are  the  first  loves  of  children,  and  though  they 
do  not  belong  to  the  highest  order  of  poetry 
they  are  symmetrical  and  catchy,  and  seem  to 
fill  an  instinctive  need  of  childhood.  At  a 
"  Mothers'  Convention,"  recently  held  in 
Chicago,  the  seal  of  condemnation  was  set  on 
"  Mother  Goose "  and  kindred  rhymes,  but 
when  mothers  over  the  land  stood  aghast  at  the 
prospects  of  such  exclusion,  and  when  investi- 
gation of  the  constituency  of  the  convention 
was  made,  it  was  revealed  that  it  was  composed 
largely  of  men  and  unmarried  women,  who  by 
reason  of  their  inexperience  were  unqualified 
to  speak  in  the  premises.  Childhood  in  all 
ages  and  all  countries  has  been  the  same,  and 


152  Child    Culture 

we  may  be  sure  that  from  the  time  of  the 
small  Hebrews  and  Egyptians,  the  little  folks 
have  always  rhymed  and  have  had  some  equiv- 
alent for  "  Mother  Goose  !  " 

The  "  Mothers'  Convention  "  is  said  to  have 
objected  that  the  verses  were  not  literal  state- 
ments of  fact ;  that  there  was  no  reason  to  be- 
lieve for  instance  that  the  rhyme,  "  Hey 
diddle  diddle,  the  cat's  in  the  fiddle "  was  a 
faithful  portrayal  of  actual  circumstance,  and 
that  the  statement  that  the  *'  cow  jumped  over 
the  moon"  was  at  best  a  gross  exaggeration. 
God  pity  childhood  when  fancy  must  be  excluded 
from  its  verses,  and  they  must  deal  exclusively 
with  scientific  and  unyielding  facts.  It  is,  how- 
ever, consoling  to  reflect  that  platform  resolu- 
tions can  never  defeat  nature,  and  that  little 
children  will  remain  as  they  have  always  been. 
In  this  realistic  generation  there  are  some  who 
would  exclude  every  tale  that  is  an  emanation  of 
the  imagination,  all  "  fairy  tales  "  from  child 
lore,  but  the  cultivation  of  the  imagination  is  as 
important  a  part  of  the  development  of  the 
mind  as  is  the  training  of  the  faculties  of  per- 
ception, reflection  and  memory.  The  child's 
imagination  needs  training  more  than  it  needs 
exciting,  and  there  is  a  great  deal  of  truly 
pernicious  fairy  lore.  Anderson's  and  Grimm's 
fairy  tales  are  standards,  and  are  mostly  un- 
objectionable, but  the  best  myths  for  children 


Language  and  Literature  153 

are  the  classical  myths,  which  filled  the  im- 
agination of  the  race  in  its  childhood.  These 
are  not  only  entertaining  but  also  artistic  and 
instructive,  because  largely  symbolic.  Through 
them  the  child  is  initiated  into  the  art  world 
and  literature  of  the  early  Greeks,  still  the 
best  art  the  world  has  known.  Children  listen 
enraptured  to  the  story  of  Achilles,  of  the  true 
and  tender  Hector,  who  could  set  aside  his  wife 
and  baby  boy  and  respond  to  the  call  of  his  coun- 
try to  duty.  They  are  thrilled  with  the  efforts 
of  the  Greeks  to  capture  Troy  and  rescue  the 
beautiful  Helen,  and  all  the  other  heroic  fea- 
tures of  the  Trojan  war  so  graphically  described 
in  Homer's  noble  poem.  Other  good  literature 
of  this  class  are  Hawthrone's  "Tanglewood 
Tales  "  and  his  "  Wonderbook,'*  which  are  full 
of  a  symbolism  which  the  child  may  not  ap- 
preciate at  the  time,  but  will  appreciate  as  he 
matures.  The  child's  reading  should  embrace 
variety  of  matter,  fact  and  fiction — biography 
and  romance,  science  and  poetry,  the  real  and 
the  ideal.  One  should  not  always  impose  one's 
selection  on  him,  but  let  him  forage  for  himself 
among  a  well  chosen  number. 

If  parents  can  remember  what  books  made 
the  greatest  impression  on  their  lives,  which 
ones  awakened  healthy  sentiment,  inspired 
them  to  generous  action  and  enlarged  the  scope 
of  their  minds,  they  have  a  safe  practical  guide 


154  Child    Culture 

to  the  books  with  which  to  surround  their 
children.  The  books  that  are  read  in  child- 
hood, in  the  formative  period,  influence  the 
character  more  than  those  that  are  read  after 
the  character  is  formed;  it  is  important,  there- 
fore, wisely  to  direct  the  child's  reading,  and  to 
note  well  how  he  reads.  There  is  danger  in 
too  much  fiction ;  children  and  adults  may  be 
omniverous  readers  for  the  longest  period  and 
yet  not  read  one  book  that  is  of  real  value  to 
their  lives.  The  best  that  can  be  done  for  a 
child  is  to  cultivate  in  him  a  taste  for  good 
reading,  for  literature  that  inspires  and  elevates, 
that  so  impresses  his  heart  and  mind,  that  he 
goes  forth  therefrom  a  nobler  soul  and  with  a 
higher  purpose.  The  Bible  is  preeminently  the 
book  of  books;  in  it  is  the  aggregation  of 
wisdom,  knowledge,  moral  teaching  and  poetry; 
it  contains  the  most  stately  English,  the  most 
complete  system  of  ethics  the  world  has  yet 
received.  The  New  Testament  can  be  read  to  a 
child  as  soon  as  he  can  understand  it,  or  it  may 
be  given  him  to  read  himself,  but  from  the 
Old  Testament  selections  only  should  be  given, 
for  there  are  passages  both  in  its  story  and 
psalms  that  are  morally  unfit  for  any  child  to 
dwell  on.  For  the  study  of  the  Bible,  even 
children  should  go  straight  to  the  Bible  and 
not  read  the  children's  editions,  from  which  all 
real  beauty  and  value  have  been  expurgated ; 


Language  and  Literature  155 

the  "Book  of  Books  "  is  a  book  of  life  and  not 
a  book  of  letters. 

The  field  of  literature  open  to  youths  and 
maidens  is  quite  as  extensive  as  that  for  the 
younger  children;  for,  though  not  so  many 
books  are  written  for  young  people  of  this  age 
exclusively,  they  can  read  profitably  many  of 
the  works  written  for  younger  minds,  and  are 
also  now  ready  for  many  books  that  adults 
read.  Good  biographies,  histories  and  histori- 
cal novels  should  now  enter  the  catalogue, 
though  in  simpler  form  many  of  these  are  also 
understood  and  relished  by  the  younger  chil- 
dren. The  mother  or  father  should  take  time 
every  day  to  read  with  the  children,  if  only  a 
little  while,  because  in  the  parents'  company 
children  read  more  intelligently,  and  in  good 
reading  there  are  many  points  that  require  ex- 
planation ;  little  discussions  impress  the  vital 
points  on  the  child's  mind,  and  he  more  readily 
assimilates  the  ideas.  Shakespeare  is  an  author 
whose  works  may  profitably  be  in  constant 
reading  with  both  young  and  old. 

Some  children  have  little  or  no  taste  for 
reading ;  but  one  need  not  despair  of  such,  for 
books  are  only  one  means  of  culture,  and 
though  they  are  valuable  aids  to  the  mind 
there  are  many  sources  of  knowledge  besides. 
Shakespeare  puts  wise  words  in  the  mouth  of 
Corin  in  "As  You  Like  It"  when   he  says* 


156  Child    Culture 

"  He  that  wants  money,  means  and  conduct  is 
without  three  good  friends — that  the  property 
of  rain  is  to  wet,  and  fire  to  burn — that  good 
pasture  makes  fat  sheep,  and  a  great  cause  of 
the  night  is  lack  of  sun ;  and  he  that  hath 
learned  no  wit  by  nature  nor  art  may  complain 
of  good  breeding,  or  comes  of  very  dull  kin- 
dred." 

Poetry  seems  in  danger  of  being  overlooked 
in  this  materialistic  age,  and  parents  should  en- 
deavor to  instil  early  a  taste  for  this  form  of 
literature.  How  much  the  world  would  have 
lost  if  its  sweet  singers,  Longfellow,  Whittier, 
Tennyson,  Burns  and  a  host  of  others  had  not 
lived  and  delighted  it  with  their  sweet  and  en- 
nobling thoughts  and  aspirations.  To  them, 
however,  who  read  them  not,  who  do  not  pay 
heed  to  their  lofty  ideas  and  tender  emotions,  it 
is  as  if  they  had  not  been. 

There  is  as  great  disadvantage  in  too  much 
reading  as  in  too  little,  for  then  it  usurps 
thought  instead  of  feeding  it. 

The  pictures  in  many  of  the  modern  books 
are  true  works  of  art  and  are  often  more  educa- 
tive than  the  printed  matter ;  in  others,  they 
are  in  the  worst  sense  immoral  and  degrading. 
Books  containing  such  detestable  daubs  should 
never  be  presented  to  a  child,  for  his  thoughts, 
are  as  much  influenced  by  the  pictures  as  by 
the  reading  matter.     A   few   publishers  have 


Language  and  Literature  157 

made  a  specialty  of  artistic  illustrations,  and 
the  movement  is  most  commendable. 

In  reading,  the  important  point  is  to  select 
subjects  in  which  one  is  interested.  It  is  as- 
tonishing how  carelessly  people  select  what 
they  read.  They  seem  to  take  by  chance,  and 
not  in  accordance  with  a  definite  course  marked 
by  individual  taste  and  interest.  They,  like 
the  sailors  of  Ulysses,  take  bags  of  wind  for 
sacks  of  treasures.  When  one  reflects  how  in- 
numerable books  are,  and  how  very  few  the 
hours  for  reading,  is  not  the  importance  of  a 
restricted,  well  selected  list  most  manifest? 
There  is  a  struggle  for  existence,  and  for  a  sur- 
vival of  the  fittest  among  books  as  well  as 
among  animals,  and  those  which  have  long  sur- 
vived may  be  taken  to  have  the  right  qualifica- 
tions. A  familiarity  with  the  classic  master- 
pieces is  always  a  good  beginning,  and  then 
one's  taste  becomes  suflficiently  true  to  make 
wise  choice  of  the  moderns.  A  large  part  of 
modern  reading  is  devoted  to  reviews,  maga- 
zines and  newspapers,  and  though  they  are 
valuable  in  informing  us  on  topics  of  current 
interest,  their  use  should  be  limited,  and  they 
should  not  be  permitted  to  usurp  the  time  and 
thought  of  permanent  literature.  To  speak  in 
words  better  than  my  own :  "  It  is  no  over- 
statement to  say  that  other  things  being  equal, 
the  man  who  has  the  greatest  amount  of  Intel- 


158  Child    Culture 

lectual  resources  is  in  the  least  danger  from  in- 
ferior temptations, — if  for  no  other  reason,  be- 
cause he  has  fewer  idle  moments.  The  ruin  of 
most  men  dates  from  some  vacant  hour.  Occu- 
pation is  the  armor  of  the  soul,  and  the  train  of 
idleness  is  borne  up  by  all  the  vices.  I  remem- 
ber a  satirical  poem,  in  which  the  devil  is 
represented  as  fishing  for  men,  and  adapting 
his  baits  to  the  taste  and  temperament  of  his 
prey ;  but  the  idler,  he  said,  pleased  him  most, 
because  he  bit  the  naked  hook.  To  a  young 
man  away  from  home,  friendless  and  forlorn  in 
a  great  city,  the  hours  of  peril  are  those  be- 
tween sunset  and  bedtime,  for  the  moon  and 
the  stars  see  more  of  evil  in  a  single  hour  than 
the  sun  in  his  whole  day's  circuit.  The  poet's 
visions  of  evening  are  all  compact  of  tender 
and  soothing  images.  It  brings  the  wanderer 
to  his  home,  the  child  to  its  mother's  arms,  the 
ox  to  his  stall,  and  the  weary  laborer  to  his 
rest.  But  to  the  gentle -hearted  youth  who  is 
tlirown  upon  the  rock  of  a  pitiless  city,  and 
stands  'homeless  amid  a  thousand  homes,'  the 
approach  of  evening  brings  with  it  an  aching 
sense  of  loneliness  and  desolation,  which  comes 
down^pon  the  spirit  like  darkness  upon  the 
earth.  In  this  mood,  his  best  impulses  become 
a  snare  to  him,  and  he  is  led  astray  because  he 
is  social,  affectionate,  sympathetic,  and  warm- 
hearted.   If  there  be  a  young  man  thus  circum- 


Language  and  Literature  159 

stanced  within  the  sound  of  my  voice,  let  me 
say  to  him  that  books  are  the  friends  of  the 
friendless,  and  that  a  library  is  the  home  of  the 
homeless.  A  taste  for  reading  will  always  carry 
you  into  the  best  possible  company,  and  enable 
you  to  converse  with  men  who  will  instruct  you 
by  their  wisdom,  and  charm  you  by  their  wit ; 
who  will  soothe  you  when  fretted,  refresh  you 
when  weary,  counsel  you  when  perplexed,  and 
sympathize  with  you  at  all  times.  Evil  spirits 
in  the  middle  ages  were  exorcised  and  driven 
away  by  the  bell,  book  and  candle :  you  want 
but  two  of  these  agents, — the  book  and  the 
candle.'* 

As  remarked  before,  it  is  not  the  quantity  of 
reading  one  does  that  profits  most,  but  the 
quality  of  the  matter,  and  above  all,  the  manner 
and  the  attitude  of  the  reader.  When  one  has 
thoroughly  assimilated  a  few  of  the  great  clas- 
sical masterpieces  and  desires  to  extend  his  ac- 
quaintance, he  should  next  read  the  books 
which  suit  the  bent  of  his  own  mind,  those 
which  most  interest  and  instruct  him,  and  that 
have  a  tendency  to  fit  him  for  his  work  in  life. 
One's  mind  only  opens  to  that  which  interests 
one  ;  if  the  attention  is  not  absorbed,  no  mat- 
ter how  noble  are  the  thoughts  and  sentiments 
one  is  considering,  they  mean  nothing  to  the 
reader.  The  next  essential  to  "interest"  is 
that  a  book  should  set  one's  mind  in  motion, 


i6o  Child    Culture 

and  the  more  it  makes  one  think,  and  the 
higher  the  themes  it  precipitates  on  the  mind, 
the  better  are  its  qualifications.  But  the 
highest  purport  of  a  book  is  its  practical  use- 
fulness, the  degree  with  which  it  inspires  one's 
conduct,  makes  one  resolute  to  follow  what  is 
good  and  noble.  These  characteristics  indicate 
whether  a  book  is  adapted  to  an  individual, 
whether  it  is  in  one's  special  line  of  reading. 

Next  to  knowing  what  to  read,  the  important 
question  is  how  to  read.  "  First,  before  you 
peruse  a  book,  know  something  about  the  au- 
thor.** This  insures  one's  interest  from  the  be- 
ginning, as  one  is  always  more  interested  in  a 
person's  thoughts,  with  whom  one  has  some  ac- 
quaintance, than  with  a  stranger's.  A  bio- 
graphical notice  of  the  writer  introduces  one  to 
him  ;  a  knowledge  of  his  life,  his  character, 
and  the  circumstances  amid  which  the  book 
was  composed  enable  one  to  read  his  works 
much  more  intelligently.  Next,  "Read  the 
preface  carefully."  The  reading  of  the  preface 
is  the  truest  test  of  an  accomplished  reader ; 
therein  are  found  the  author's  motives  for 
writing  the  book,  and  we  have  a  foretaste  of 
the  volume  itself;  the  preface  is  the  appetizer 
of  the  book.  Now,  "  take  a  comprehensive 
survey  of  the  table  of  contents."  If  the  preface 
is  the  appetizer,  the  table  of  contents  is  the 
bill  of  fare.    It  is  like  the  map  of  a  journey 


Language  and  Literature  161 

showing  us  through  what  tracts  our  way  lies, 
and  to  what  destinations  it  will  lead  us.  An- 
other important  direction  is,  *'  Give  your  whole 
attention  to  whatever  you  read."  The  man  who 
has  thoroughly  comprehended  even  one  great 
book,  who  has  analyzed  its  characters,  scaled  its 
highest  thoughts,  felt  its  deepest  pathos,  would 
be  a  formidable  antagonist  to  a  man  of  many 
books,  who,  however,  had  skimmed  through 
them  carelessly  and  inattentively.  The  next 
point  in  manner  of  reading  is  "  Be  sure  to  note 
the  most  valuable  passages  as  you  read."  All 
accomplished  readers  keep  a  notebook  at  hand 
and  jot  down  briefly  any  facts,  arguments  or 
sentences  that  strike  them.  Without  taking 
notes  one  cannot  be  an  intelligent  reader,  for 
how  can  one  be  intelligent  without  discriminat- 
ing, and  if  one  discriminates  one  distinguishes, 
and  one  cannot  distinguish  without  affixing 
some  distinctive  mark.  All  great  scholars  have 
been  great  note  takers,  and  have  proved  them- 
selves in  reading  as  in  other  things,  men  of 
MARK.  The  last  two  injunctions  are,  "  Write 
out  in  your  own  language  a  summary  of  the 
facts  you  have  noticed  "  and  **  Apply  the  re- 
sults of  your  own  reading  to  your  everyday 
life."  Repetition  in  composition,  by  using 
one's  own  arrangement  and  phraseology,  fixes 
the  thought  of  a  book  much  more  securely  in 
one's  mind,  and  gives  one  mastery  of  a  subject 


l62  Child    Culture 

more  completely  than  any  other  method.  If 
one  cannot  write  a  summary,  one  should  speak 
it ;  try  to  communicate  a  clear  and  correct  ac- 
count of  it  to  another.  This  habit  is  one  of 
the  reasons  why  some  men  appear  to  have  won- 
derful memories.  Whatever  they  hear  or  read 
they  tell  to  everyone  they  meet,  and  thus  it 
never  leaves  their  minds.  If  you  will  neither 
write  it  nor  relate  it  to  another,  then  at  least 
digest  it  by  going  over  it  in  your  mind;  that  is 
indispensable.  The  last  rule,  "Apply  the  re- 
sults of  your  reading  to  your  everyday  duties,'* 
should  need  no  elucidation.  While  one  is  read- 
ing, one  is  using  the  minds  of  the  authors ;  they 
support  the  reader's  mind,  and  carry  it  along, 
making  it  go  through  all  their  own  processes. 
This  develops  mental  energy,  but  if  nothing 
else  is  done,  he  will  remain  a  mere  infant  in  in- 
tellect. He  must  think  for  himself;  he  must 
imitate  their  manner  of  thinking ;  he  must  ap- 
ply to  his  everyday  duties  those  qualifications 
which  have  made  the  author  so  great.  After 
his  intercourse  with  the  great  souls  of  the  past 
he  must  prove  himself  to  be  clearer  in  head, 
larger  in  heart,  and  nobler  in  action.  This  is 
the  great  end  achieved  by  books.  If  they  only 
make  a  man  a  book  worm,  they  are  little  better 
than  waste  paper. 

Some  may  find  these  directions  too  arduous, 
and  may  not  wish  to  bother  with  reading  bio- 


Language  and  Literature  163 

graphies  and  prefaces,  making  notes  and  sum- 
maries. To  these,  Pryde  says  :  "  You  have 
just  two  alternatives  between  which  to  choose. 
If  you  are  lazy  and  listless,  if  you  have  no  de- 
sire to  become  wiser  and  better — if  in  other 
words,  you  are  dolts  and  simpletons,  then  you 
will  continue  to  doze  and  dream  over  whatever 
books  come  to  hand,  and  will  remain  ignorant 
forevermore.  But  if  you  are  active  and 
earnest — if  you  wish  to  succeed  in  life — if  you 
covet  the  title  of  rational  beings — if  you  have 
the  sense  to  appreciate  good  advice  and  the 
resolution  to  carry  it  out,  then  you  will  read 
according  to  a  well-defined  and  rigid  method." 

Acknowledgment  is  made  to  David  Pryde's  * '  Highways 
of  Literature  "  for  the  directions  in  this  chapter  on  "  How 
to  Read." 


xn 

MANNERS 

A  CODE  of  etiquette  may  refine  the  manners, 
but  the  "  heart  of  courtesy  "  which  stamps  the  nat- 
ural gentleman  comes  through  instinct.  Happy 
is  the  child,  and  happy  the  man  who  has  the 
gift  of  a  heart  so  gentle  by  nature  and  so  con- 
siderate, whose  manners  have  such  inborn  grace, 
that  little  or  no  training  is  required  to  fit  him 
for  harmonious  intercourse  with  his  fellow-man. 
This  type  of  man  is  rare ;  the  average  man  re- 
quires much  training  before  his  politeness  be- 
comes at  all  instinctive.  The  earlier  in  life 
attention  is  bestowed  on  manners,  the  less  diffi- 
culty is  there  in  establishing  that  unfailing 
good  breeding  and  polish  which  mark  the  per- 
fect gentleman. 

Some  persons  are  averse  to  the  acquirement 
of  fine  manners,  fearing  that  it  means  an  adop- 
tion of  much  ceremony,  and  a  sacrifice  of  sin- 
cerity and  simplicity.  If  one  is  good-natured, 
that  prevents  artifice, — if  one  is  truly  indul- 
gent, no  violation  of  sincerity  is  necessary. 

The  absence  of  a  fixed  aristocracy  or  reign- 
ing set,  the  influx  of  emigrants,  the  constant 
changes  of  fortune  in  the  families  of  this  coun- 
164 


Manners  165 

try,  and  the  political  changes  by  which  first  one 
stratum  and  then  another  is  left  on  top,  render 
a  fixed  standard  of  politeness  difficult  to  estab- 
lish. When  social  upheavals  are  less  frequent, 
the  codes  which  govern  social  matters  will  be 
more  definite  and  more  immutable.  The  most 
reliable  codes  are  those  that  emanate  from  peo- 
ple of  native  refinement  and  taste,  and  from  the 
experience  of  broad  and  cultivated  minds.  A 
noble  and  unselfish  heart  with  very  few  pre- 
cepts on  the  current  usages  of  good  society  is 
as  trustworthy  a  guide  as  one  needs ;  the  key- 
note to  good  manners  as  to  good  morals  being 
that  same  Golden  Rule  "  To  do  to  others  as  we 
would  that  they  should  do  to  us."  A  child  who 
is  not  trained  to  consider  the  rights  and  feel- 
ings of  others,  and  who  has  no  reverence  for 
older  people,  will  scarcely  develop  into  a  well 
mannered  man.  Through  thoughtlessness, 
haste  or  ignorance  he  may  be  guilty  of  rude- 
ness, but  if  his  heart  is  right  and  his  fault  is 
made  known  to  him,  he  will  not  repeat  it,  for 
no  gentleman  or  lady  will  knowingly  offend. 
It  is  the  parents*  duty  to  enlighten  the  child, 
and  to  train  him  into  a  proper  observance  of 
his  duties  to  his  elders,  his  companions,  and  all 
with  whom  he  comes  in  contact. 

As  manners  are  the  "  lesser  morals,"  no  one 
can  be  thoroughly  well-bred  who  has  not  a 
basis  of  good  morals.     He  may  have  gracious 


i66  Child   Culture 

manners  and  an  attractive  personality,  but  the 
defect  will  be  revealed  at  some  point  of  his  con- 
duct. All  etiquette  is  but  the  superstructure, 
the  foundation  of  which  is  Christian  principle 
and  Christian  virtue,  which  again  have  their 
root  in  Divine  Love.  Many  truly  conscientious 
persons  whose  surroundings  have  lacked  refine- 
ment, and  whose  education  has  not  redeemed 
them  from  the  effects  of  this  lack,  are  most  de- 
sirous of  knowing  the  means  by  which  the 
frictions  of  social  intercourse  may  be  avoided, 
but  they  scarcely  know  how  to  acquire  the 
necessary  knowledge. 

There  are  many  excellent  works  on  such  sub- 
jects, which  not  only  give  the  correct  forms,  but 
which  also  instruct  in  the  principles  underlying 
them,  and  give  reasons  for  their  adoption. 
From  the  frequent  lapses  and  delinquencies  of 
society,  it  is  evident  that  a  perusal  or  re -perusal 
of  some  book  on  etiquette  would  benefit  many. 
The  ill  manners  of  the  average  American  boy 
and  girl,  man  and  woman,  have  been  subjects 
of  severe  criticisms  by  foreigners  visiting  in 
this  country.  What  good  manners  they  do  pos- 
sess are  accompanied  by  more  sincerity  than 
those  of  foreigners,  whose  extremely  ceremo- 
nious manners  alwa3^s  savor  of  insincerity  to 
persons  unaccustomed  to  them. 

We  must  acknowledge  that  fine  manners  as 
an  art  are  not  much  cultivated  in  this  country. 


Manners  1 67 

Foreign  children  are  certainly  the  superiors  in 
this  respect  of  American  children.  I  hold  one 
of  the  chief  pleasures  of  a  foreign  sojourn  to 
be  the  witnessing  of  the  respectful,  well-bred 
children  there ;  courtesy  and  self-restraint  are 
universal,  and  impertinent  replies  to  parents 
and  elders  are  unknown.  Everyone  who  has 
lived  abroad,  and  has  had  opportunity  for  ob- 
serving, will  admit  the  gratification  which  this 
experience  affords.  How  many  children  in  this 
country  rise  when  addressed  by  an  older  per- 
son who  is  standing,  or  when  one  enters  a 
room  ?  It  is  a  mark  of  deference  in  which  a 
European  cliild  will  seldom  fail,  and  it  is  a  fre- 
quent sight  at  a  hotel  table  to  see  a  whole  table 
of  children  standing,  while  an  older  person  also 
standing  is  holding  a  brief  conversation  with 
the  parents,  who  of  course  have  also  risen. 
Children  are  not  indulged  in  those  countries  as 
they  are  here.  They  are  much  more  arbitrarily 
governed  and  have  not  the  familiar  intercourse 
with  their  parents  which  is  enjoyed  by  our 
children. 

This  intimate  association  has  its  advantages 
as  well  as  its  disadvantages ;  the  American 
child  gives  his  parents  much  more  of  his  confi- 
dence than  does  the  other,  and  hence  the  gain 
is  perhaps  greater  than  the  loss ;  but  the  unhes- 
itating obedience  and  invariable  respect  that  are 
practiced   abroad   cannot  but  command  one's 


l68  Child    Culture 

approbation  and  admiration.  The  absolute  mon- 
archy of  childhood  that  exists  in  many  Amer- 
ican homes  would  be  considered  a  fairy  tale  in 
those  well  disciplined  families. 

It  is  not  my  intention  to  set  forth  a  code  of 
etiquette  or  of  the  usages  which  govern  good 
society ;  this  has  been  done  so  well  in  various 
other  publications  that  it  is  unnecessary;  but  I 
will  refer  to  a  few  essential  points  to  which 
special  attention  may  profitably  be  called,  both 
because  of  their  importance  and  because  failure 
in  observing  them  is  frequent. 

Of  these,  none  is  more  grievous  than  the  one 
just  mentioned — the  irreverence  of  children 
toward  their  elders,  and  especially  their  moth- 
ers and  fathers.  It  is  the  greatest  blemish  that 
exists  on  the  childhood  of  this  country  to-day, 
and  the  parents  are  more  responsible  for  the 
condition  than  are  the  children,  for  no  parent 
is  fulfilling  his  duty  to  his  child,  or  possesses  his 
proper  quota  of  self-respect,  who  permits  his 
child  to  contradict  him,  to  ridicule  him,  or  to 
treat  him  with  any  manner  of  rudeness.  Is  it 
not  a  common  act  for  a  child  to  oppose  his 
opinions  to  his  parents,  to  refuse  to  obey,  to 
retort  impertinently,  or  to  walk  away  while 
being  addressed?  Whence  arises  this  most 
deplorable  disrespect  ?  The  child  is  not  lacking 
in  parental  affection  as  one  might  suppose. 
The  cause  is  not  so  serious  as  that,  but  it  is 


Manners  169 

probable,  that  while  parents  and  children  live 
in  such  close  and  intimate  association  as  they 
do  in  most  households,  the  child  regards  the 
parents  more  as  his  equals  than  as  his  superiors, 
and  the  parents  foster  the  feeling  in  both  its 
worthy  and  unworthy  aspects.  Nothing  is 
more  beautiful  than  a  close  companionship  be- 
tween parents  and  their  children.  A  perfect 
example  and  illustrious  model  has  just  been 
revealed  to  us  in  the  life  of  the  late  Eugene 
Field,  who  was  always  a  child  among  children 
in  his  own  family,  his  heart  ever  overflowing 
with  love  and  sympathy  for  their  minutest  joys 
and  sorrows. 

But  the  sweetest  companionship  is  compati- 
ble with  parental  respect,  and  a  determination 
and  perseverance  on  the  parent's  part  can,  and 
will,  sustain  it.  Not  one  instance  of  rudeness, 
disrespect  or  flippancy  should  pass  unnoticed, 
nor  unpunished  if  persisted  in,  and  this  attitude 
may  be  maintained  without  any  diminution  of 
confidence  or  of  filial  affection. 

Reverence  for  the  aged  and  solicitude  for 
their  welfare  is  an  indispensable  quality  of  a 
virtuous  character.  More  than  any,  the  feeling 
of  reverence  needs  quickening  and  strengthen- 
ing, for  lack  of  reverence  is  the  besetting  weak- 
ness of  the  children  and  youth  of  the  present 
generation. 

As  well  as  the  courtesy  which  the  child  owes, 


lyo  Child    Culture 

I  would  emphasize  that  which  is  due  the  child. 
This  is  too  often  ignored  or  regarded  lightly. 
The  child's  self  respect  and  the  respect  he 
shows  others  are  strongly  influenced  by  the  re- 
spect that  is  shown  him.  His  failures  in  cour- 
tesy aud  good  breeding  should  not  be  renaarked 
upon  in  the  presence  of  others.  If  it  is  desired 
that  he  relinquish  his  seat  in  favor  of  another, 
at  any  time  or  place,  it  should  be  courteously 
suggested  and  not  demanded.  All  of  his  indi- 
vidual rights  should  be  recognized  and  duly 
respected.  Such  treatment  will  develop  in  him 
a  much  more  genuine  regard  and  consideration 
for  others  than  the  method  which  violates  and 
disregards  all  his  inherent  rights.  If  the 
parents  desire  a  friendly  good  morning  from 
him,  they  should  greet  him  with  the  same. 
They  should  never  fail  to  thank  him  for  atten- 
tions, for  nothing  so  surely  begets  politeness  as 
politeness.  No  child  can  become  truly  courte- 
ous unless  he  is  so  in  the  everyday  life  of  his 
home.  Good  manners  cannot  be  put  off  and 
on  as  one  does  one's  clothes,  without  visible 
marks  of  unfamiliarity  therewith. 

The  children  whose  education  has  rendered 
them  superior  to  their  parents  in  mental  attain- 
ments should  not  consider  that  this  advantage 
excuses  them  from  the  duty  of  filial  reverence, 
but  their  gratitude  for  the  advantages  afforded 
them  should  be   manifestly  increased.     It  is 


Manners  1 7 1 

through  the  kindness  and  self-sacrifice  of  the 
parents  that  the  opportunities  were  afforded, 
and  it  were  worse  than  ingratitude  to  requite 
them  unworthily. 

When  the  parents  have  guests,  the  younger 
members  of  the  family  should  pay  them  the 
respect  of  their  attention  at  least,  even  if  they 
do  not  participate  in  the  conversation,  and  they 
should  not  continue  reading  or  be  otherwise 
preoccupied  in  their  presence. 

Another  violation  of  good  breeding  is  the  at- 
titude of  many  children  toward  the  domestics 
of  the  household.  In  many  families  their  lot  is 
a  hard  one,  including  not  only  the  frequent  in- 
justice and  unkindness  of  the  mistress,  but  the 
tyranny  and  arbitrariness  of  the  children. 
Many  families  seem  bent  on  getting  all  the 
service  they  possibly  can  with  as  little  requital 
as  possible ;  they  never  consult  the  interest  or 
convenience  of  their  servant ;  no  feeling  of 
sympathy  or  concern  for  her  welfare  ever  enters 
their  selfish  hearts,  but  the  small  wages  paid 
are  supposed  to  make  purchase  of  all  her  liberty. 
When  the  heads  of  households  manifest  so  little 
humanity,  is  it  any  wonder  if  the  child  catches 
the  spirit  of  domination  and  wishes  to  be  party 
to  the  absolutism  that  reigns?  Such  a  policy 
results  in  no  profit  to  its  promoter,  for  a  servant 
is  not  long  in  recognizing  the  situation,  and  her 
services  become  more  and  more  reluctant. 


172  Child    Culture 

A  tone  of  hostility  between  a  family  aud  its 
servants  is  an  unfailing  indication  of  vulgarity 
and  puts  the  stamp  of  low  breeding  on  the 
members  of  all  homes  that  indulge  in  it.  Serv- 
ants are  amenable  to  civility,  and  they  should 
be  accorded  every  consideration  and  privilege 
consistent  with  the  domestic  arrangements ; 
children  should  be  required  to  request  a  serv- 
ice, not  to  command  it.  Scolding  of  servants 
seldom  avails,  for  the  self-respecting  ones  will 
not  suffer  it,  and  those  who  do  suffer  it  are  not 
affected  by  it.  The  faults  can  be  pointed  out 
without  harshness,  and  correction  urged  with 
civility,  and  if  one  asks  them  why  they  neg- 
lected their  duty,  their  own  answer  accuses 
them  better  than  the  mistress  can.  Children 
should  not  be  permitted  to  make  unnecessary 
demands  on  them  and  cause  them  to  run  up 
and  downstairs  for  little  services  that  can  be 
dispensed  with,  or  that  they  can  render  them- 
selves. Unless  the  service  of  a  house  be  very 
ample,  this  consideration  should  always  be 
shown.  They  should  be  permitted  to  eat  their 
meals  without  interruption  if  possible,  as  every- 
one knows  how  unpleasant  it  is  to  be  constantly 
disturbed  at  one's  meals,  and  it  should  not  be 
demanded  of  them  that  they  remain  sitting  up 
until  midnight  in  view  of  some  possible  service 
required; — it  is  very  unreasonable  to  expect 
them  to  work  all  day  and  lose  sleep  half  the 


Manners  1 73 

night  too.  Defects  in  principle  should  be  dealt 
with  more  severely  than  all  others,  and  servants 
who  are  deficient  in  good  morals  ought  not  to 
be  retained,  as  they  are  not  only  dangerous 
themselves,  but  their  influence  in  the  household 
is  too  pernicious  to  risk. 

Even  in  their  plays  and  games  children  can 
be  trained  to  gentleness  and  self-restraint  with- 
out diminution  of  their  pleasure  ;  rudeness  and 
boisterousness  add  nothing  to  their  real  enjoy- 
ment and  are  a  serious  disturbance  to  others. 
They  should  be  taught  to  hold  personal  defects 
sacred,  not  only  never  to  allude  to  them,  but  to 
appear  not  to  observe  them  ;  they  should  also 
disapprove  of  any  infringement  of  this  consid- 
eration on  the  part  of  their  playmates. 

There  is  one  slovenly  habit  to  which  both 
young  and  old  are  subject  in  this  country  and 
of  which  one  sees  less  abroad :  it  is  the  litter- 
ing of  public  places  with  refuse.  Our  streets, 
parks,  steamboats,  cars,  almost  all  places  to 
which  the  public  has  access,  are  rendered  filthy 
by  expectoration  and  by  the  remains  of  food. 
Picnic  grounds  are  always  left  in  the  most  un- 
sightly condition,  and  unless  some  one  in  serv- 
ice immediately  removes  the  debris,  it  is  very 
offensive  to  the  passer-by  and  to  those  arriving 
on  the  spot  later.  It  is  an  unclean  practice  and 
children  should  be  better  trained.  It  is  an  easy 
and  simple  matter  to  throw  orange  peels,  egg 


174  Child    Culture 

shells  and  other  refuse  into  the  empty  lunch 
baskets,  and  dispose  of  them  properly  on  reach- 
ing home.  Everywhere,  streets  are  now  being 
provided  with  receptacles  for  waste  matter,  and 
they  should  be  used  for  the  purpose  intended, 
and  not  become  additional  "wastes"  them- 
selves. In  the  home,  no  signs  of  luncheon  or 
refreshment  should  be  visible,  but  everything 
removed  promptly,  each  room  containing  a 
waste  basket  for  the  reception  of  nutshells,  etc. 

Traveling  is  one  of  the  greatest  tests  of  good 
breeding;  space  being  limited,  friction  more 
easily  arises,  and  conveniences  being  few,  only 
a  constant  regard  for  the  interests  of  others 
prevents  trespass.  The  toilet  rooms  should  al- 
ways be  left  as  one  would  wish  to  find  them  ; 
when  all  the  seats  are  required,  one  should  be 
very  careful  not  to  utilize  more  than  one  is  en- 
titled to.  In  the  matter  of  ventilation  and 
open  windows,  the  pleasure  of  others  should  be 
considered  as  well  as  one's  own,  and  great  for- 
bearance shown  to  the  unavoidable  disturbances 
of  babies  and  children.  Mothers  suffer  agonies 
themselves  when  their  babies  cry  and  they  are 
conscious  that  others  are  being  annoyed,  but 
they  cannot  always  control  the  annoyance,  and 
one  should  be  as  indulgent  as  possible. 

At  no  time  and  place  are  good  manners  and 
good  breeding  more  manifest  or  more  imperative 
than  in  visiting  friends.     It  requires  infinite 


Manners  1 75 

tact,  much  good  sense  and  thought,  to  spend 
days  and  weeks  in  another's  home,  and  so  to 
regulate  one's  time  and  presence  as  to  make  no 
superfluous  bestowals  of  either.  One  essential 
is  to  be  agreeable  to  whatever  is  proposed  for 
one's  entertainment,  and  to  participate  as  fully 
as  possible  in  the  pleasures  arranged  for  one ; 
persons  who  express  indifference  and  distaste 
to  every  suggestion  that  is  made  for  their  en- 
joyment are  never  popular  guests,  and  one  visit 
usually  suffices  that  particular  hostess.  The 
guest  should  see  that  the  hostess  meets  all  the 
visitors  who  call  on  her,  and  should  make  no 
engagements  with  others  without  first  consult- 
ing and  gaining  the  approval  of  her  friend. 
Promptness  at  meals,  and  careful  attention  to 
the  regulations  of  the  house  are  required,  as 
well  as  great  consideration  in  the  demands  on 
the  service  of  the  domestics.  If  one  is  visiting 
in  a  family  in  which  the  members  by  reason  of 
scarcity  of  servants  attend  to  their  own  rooms 
or  do  part  of  the  work  of  the  house,  one  should  , 
take  care  of  one's  own  room,  or  at  least  make 
the  bed  and  attend  to  the  disposal  of  one's! 
wearing  apparel,  and  at  all  times  keep  the  room 
as  tidy  and  well  ordered  as  possible.  One  can- 
not be  too  careful  of  misusing  and  damaging 
the  furniture  in  the  friend's  house,  and  whether 
it  be  costly  or  inexpensive,  it  should  receive 
equal  consideration.     Persons  who  are  accus- 


176  Child    Culture 

tomed  to  fine  furnishings  and  surroundings  are 
the  most  particular  in  this  regard.  One  should 
have  a  book  or  a  piece  of  work  in  which  one  is 
interested,  and  which,  when  she  cannot  be  pres- 
ent, the  hostess  naay  consider  a  resource  for  the 
guest.  At  certain  times  of  the  day,  (if  the 
hostess  is  preoccupied  in  the  morning,  let  it  be 
the  morning,  or  if  it  seems  more  convenient, 
during  a  part  of  the  afternoon)  guests  should 
withdraw  and  give  the  hostess  a  little  time  for 
her  personal  affairs  and  for  recuperation.  Noth- 
ing is  more  irksome  and  wearisome  than  con- 
tinuous society,  however  enjoyable  it  may  be  at 
intervals.  On  returning  from  entertainments 
late  at  night,  it  is  scarcely  necessary  to  suggest 
that  the  guest  come  in  as  noiselessly  as  possi- 
ble, and  no  sound  be  made  that  can  disturb 
the  sleeping  family.  Perhaps  the  most  impera- 
tive rule  of  visiting  is  that  nothing  that  trans- 
pires of  a  discreditable  nature,  or  which  might 
elicit  criticism,  shall  ever  pass  one's  lips;  no 
greater  breach  of  delicacy  or  good  breeding  can 
be  committed. 

The  requirements  of  polite  visiting  are  too 
many  to  enumerate  here,  but  a  general 
thoughtfulness  and  a  consideration  of  the  sug- 
gestions here  made  will  enable  one  to  avoid  the 
chief  offences  to  which  the  untrained  visitor  is 
liable.  The  hostess,  on  the  other  hand,  has  to 
pursue  a  middle  course  in  the  entertainment  of 


C  UNIVERS: 
Manners     ^**^£^^3-77 

a  guest,  to  steer  between  overattention  and 
neglect.  Every  guest  feels  better  and  freer  if 
she  is  not  overwhelmed  with  attention,  if  she 
is  occasionally  left  to  her  own  resources,  for 
she  is  then  assured  that  her  presence  is  making 
no  inconvenient  demands  on  her  hostess. 

The  etiquette  of  calls  and  cards  is  so  compli- 
cated that  an  elucidation  thereof  would  require 
several  chapters,  but  a  few  cardinal  points  may 
be  suggested  here.  While  it  is  the  privilege  in 
all  but  the  largest  cities  and  Washington,  of 
the  older  residents  to  call  on  the  newcomer, 
even  before  they  have  met,  it  is  better  not  to 
make  such  calls  hastily,  except  in  the  case  of 
near  neighbors.  Others  should  have  met  the 
lady  and  feel  sure  that  their  acquaintance  is 
desired ;  but  one  may  always  call  when  re- 
quested by  a  common  friend  to  do  so* 

First  calls  must  invariably  be  returned,  and 
should  be  returned  within  a  week;  if  the  ac- 
quaintance is  not  desired,  further  calls  may  be 
omitted,  but  return  of  the  first  call  is  impera- 
tive. After  a  dinner  party  a  call  must  be 
made  in  person  and  promptly ;  after  other  forms 
of  entertainment  one  is  privileged  to  send  or 
leave  a  card  without  asking  for  the  hostess,  ex- 
cept on  her  day  at  home,  when  one  must  see 
her.  One  should  never  hand  one's  card  to  the 
hostess,  for  the  card  acts  as  one's  representa- 
tive, and  the  two  should  not  meet  the  hostess 


178  Child    Culture 

together.  If  on  entering  a  drawing-room  the 
hostess  is  there,  the  card  can  be  laid  on  the 
table,  or  returned  to  the  card  case. 

Ladies  who  have  a  very  large  circle  of  friends 
to  whom  they  cannot  pay  personal  visits  an- 
nually, give  "  At  Homes  "  or  receptions  in  place 
of  calls,  and  such  invitations  substitute  a  per- 
sonal call.  No  regrets  or  acceptances  are  ex- 
pected before  these  functions ;  one  leaves  a  card 
at  the  door  on  entering,  or  if  one  cannot  attend 
one  may  send  one's  card  by  mail  or  proxy  or 
call  afterward.  No  one  has  the  privilege  of 
entertaining  a  lady  except  at  an  "At  Home," 
until  calls  have  been  exchanged,  and  when  one 
receives  invitations  from  persons  who  have 
omitted  the  preliminary  attention,  one  should 
not  accept,  for  though  the  intention  may  be 
good,  and  the  omission  is  doubtless  made  in  ig- 
norance, it  is  the  duty  of  every  woman  in 
society  to  know  and  to  conform  to  the  usages 
of  "good  society."  If  one  wishes  to  be  excused 
from  a  caller  it  should  be  done  at  the  door  be- 
fore she  is  admitted,  and  never  after,  as  she 
may  feel  that  it  is  a  personal  refusal.  Callers 
should  never  forget  to  ask  and  leave  cards  for 
the  lady  of  the  house  when  calling  on  a  visitor 
in  the  house,  and  likewise,  visitors  should  be 
requested  both  by  the  hostess  and  her  callers  to 
meet  all  of  the  latter  who  call. 

It  is  extremely  negligent  when  an  entertain- 


Manners  1 79 

ment  is  given  in  compliment  to  a  visitor  for 
the  invited  guests  to  neglect  that  visitor.  She 
is,  by  the  circumstances,  entitled  to  the  most 
cordial  attention  from  all  present ;  a  disregard 
of  this  courtesy  is  not  only  extremely  mortify- 
ing to  a  hostess  and  her  guest,  but  would  war- 
rant her  being  thoroughly  ashamed  of  the  in- 
vited guests. 

Well-bred  people  always  converse  in  low 
tones  and  never  laugh  boisterously ;  especially 
at  public  entertainments  is  it  selfish  to  speak 
or  to  make  any  noise  that  can  disturb  the  per- 
sons in  the  adjacent  seats.  Children  should  be 
instructed  in  the  art  of  doing  every  act  in  the 
best  manner ;  in  passing  or  handing  a  chair  it 
is  unnecessary  to  strike  it  against  anything,  or 
to  touch  anyone  with  it.  Perfect  repose  of 
manner  is  the  greatest  elegance ;  in  the  details 
of  life  persons  show  their  good  or  ill  breeding 
even  more  than  in  the  large  observances. 
Prompt  acknowledgment  of  all  attention, 
prompt  responses  to  invitations,  the  courtesy 
of  an  early  call  after  invitations  and  entertain- 
ments, mark  the  degree  of  one's  refinement. 
In  approaching  a  lady  with  an  umbrella  in  her 
hand,  a  man  should  raise  his  high  enough  to 
pass  without  interfering.  In  all  carrying  of 
umbrellas,  canes  and  sunshades,  one  should 
take  care,  for  it  is  very  annoying  to  feel  the 
points  attacking  one's  hat  or  face,  and  one's 


l8o  Child    Culture 

companion  will  suffer  a  great  deal  rather  than 
mention  it.  In  making  way  through  a  crowd, 
one  should  never  jostle  or  push,  but  gently  and 
patiently  await  an  opening.  In  the  use  of  fans, 
much  unnecessary  discomfort  is  caused  others 
by  fanning  them  as  well  as  oneself,  for  while 
the  one  wielding  the  fan  may  be  too  warm,  her 
neighbor  may  be  shivering,  and  the  draught 
created  by  the  fan  most  unpleasant  to  her. 

One's  manner  of  sitting,  standing,  walking, 
every  act  and  movement  betray  the  degree  of 
one's  breeding,  and  should  be  considered  until 
the  best  manner  becomes  second  nature,  and  is 
done  unconsciously.  One  makes  a  circle  from 
the  unconscious  to  the  conscious,  and  then  back 
to  the  unconscious  again. 

.  The  subject  of  manners  is  inexhaustible,  and 
an  entire  book  might  profitably  be  given  to  its 
consideration,  but  in  this  limited  space  only  a 
few  of  the  most  frequent  delinquencies  can  be 
noticed. 

A  constantly  changing  society  admits  of 
many  interlopers,  who,  having  money  and  en- 
tertaining handsomely,  have  gained  access  to 
good  society.  Having  successfully  attained  a 
coveted  place,  they  are  most  disdainful  of  all 
new  aspirants;  having  so  recently  climbed  the 
social  ladder  themselves,  their  sole  thought  and 
pleasure  is  to  keep  off  all  others,  and  the  *'  ex- 
clusives"  of  society  are  usually  found  among 


Manners  181 

its  recent  additions.  Snubbing  is  the  delight  of 
parvenues,  and  none  are  so  tenacious  of  their 
position  and  hedge  it  around  so  closely  as  they 
who  hold  it  uncertainly. 

On  the  other  hand,  when  the  restriction  is  in 
behalf  of  good  breeding  and  genuine  worth 
and  culture,  no  one  can  complain ;  in  such  case 
the  exclusions  are  in  the  interest  of  the  admis- 
sions, and  all  who  are  entitled  to  enter  will  ap' 
predate  the  advantage  of  the  regulation. 


XIII 

HABITS   OF  CHILDHOOD 

"  Habit  a  second  nature  !  Habit  is  ten  times 
nature,"  the  Duke  of  Wellington  is  said  to  have 
exclaimed,  and  the  degree  to  which  this  is  true 
no  one  probably  can  appreciate  as  well  as  one 
who  is  a  veteran  soldier  himself.  The  daily 
drill  and  the  years  of  discipline  end  by  fashion- 
ing a  man  completely  over  again,  with  respect 
to  most  of  the  possibilities  of  his  conduct. 

"  There  is  a  story,"  says  Professor  Huxley, 
"  which  is  credible  enough,  though  it  may  not 
be  true,  of  a  practical  joker,  who,  seeing  a  dis- 
charged veteran  carrying  home  his  dinner,  sud- 
denly called  out,  '  Attention !  *  whereupon  the 
man  instantly  brought  his  hands  down  and  lost 
his  mutton  and  potatoes  in  the  gutter.  The 
drill  had  been  thorough,  and  its  effects  had  be- 
come embodied  in  the  man's  nervous  struc- 
ture. 

"  An  acquired  habit,  from  the  physiological 
point  of  view,  is  nothing  but  a  new  pathway  of 
discharge  formed  in  the  brain,  by  which  cer- 
tain incoming  currents  ever  after  tend  to 
escape ;  and  the  functions  of  perception,  mem- 
ory, reasoning,  the  education  of  the  will,  are 
182 


Habits  of  Childhood  183 

results  of  formations  de  novo  of  just  such  path- 
ways of  discharge.  The  habits  of  an  elemen- 
tary particle  cannot  change,  because  the  par- 
ticle is  itself  an  unchangeable  thing ;  but  those 
of  a  compound  mass  of  matter  can  change, 
because  they  are  in  the  last  instance  due  to  the 
structure  of  the  compound,  and  either  outward 
forces  or  inward  tension  can  turn  the  structure 
into  something  different  from  what  it  was ;  that 
is,  if  the  body  be  plastic  enough  to  maintain  its 
integrity  and  be  not  disrupted  when  its  struc- 
ture yields.  Plasticity,  then,  in  the  wide  sense 
of  the  word,  means  the  possession  of  a  structure 
weak  enough  to  yield  to  an  influence,  but 
strong  enough  not  to  yield  all  at  once.  Organic 
matter,  especially  nervous  tissue,  seems  en- 
dowed with  a  very  extraordinary  degree  of 
plasticity  of  this  sort,  so  that  we  may  say  with- 
out hesitation,  that  the  phenomena  of  habit  in 
living  beings  are  due  to  the  plasticity  of  the 
organic  materials  of  which  theit  bodies  are 
composed.  At  the  outset,  more  force  is  re- 
quired to  overcome ;  the  overcoming  of  the 
resistance  is  a  phenomenon  of  habituation.  In 
the  nervous  system  itself,  it  is  well  known  how 
many  so-called  functional  diseases  seem  to  keep 
themselves  going  simply  because  they  happen 
to  have  once  begun,  and  how  the  forcible  cut- 
ting short  by  medicine  of  a  few  attacks  is  often 
sufficient  to  enable  the  physiological  forces  to 


184  Child    Culture 

get  possession  of  the  field  again,  and  to  bring 
the  organs  back  to  functions  of  health.  And, 
to  take  what  are  more  obviously  habits,  the 
success  with  which  a  weaning  treatment  can 
often  be  applied  to  the  victims  of  unhealthy 
indulgence  of  passion,  or  of  mere  complaining, 
or  irascible  disposition,  shows  us  how  much  the 
morbid  manifestations  themselves  were  due  to 
the  mere  inertia  of  the  nervous  organs,  when 
once  launched  on  a  false  career. 

"Habit  simplifies  our  movements,  makes 
them  accurate,  and  diminishes  fatigue.  Man  is 
born  with  a  tendency  to  do  more  things  than 
he  has  ready  made  arrangements  for  in  his 
nerve  centres.  If  practice  did  not  make  per- 
fect, nor  habit  economize  the  expense  of  nerv- 
ous muscular  energy,  he  would  be  in  a  sorry 
plight.  As  Dr.  Maudsley  says  in  '  Physiology 
of  Mind :  *  *  If  an  act  becomes  no  easier  after 
being  done  several  times,  if  the  careful  direc- 
tion of  consciousness  were  necessary  to  its  ac- 
complishment on  each  occasion,  it  is  evident 
that  the  whole  activity  of  a  lifetime  might  be 
confined  to  one  or  two  deeds — that  no  progress 
could  take  place  in  development.  A  man  might 
be  occupied  all  day  in  dressing  or  undressing 
himself;  the  attitude  of  his  body  would  absorb 
all  his  attention  and  energy,  the  washing  of 
his  hands  or  the  fastening  of  a  button  would 
be  as  difficult  to  him  on  each  occasion  as  to  the 


Habits  of  Childhood  185 

child  on  its  first  trial,  and  he  would  further- 
more be  completely  exhausted  by  his  exer- 
tions— therefore  habit  diminishes  the  conscious 
attention  with  which  our  acts  are  performed. 

"  Habit  is  thus  the  enormous  flywheel  of  so- 
ciety, its  most  precious  conservative  agent.  It 
alone  is  what  keeps  us  all  within  the  bounds  of 
ordinance,  and  saves  the  children  of  fortune 
from  the  uprising  of  the  poor.  It  alone  pre- 
vents the  hardest  and  the  most  repulsive  walks 
of  life  from  being  deserted  by  those  brought 
up  to  tread  therein.  It  keeps  the  fisherman 
and  the  deck  hand  at  sea  through  the  winter ; 
it  nails  the  countryman  to  his  log  cabin  and  his 
lonely  farm  through  all  the  months  of  snow ; 
it  protects  us  from  invasion  by  the  natives  of 
the  desert  and  the  frozen  zone.  It  dooms  us 
all  to  fight  out  the  battle  of  life  upon  the  lines 
of  our  nurture  or  our  early  choice,  and  to 
make  the  best  of  a  pursuit  that  disagrees,  be- 
cause there  is  no  other  for  which  we  are  fitted, 
and  it  is  too  late  to  begin  again.  It  keeps  dif- 
ferent social  strata  from  mixing. 

*'  Already  at  the  age  of  twenty-five,  you  see 
the  professional  mannerism  settling  down  on 
the  young  commercial  traveller,  on  the  youug 
doctor,  on  the  young  minister,  on  the  young 
attorney.  If  the  period  between  twenty  and 
thirty  is  the  critical  one  in  the  formation  of  in- 
tellectual and  professional   habits,   the  period 


i86  Child    Culture 

below  twenty  is  more  important  still  for  the  fix- 
ing of  the  personal  habits,  such  as  vocalization, 
pronunciation,  gesture,  motion  and  address. 
Hardly  ever  is  a  language  learned  after  twenty 
spoken  without  a  foreign  accent ;  hardly  ever 
can  a  youth  transferred  to  the  society  of  his 
betters  unlearn  the  nasality  and  other  vices  of 
speech  bred  in  him  by  the  association  of  his 
growing  years.  Hardly  ever,  indeed,  no  mat- 
ter how  much  money  there  be  in  his  pocket, 
can  he  ever  learn  to  dress  like  a  gentleman 
born. 

"  The  great  thing  in  all  education  is  to  make 
our  nervous  system  our  ally  instead  of  our 
enemy  !  It  is  to  fund  and  capitalize  our  acqui- 
sitions, and  live  at  ease  upon  the  interest  of  the 
fund.  For  this  we  must  make  automatic  and 
habitual  as  early  as  possible,  as  many  useful 
actions  as  we  can,  and  guard  against  the  grow- 
ing into  ways  that  are  likely  to  be  disadvanta- 
geous to  us,  as  we  should  guard  against  the 
plague.  The  more  of  the  dictates  of  our  daily 
life  we  can  hand  over  to  the  effortless  custodian 
of  automatism,  the  more  our  higher  powers  of 
mind  will  be  set  free  for  their  own  proper 
work."^ 

In  Professor  Bain's  Chapter  on  "  The  Moral 
Habits  "  we  are  given  the  following  maxims  : 
The  first  is  that  in  the  acquisition  of  a  new 

*Prof.  Wm.  James:  "Psychology." 


Habits  of  Childhood  187 

habit,  or  the  leaving  off  of  an  old  one,  we  must 
take  care  to  launch  ourselves  with  as  strong 
and  decided  an  initiative  as  possible.  Accumu- 
late all  the  possible  circumstances  which  shall 
reinforce  the  right  motives ;  this  will  give  your 
new  beginning  such  momentum  that  the  temp- 
tation to  break  down  will  not  occur  as  soon  as 
it  otherwise  might,  and  every  day  during  which 
a  breakdown  is  postponed,  adds  to  the  chances 
of  its  not  occurring  at  all. 

The  second  maxim  is :  "  Never  suffer  an  ex- 
ception to  occur  till  the  new  habit  is  securely 
rooted  in  your  life."  Continuity  of  training  is 
the  great  means  of  making  the  nervous  system  act 
right.  Professor  Bain  says :  "  The  peculiarity 
of  the  moral  habits  contradistinguishing  them 
from  the  intellectual  acquisitions,  is  the  pres- 
ence of  two  hostile  powers,  one  to  be  gradu- 
ally raised  into  the  ascendant  over  the  other. 
It  is  necessary  above  all  things,  in  such  a  situ- 
ation, never  to  lose  a  battle.  Every  gain  on 
the  wrong  side  undoes  the  effect  of  many  con- 
quests on  the  right.  The  essential  precaution, 
therefore,  is  to  regulate  the  two  opposing  powers 
that  the  one  may  have  a  series  of  uninterrupted 
successes,  until  repetition  has  fortified  it  to 
such  a  degree  as  to  enable  it  to  cope  with  the 
opposition  under  any  circumstances  :  this  is  the 
theoretically  best  career  of  mental  progress! 
The  great  need  of  securing  success  at  the  out- 


i88  Child    Culture 

set  is  imperative.  Failure  at  first  is  apt  to 
damp  the  energy  of  all  future  attempts,  whereas 
past  experiences  of  success  nerve  one  to  future 
vigor." 

The  force  of  habit  is  strongly  exemplified  in 
the  case  of  an  old  woman  who  lived  in  extreme 
poverty  in  the  top  story  of  a  miserable  tene- 
ment. Some  philanthropic  friends,  pitying  her 
meagre  sustenance  and  wretched  quarters,  ar- 
ranged for  her  to  spend  two  weeks  in  the  coun- 
try, where  green  grass,  pure  air,  and  fresh  milk 
and  eggs  would  be  hers.  She  went  anticipating 
great  pleasure.  In  a  few  days  those  ladies 
chanced  in  the  building  again  and  were  told  that 
the  old  lady  had  returned ;  they  were  much  sur- 
prised and  went  up  to  her  room  to  ascertain 
the  cause  of  the  short  sojourn.  They  asked 
her  if  she  had  not  been  well  treated  and  well 
fed.  She  replied :  "  Yes,  they  did  everything 
for  me,  but  I  was  lonesome.  I  have  lived  all 
my  life  in  the  excitement  of  tenement  life,  and 
I  missed  it,  and  I  thought  'people  were  better 
than  stumps.'  " 

In  infancy  and  childhood  the  mind  and  dis- 
position are  as  plastic  as  clay,  and  may  be 
moulded  to  whatsoever  is  desired.  If  the  aim 
be  definite,  the  methods  judicious  and  sustained, 
it  is  impossible  to  calculate  what  perfect  habits 
can  be  formed  and  fixed.  There  is  not  suffi- 
cient appreciation  of  the  importance  of  training 


Habits  of  Childhood  189 

at  this  earlj  period,  hence  the  time  is  not  util- 
ized to  its  best  advantage  ;  habits  are,  how- 
ever, constantly  crystallizing,  and  when  the 
parents  awaken  to  the  necessity  of  attending 
to  them,  they  are  already  fixed  to  a  degree,  and 
then  follows  the  labor  of  correcting  what  at 
first  might  have  been  prevented.  The  prevent- 
ive method  is  much  the  easier  for  parents  and 
child,  and  much  the  wiser. 

The  habit  of  obedience,  already  urged  in  a 
previous  chapter,  is  one  of  the  first  to  be  formed 
as  on  it  hang  the  others.  It  is  largely  by  in- 
judicious demands  and  by  irregular  and  incon- 
sistent exactions  that  the  habit  of  disobedience 
is  created  and  fostered.  If  no  one  spoils  and 
no  one  teases  the  child,  he  will  be  found  ame- 
nable to  the  voice  of  authority. 

Habits  of  personal  cleanliness  are  never 
formed  if  not  from  babyhood,  or  in  early 
childhood.  The  daily  ablution  from  head  to 
foot  should  be  as  regular  a  practice  as  the  daily 
meal,  likewise  should  the  cleansing  of  the 
teeth  and  nails.  It  is  not  imperative  that  the 
child  be  at  all  times  immaculately  clean.  He 
cannot  play  with  pleasure  and  spirit  if  his  mind 
be  constantly  fixed  on  guarding  his  body  and 
clothing  from  contact  with  mother  earth ;  the 
contact  is  decidedly  wholesome,  and  his  mind 
gains  more  than  his  body  loses  by  a  free  and 
familiar  association  with  her  occasionally.     If 


igo  Child    Culture 

he  has  a  daily  bath  and  presents  himself  at 
table  with  clean  face,  hands,  nails,  and  clothing, 
and  well  brushed  hair,  he  is  doing  all  in  the  ac- 
quisition of  habits  of  personal  cleanliness  that 
should  be  required  of  him.  The  child's  teeth 
are  often  overlooked  in  the  toilet,  and  because 
the  first  ones  are  temporary  some  parents  hold 
them  unworthy  of  the  daily  scrubbing;  the 
more  care  the  first  ones  receive  the  longer  they 
last,  and  that  adds  to  the  permanency  of  the 
later  ones.  For  the  purpose  of  cleanliness  and 
to  avoid  indigestion  and  toothache,  this  atten- 
tion is  demanded ;  if  the  habit  of  daily  cleans- 
ing the  teeth  is  not  formed  simultaneously  with 
other  personal  habits,  it  is  much  more  diflBcult 
to  establish  later. 

Almost  all  children,  except  babies,  sleep  too 
little ;  when  the  little  bodies  begin  to  run 
around,  they  are  so  actively  and  so  perpetually 
in  motion,  and  at  the  same  time  growing,  that 
they  require  a  great  deal  of  rest  to  enable  them 
to  recuperate  fully.  Children  under  six  years 
of  age  require  at  least  one  short  nap  every  day 
and  early  bed  hours ;  after  that  age  the  early 
retiring  should  continue,  seven  o'clock  in  win- 
ter and  eight  o'clock  in  summer  being  none  too 
early  bed  hours  for  boys  and  girls  under  ten. 

Nothing,  except  exercise,  so  composes  the 
nerves  or  maintains  them  in  wholesome  con- 
dition as  ample  sleep.     Until  they  are  quite 


Habits  of  Childhood  191 

grown  all  girls  and  boys  should  be  permitted  to 
sleep  as  late  as  they  wish  once  a  week ;  thus 
the  system  recuperates  and  incipient  illness,  to 
which  the  system  is  always  more  liable  when  in 
a  semi-exhausted  condition,  is  averted. 

Of  overeating  a  physician  says :  *'  In  all  my 
knowledge  of  children,  I  have  found  most  of 
them  diseased  before  five  years  of  age  with  ir- 
regular and  injudicious  eating.  Dyspepsia  is 
not  an  adult  disease,  but  its  beginnings  are  in 
childhood.  I  profess  to  know,  and  I  can  verify 
my  assertion,  that  there  are  more  dyspeptics 
under  five  years  of  age  than  there  are  over  that. 
I  do  not  know  many  children  that  are  not  dys- 
peptic. The  miseries  of  childhood  and  youth 
are  mostly  of  this  sort.  I  have  made  some 
careful  observations  of  children  during  my  pro- 
fessional calls,  and  I  assure  you  that  at  least 
nine  out  of  ten  are  eating  when  seen  by  me.  I 
can  only  presume  that  they  are  eating  most  of 
the  time.  The  staple  food  of  very  young  chil- 
dren is  cookies  and  fruit.  Of  the  fruit  eaten 
at  proper  times  I  can  say  no  evil,  but  of  the 
cake  there  is  no  good  to  be  said.  The  special 
damage  is  from  the  perpetual  working  of  the 
stomach  and  bowels.  I  do  not  think  it  is  so 
much  the  upper  digestive  tract  as  the  lower 
that  gets  the  damage."  Irregularity  in  eating 
creates  a  morbid  and  irregular  appetite  ;  a  slice 
of  bread  and  butter  and  a  little  fruit  once  be- 


192  Child    Culture 

tween  meals  are  all  that  are  required  for  a  child 
past  babyhood  and  under  six  years  of  age,  and 
after  that  age  the  fruit  should  suffice.  If  their 
appetites  are  adequately  gratified  at  meals  this 
collation  between  meals  will  satisfy  them,  and 
their  appetites  will  be  unspoiled  for  the  next 
meal. 

Order  is  another  important  habit  which  is 
much  more  easily  acquired  in  childhood  than 
at  a  later  period ;  they  who  have  the  most  serv- 
ice at  their  command,  who  have  some  one  to 
gather  up  and  dispose  of  all  their  clothing  as  it 
is  removed,  have  no  opportunity  at  the  forma- 
tive period  of  obtaining  orderly  habits.  The 
maid  can  be  present  to  render  what  service  is 
necessary,  but  she  should  instruct  the  child  to 
open  out  and  tidily  arrange  his  wearing  apparel 
himself  when  he  takes  it  off.  When  one  sees 
grown  girls  and  boys  leave  their  clothing  on  the 
floor  as  they  have  stepped  out  of  it,  or  throw  it 
in  heaps  on  a  chair,  one  can  only  infer  a  failure 
on  the  parents'  part  to  properly  train  them  at 
the  right  period ;  for  one  can  struggle  and  strive 
to  remedy  the  neglect  later,  but  after  the  bad 
habit  has  been  established  the  correction  is  a 
stupendous  task.  I  have  seen  a  child  in  whom 
the  right  habit  was  fixed  undress  himself  when 
half  asleep,  and  never  fail  to  properly  arrange 
his  clothes. 

One  may  distrust  the  intellect  and  the  moral- 


Habits  of  Childhood  193 

ity  of  people  to  whom  disorder  is  of  no  conse- 
quence, for  what  surrounds  us  reflects  very 
largely  what  is  in  us. 

Habits  of  industry,  of  virtue,  of  prayer,  of 
courtesy,  and  of  attention  and  application,  are 
all  much  more  easily  contracted  before  their 
opposites  are  established;  and  if  the  positive 
ones  are  not  first  acquired  the  negative  ones 
will  form  themselves. 

Too  much  commendation  cannot  be  given  the 
habit  of  punctuality ;  if  the  value  of  one's  own 
time  is  not  appreciated  one  should  show  con- 
sideration for  that  of  another.  Persons  of  re- 
sponsibility are  always  more  sensible  to  the 
mischief  of  wasting  minutes,  and  many  busi- 
ness men  are  patronized  and  preferred  on  ac- 
count of  their  recognized  promptness  and  punc- 
tuality. Reliableness  in  regard  to  all  engage- 
ments and  economy  of  time  are  virtues  of  nearly 
all  high-bred  people. 

It  is  a  bad  habit  of  school  children  to  study 
after  dinner  in  the  evening ;  the  body  and  mind 
are  then  both  weary  from  the  day's  activities, 
and  while  the  dinner  is  in  process  of  digestion, 
the  blood  should  not  be  diverted  from  the  di- 
gestive organs  to  the  brain.  The  best  time  for 
study  is  in  the  early  morning,  when  the  head  is 
clear  and  the  body  refreshed,  but  as  that  time 
is  inconvenient  to  many,  the  next  best  time  is 
before  dinner,  after  the  exercise  and  recreation 


194  Child    Culture 

of  the  afternoon  have  rested  the  brain  from 
the  fatigue  of  school  work.  An  hour  and  a 
half  before  dinner  for  the  heavier  and  more 
difficult  work,  and  an  additional  hour  and  a 
half  for  the  lighter  studies  just  before  bedtime, 
are  all  that  any  schoolgirl  or  boy  should  be  re- 
quired to  give  outside  of  school  hours ;  and  for 
children  under  ten,  half  that  time  should  suf- 
fice. No  child  should  be  either  urged  or  per- 
mitted to  study  longer,  as  from  seven  to  nine 
hours  a  day  of  mental  effort  are  all  that  the 
brain  or  eyes  can  endure  without  injury. 

A  child's  natural  modesty  should  never  be 
marred  by  word  or  deed.  It  is  my  belief  that 
it  is  always  violated  if  the  child  is  bathed  or 
undressed  by  a  stranger  after  his  sixth  year; 
unless  he  has  a  nurse  to  whom  he  is  habituated 
for  this  attention  the  mother  herself  should 
assist  him.  Maids  too  often  jokingly,  coarsely 
or  otherwise,  molest  tlie  sense  of  decency  that 
every  properly  trained  child  feels,  so  that  after 
the  age  of  consciousness,  he  should  be  guarded 
from  such  opportunities;  he  should  have  his 
own  dressing-room  and  never  be  exposed  even 
to  the  view  of  other  children.  Modesty  soon 
becomes  a  fixed  habit,  and  its  possessor  will 
respect  it  in  others  and  rebel  against  any  viola- 
tion of  it  in  himself.  Modesty  and  decency  of 
conduct  do  not  insure  purity,  but  they  are 
elements  thereof.     Not  only  is  ignorance  not 


Habits  of  Childhood  195 

purity  but  it  is  oftener  the  destroyer  than  the 
conservator  of  it,  and  many  girls  and  boys 
adopt  unclean  practices  from  utter  ignorance  of 
their  injury  and  bad  effects.  Before  twelve 
years,  they  can  only  be  closely  guarded  and 
watched,  with  a  general  caution  not  to  tamper 
with  their  bodies.  After  that  age,  it  is  the 
mother's  duty  to  make  some  explanation  to  the 
girl  and  boy,  which  shall  impress  upon  them  the 
sacredness  of  sex  and  somewhat  of  its  func- 
tions. Many  mothers  dislike  doing  this,  fear- 
ing they  may  be  robbing  their  children  of  their 
innocence.  There  are  few  cases  in  which  such 
information  at  the  age  named  would  be  pre- 
mature, since  girls  and  boys  after  that  age  will 
observe,  will  be  curious,  and  will  receive  expla- 
nations from  some  source,  and  it  can  be  given 
by  no  one  so  judiciously  and  with  such  a  con- 
servation of  purity  as  by  the  mother.  There 
may  be  some  advantage  in  communicating  this 
knowledge  earlier,  but  there  are  also  many  ob- 
jections to  premature  disclosures,  and  in  most 
cases,  if  the  associations  have  been  right,  cu- 
riosity is  not  awakened  earlier.  If  a  child  how- 
ever asks,  and  his  reason  is  sufficiently  devel- 
oped to  understand,  the  mother  can  explain  as 
far  as  she  thinks  wise,  or  will  satisfy  him,  but  it 
SHOULD  BE  THE  TEUTH  as  far  as  it  goes,  and 
the  subject  should  never  be  treated  otherwise 
than  with  earnestness  and  respect. 


XIV 

HABITS   OF  YOUTH 

The  more  one  observes  the  development  of 
luiman  nature,  the  more  is  one  impressed  with 
the  fact  that  next  to  the  irretrievableuess  of 
birth  comes  the  irretrievableness  of  early  train- 
ing and  education.  The  momentum  of  life  and 
endeavor  receive  direction  during  the  early 
years,  and  right  inspiration  must  be  given 
while  the  heart  and  mind  are  plastic,  and  be- 
fore the  habits  are  completely  formed,  else  one's 
nature  becomes  less  receptive  to  it.  Habits  are 
partly  formed  before  the  age  of  consciousness, 
but  the  spiritual  inspirations  come  after  that 
period,  and  he  who  welcomes  their  advent  con- 
tinues to  have  moral  awakenings  all  through 
life ;  if,  however,  during  the  impressionable 
period  the  inspirations  are  disregarded,  their 
voice  becomes  less  and  less  distinct.  When  one 
realizes  the  stupendous  responsibility  involved 
in  the  training  of  the  young  heart  and  mind 
and  how  often  the  opportunity  is  lost  in  igno- 
rance and  neglect,  one  must  deeply  deplore  that 
the  importance  of  this  training  is  so  often  un- 
appreciated. 

At  the  critical  time  when  the  ideas  are  awak- 
196 


Habits  of  Youth  197 

ening,  when  the  heart  is  searching  for  its 
anchorage  and  the  character  is  building,  the 
minds  of  innumerable  boys  and  girls  receive  no 
higher  nourishment  than  that  afforded  by  the 
study  of  arithmetic,  history,  geography,  some- 
times a  little  music  and  dancing;  and  the 
thoughts  are  entirely  occupied  with  these  and  a 
few  pastimes.  The  deeper  motives  and  high 
principles  of  life  are  either  ignored,  or  are  made 
secondary ;  how  can  nobleness  and  high-mind- 
edness  issue  from  such  sowing  ?  The  good 
grain  must  be  sown  all  along,  and  though  it 
may  be  for  a  time  apparently  unproductive, 
some  day  it  will  put  forth  the  blade  and  come 
into  ear ;  when  the  need  comes  the  growth  will 
be  revealed. 

Happiness  is  not  dependent  on  material  con- 
ditions except  in  the  imaginations  of  those  who 
view  life  falsely  ;  pleasure  may  be  increased  by 
a  plethoric  purse,  but  pleasure  and  happiness 
are  themselves  frequently  divorced,  and  is  not 
that  happiness  which  is  not  dependent  on  sen- 
suous enjoyment  the  higher  and  the  more  en- 
during? If  pleasure  has  been  the  object  of 
existence  in  early  life,  when  one  reaches  the 
meridian  and  is  less  eager  for  the  enjoyments 
which  animal  spirits  crave,  life  seems  very  dark 
and  unattractive  because  the  higher  intellectual 
and  spiritual  resources  have  been  undeveloped. 

It  is  not  advised  that  young  men  and  women 


198  Child    Culture 

renounce  the  world  and  all  its  pleasures,  hut 
that  these  shall  not  always  have  first  place  to 
the  exclusion  of  the  nobler  aims  of  life.  Urge 
upon  young  men  the  value  of  a  symmetrical 
development  so  that  while  they  need  not  deny 
the  benefits  of  money  and  of  business  energy 
and  enterprise,  they  do  not  make  of  material 
gain  a  Juggernaut  Car  that  shall  override  and 
crush  out  all  the  better  spirit  and  nobler  ele- 
ments of  life.  Impress  upon  them  that  its 
possession  is  not  worth  doing  wrong  for,  that 
nothing  in  this  life  is  worth  doing  wrong  for; 
also  that  with  the  acquisition  of  wealth  they 
shall  recognize  the  responsibility  and  moral 
guardianship  thereof.  Teach  them  that  almost 
more  difficult  than  knowing  how  to  acquire  is 
knowing  how  wisely  and  beneficially  to  expend 
it ;  that  it  must  not  be  a  means  of  self-indul- 
gence only,  but  a  power  of  good  for  others  as 
well. 

Young  men  should  be  educated  to  appreciate 
the  higher  qualities  of  womanhood,  the  pure 
soul,  the  strong  conscientiousness,  the  womanly 
tenderness,  and  where  these  can  be  found 
united  with  a  sound  education  there  is  a  basis 
of  a  happier  marriage  than  one  in  which  the 
attraction  is  a  pretty  face,  a  shapely  figure  and 
a  goodly  fortune. 

It  depends  on  the  man's  education  and  the 
influences  of  his  own  home  life  what  qualities 


Habits  of  Youth  199 

he  will  seek  in  a  wife,  and  if  his  own  principles 
are  fixed  and  his  nature  elevated  above  purely 
sensual  lurings,  he  will  consider  the  right  quali- 
fications in  the  selection  of  his  life  companion. 
A  young  man  can  surround  himself  with  no 
greater  safeguard  than  a  confidential  relation 
with  his  mother ;  many  young  men  consider  it 
a  concomitant  of  their  manhood  and  growing 
dignity  to  be  very  reticent  about  all  their  af- 
fairs as  soon  as  they  commence  associating  with 
young  women,  thus  depriving  themselves  of  a 
potent  influence  at  a  time  when  it  is  most  ad- 
vantageous. A  few  mothers  are  indiscreet  and 
do  not  well  guard  the  confidences  that  are  re- 
posed in  them,  and  this  naturally  causes  a 
young  man  to  discontinue  them.  If  the  mother 
is  wise  and  has  the  right  sympathy  with  human 
nature  as  manifest  in  the  youthful  heart,  if  she 
sacredly  guard  confidential  disclosures,  her  sons 
and  daughters  will  be  encouraged  to  confide  in 
her.  It  depends  on  the  spirit  in  which  the  con- 
fidences are  met  whether  the  confider  will  con- 
tinue to  hold  them  desirable  ;  if  the  mother  is 
harsh,  or  curious,  or  too  communicative,  she 
has  only  herself  to  blame,  if  the  cautious  con- 
siders these  disadvantages ;  but  the  joy  and 
profit  of  a  frank  relation  between  a  wise  mother 
and  son,  or  between  mother  and  daughter,  is 
inestimable.  When  it  is  denied  a  careful  in- 
vestigation   of   the   cause    may  convince  the 


200  Child    Culture 

mother  that  either  she  has  not  sought  it  or  that 
she  has,  by  injudicious  treatment,  forfeited  the 
privilege. 

The  evils  of  intemperance  are  so  undeniable 
and  work  such  havoc  with  the  material,  moral 
and  mental  condition  of  so  many  otherwise 
good  and  capable  men  that  it  should  not  be 
necessary  to  warn  a  young  man  against  such  a 
danger.  Somewhere  I  have  said  that  the  possi- 
ble abuse  of  a  good  thing  should  not  vitiate  the 
right  use  of  it;  but,  except  as  medicines,  are 
alcoholic  spirits  ever  a  good  thing  ?  Even  as 
such,  there  are  excellent  substitutes  that  are  far 
less  perilous.  If  one  considers  in  the  abstract 
the  lunacy  of  anyone  putting  a  bottle  of  mad- 
ness into  his  brain,  one  realizes  the  weakness 
of  drinking  intoxicating  beverages.  The  ex- 
cuse, of  course,  always  is,  that  a  little  is  not 
injurious,  but  rather  beneficial,  and  every  drunk- 
ard was  at  first  a  confident,  temperate  drinker. 
True,  there  are  temperaments  that  never  de- 
velop an  inordinate  taste  for  strong  drinks,  that 
never  lose  the  power  to  taste  and  stop.  Yet  so 
long  as  there  are  thousands  struggling  with 
Laocoon  fierceness  to  cast  off  the  dreadful  ser- 
pent that  has  enveloped  them,  so  long  as  the 
harmless  limit  is  being  constantly  passed  by 
those  who  held  themselves  proof  against  it,  and 
so  long  as  crimes,  suicides  and  the  records  of 
police   courts   and  insane  asylums  bear  testi- 


Habits  of  Youth  201 

inony  to  the  strength  of  its  grasp  and  its  deg- 
radations,— the  only  safe  course  for  a  young 
man,  who  can  have  no  assurance  of  the  immun- 
ity of  his  temperament  from  the  fatal  taste,  is 
entirely  to  decline.  Until  the  taste  for  drink 
and  the  habit  of  intemperance  are  acquired,  it 
can  be  no  hardship  to  abstain  from  the  use  of 
liquor,  and  when  the  benefits  and  dangers  are 
so  disproportionate  the  wisdom  of  total  absti- 
nence must  be  conceded. 

Tobacco,  owing  to  the  presence  of  the  poi- 
sonous nicotine  in  its  composition,  injures  the 
brain,  deranges  the  nervous  system,  lowers  the 
life  forces,  and  injures  the  heart  and  lungs.  To 
the  young  it  is  more  injurious  than  to  the  ma- 
ture man,  for  in  the  former  it  saps  the  founda- 
tions of  health,  and  dwarfs  the  body  and  mind 
before  they  have  attained  their  full  develop- 
ment. To  the  highly  organized  temperament, 
to  the  man  whose  sensibilities  are  heightened 
by  culture,  and  to  men  of  sedentary  occupa- 
tions, it  is  an  unmitigated  evil,  for  the  more 
sensitive  the  nerves,  the  more  is  the  irritation 
felt,  and  the  professional  man  has  not  the 
counteraction  of  physical  exercise  that  the 
laboring  man  has.  The  cigarette  habit  is  the 
worst  form  of  the  use  of  tobacco,  and  the  insane 
asylums  of  to-day  are  being  constantly  recruited 
from  excessive  smokers  of  the  cigarette;  if  the 
habit  of  smoking  must  continue,  then  to  reduce 


202  Child    Culture 

the  evil  to  a  minimum,  let  it  be  limited  to  a 
moderate  use  of  the  cigar.  The  derangement 
of  the  nervous  system  by  the  use  of  tobacco 
suggests  the  use  of  the  more  soothing  and 
sedative  alcohol,  and  tobacco  users  are  always 
easier  victims  to  the  more  dangerous  habit  of 
alcoholic  intemperance. 

The  greatest  obstructions  to  the  higher  de- 
velopment of  young  womanhood  are  the  en- 
snarements  of  the  pleasures  and  frivolities  of 
life.  If  inordinate  vanity  and  inordinate  love 
of  pleasure  could  be  stricken  from  the  category 
of  feminine  weaknesses  the  elevation  of  wom- 
an's thought  and  the  purification  of  her  charac- 
ter would  be  greatly  promoted.  These  weak- 
nesses are  the  barnacles  that  weigh  down 
woman's  spiritual  and  intellectual  nature  more 
frequently  than  all  others.  A  false  view  of 
life  engenders  a  love  of  display,  a  strife  for 
social  prestige  and  a  desire  to  outshine  com- 
panions until  these  ambitions  become  the  lead- 
ing motives  of  life.  Right  home  education  and 
a  distilling  of  the  principles  of  true  Christianity 
should  correct  such  false  views  and  afford  nobler 
visions  of  the  great  spiritual  and  intellectual 
possibilities  of  her  nature.  Good  morals  are  a 
woman's  greatest  strength,  and  though  a  high 
standard  for  herself  and  her  girl  friends  is  usu- 
ally exacted,  the  character  of  the  gentlemen 
friends  is  often  overlooked  or  condoned.     She 


Habits  of  Youth  203 

cannot  always  avoid  meeting  men  of  doubtful 
morals,  but  she  can  prevent  such  from  visiting 
her  if  their  laxity  be  known.  At  least  the 
acquaintance  of  a  known  libertine  should  be 
declined,  and  admission  in  the  home  and  to 
one's  friendship  only  accorded  those  of  irre- 
proachable morals. 

One  of  the  greatest  trials  to  which  a  woman 
is  subject,  is  when  she  becomes  the  victim  of 
an  unrequited  affection.  It  is  doubtful  if  even 
the  fulfilment  of  the  suggestion  of  radical 
thinkers  that  women  may  indicate  their  prefer- 
ence to  the  point  of  proposing  themselves, 
would  remedy  the  painful  experience.  If  the 
object  of  her  affections  is  interested,  he  will 
not  be  slow  to  ascertain  the  extent  of  her  in- 
terest, and  if  he  is  not,  she  would  only  add 
humiliation  to  her  already  unhappy  condition. 
There  are  many  delicate  ways  of  expressing 
one's  preference  if  one  feels  safe  in  doing  so, 
and  the  idea  of  woman's  taking  the  initiative 
is  so  repugnant  to  men  as  well  as  to  most 
women  that  its  further  consideration  is  useless. 
If  a  woman  finds  herself  succumbing  to  ^  love 
possibly  unreciprocated,  she  can  stifle  it  in  the 
beginning  by  avoiding  its  object,  and  this 
method  though  a  courageous  one,  will  save  her 
greater  misery.  If  the  partiality  is  already  well 
advanced  before  she  realizes  or  admits  it,  she 
cannot  escape  suffering,  and  will  have  to  bear 


204  Child    Culture 

the  inevitable  with  fortitude,  and  seek  the 
remedies  of  intense  intellectual  activity,  physi- 
cal exercise,  prayer,  and  above  all — time.  By 
indulgence  love  becomes  more  unmanageable, 
and  the  only  safeguard  is  a  strict  avoidance  of 
the  dangerous  pleasure  of  the  young  man's 
society.  Such  action  entails  great  self-disci- 
pline, but  the  advantage  of  this  self-control  to 
the  character  is  very  great.  The  offer  of  a 
young  man's  heart  is  the  greatest  compliment 
that  can  be  paid  one,  and  if  it  is  not  accepted 
the  declining  should  be  made  in  a  way  to  afford 
him  as  little  mortification  as  possible,  as  the 
disappointment  itself  is  a  sufficiently  severe 
blow.  The  refusal,  however,  should  be  unmis- 
takable, that  his  hopes  may  not  be  fed ;  it  is 
kinder  to  have  no  uncertainty.  When  a  young 
man's  attentions  become  marked  and  one  is 
resolved  against  the  suit,  the  resolve  should  be 
indicated,  for  it  is  very  cruel  to  coquette  with 
a  young  man's  feelings  only  to  overthrow  them 
at  last.  Under  any  circumstances  such  pro- 
posals should  be  held  sacred,  and  no  one  but 
the  girl's  parents  is  entitled  to  know  of  them. 
Many  girls  are  so  proud  of  their  conquests  that 
they  lure  lovers  to  the  point  of  declaring  them- 
selves and  then  boast  of  their  victories;  such 
heartless  coquetry  is  in  the  last  degree  selfish 
and  reprehensible,  and  the  vaunting  of  one's 
proposals  unwomanly  and  in  the  worst  possible 


Habits  of  Youth  205 

taste.  The  acceptance  of  valuable  gifts  from 
gentlemen  is  also  to  be  deprecated,  and  books 
or  flowers  occasionally  or  as  anniversary  pres- 
ents, are  all  that  should  be  received.  The  be- 
stowal of  gifts  by  anyone  should  be  recognized 
as  a  privilege  on  the  part  of  the  giver  as  well 
as  of  the  recipient,  for  refined  persons  have  a 
delicacy  in  being  placed  under  obligations  to 
persons  whom  they  do  not  especially  esteem. 
The  fittest  expression  of  one's  good  feeling  and 
generosity  is  a  gift  of  one's  own  workmanship. 
Such  presentation  is  not  only  a  greater  compli- 
ment but  also  evinces  greater  sincerity  than 
does  the  giving  of  a  purchased  present. 

However  warm  one's  friendship  may  be,  or 
however  close  the  association,  a  certain  degree 
of  reserve  should  be  maintained,  and  the 
privacy  of  one's  most  intimate  friend  should 
be  respected.  Young  women  should  also  guard 
against  the  folly  of  confiding  their  private 
affairs  to  their  friends,  enjoining  on  them  a 
secrecy  they  are  not  able  to  observe  themselves ; 
for  nothing  is  truer  than  that  if  one  cannot 
guard  one's  own  tongue  in  behalf  of  one's  own 
interest,  one  cannot  expect  that  the  confidante 
will  practice  greater  self-control.  One,  too,  is 
so  often  deceived  in  the  loyalty  and  disinterest- 
edness of  one's  friends,  and  in  the  enthusiasm 
of  friendship  one's  faith  in  the  other's  constancy 
is  apt  to  be  very  exalted.     At  the  same  time  we 


2o6  Child    Culture 

should  be  worthy  of  the  confidence  of  those 
who  trust  us,  and  when  we  have  pledged  our- 
selves to  secrecy  we  should  be  as  scrupulously 
faithful  to  it  as  to  an  oath,  and  never  receive 
confidences  that  we  do  not  intend  to  respect. 

The  oiBfice  of  true  friendship  is  to  aid  one's 
friend  to  his  best  development,  to  warn  him 
when  he  is  doing  wrong,  to  suggest  the  flaw  in 
his  character  or  conduct,  and  to  guard  him 
against  a  secret  enemy  and  against  his  own  im- 
prudence. This  ideal  relation  is  possible  only 
between  persons  of  rare  sagacity  and  breadth 
of  character ;  nevertheless  it  is  the  perfect  re- 
lation. The  true  friend  does  not  carry  inex- 
cusable and  causeless  gossip  which  is  only  vi- 
cious and  information  of  which  the  recipient  is 
powerless  to  avail  himself;  but  if  slander  is 
abroad,  and  the  knowledge  of  it  enable  the 
slandered  friend  to  refute  or  dislodge  an  unjust 
accusation,  then  it  is  the  office  of  friendship  to 
warn  and  to  give  the  friend  an  opportunity  of 
justifying  himself. 

Perhaps,  instead  of  enumerating  the  various 
errors  and  quicksands  into  which  thoughtless 
girls  and  young  women  are  apt  to  be  drawn,  a 
suggestion  of  the  principles  which  should  guide 
their  conduct  would  be  briefer  and  more  profit- 
able. If  they  will  establish  and  adhere  to  a 
line  of  conduct  including  only  the  highest 
standards ;  if  they  will  live  less  at  random,  but 


Habits  of  Youth  207 

will  study  themselves,  their  powers  and  passions, 
and  marshal  these  into  a  perfect  possession, 
this  self-knowledge,  self-mastery,  and  self-con- 
fidence, at  once  give  motive  and  direction  to 
their  thoughts  and  conduct.  Perfect  self-pos- 
session is  necessary  to  perfect  poise  of  mind 
and  character,  and  the  greatest  essential  of 
all  improvement  is  to  find  oneself.  Self-pos- 
session is  self  measurement,  and  they  who  do 
not  measure  themselves  make  little  progress  in 
their  own  development.  This  self-confidence 
will  also  evolve  the  courage  which  enables  a 
man  or  woman  to  live  his  or  her  own  life,  and 
not  to  be  directed  by  the  opinion  of  others,  but 
by  personal  convictions,  fearing  nothing  but  the 
reproaches  of  the  small  voice  that  rises  noise- 
lessly within. 

There  is  much  agitation  in  current  times  over 
the  preeminence  of  the  sexes,  whether  man  is 
superior  intellectually  to  woman,  or  woman  to 
man ;  whether  he  is  more  capable,  whether  she 
is  more  moral,  and  though  the  disadvantages 
which  originally  precipitated  these  questions 
have  been  largely  removed,  the  discussion  still 
continues.  Sex  is  not  chiefly  a  physical  differ- 
ence, nor  is  intellect  more  characteristic  of  one 
sex  than  of  the  other,  but  the  distinction  of  sex 
is  in  spirit;  it  is  the  masculine  or  feminine  soul 
that  makes  a  true  man  or  woman.  Sometimes 
a  physical  man  has  the  spiritual  attributes  of 


2o8  Child    Culture 

woman ;  sometimes  a  physical  woman  has  the 
masculine  spirit ;  but  the  highest  order  of  men 
and  women  are  they  who  possess  their  own 
quality  in  the  highest  degree.  A  woman  may 
have  a  Titanic  mind  and  still  possess  the  highest 
womanly  qualities  of  soul — the  eternal  feminine; 
there  is  no  incompatibility  between  a  high 
order  of  intellect  and  ineffable  tenderness, 
womanly  receptivity,  and  perfect  purity,  though 
the  prejudice  of  the  world  has  impeded  the  de- 
velopment of  this  combination.  Both  sexes  are 
necessary  to  the  best  progress  of  the  world  ;  in 
the  family  the  man  and  woman  have  joined 
hands  and  interests  and  walk  abreast,  neither 
in  advance  of  the  other ;  why  cannot  this  worthy 
precedent  be  adopted  in  the  civil,  social  and  in- 
dustrial world  as  well  ?  Let  both  be  recognized 
and  both  aid  in  the  administration  of  affairs, 
the  man  doing  the  more  aggressive  work  as 
befits  his  masculine  endowments,  and  the 
woman  doing  the  no  less  important  but  more 
feminine  part.  No  woman  will  be  drawn  into 
political  fields  except  those  who  are  especially 
fitted  therefor ;  and  women  whose  hearts  are  by 
nature  domestic  will  remain  domestic ;  no  ropes 
can  hold  to  that  sphere  those  who  are  not  so 
qualified. 

Through  intellectual  and  ethical  evolution 
woman  will  gradually  come  into  all  her  rights 
and  powers,  if  she  only  keep  the  goal  in  view, 


Habits  of  Youth  209 

and  no  revolution  or  agitation  will  procure  them 
to  her  so  speedily  as  will  a  faithful  development 
of  her  best  self,  and  a  faithful  rendering  of  the 
obligations  already  hers. 


XV 

DOMESTIC  ECONOisrr 

Turning  to  the  strictly  practical  side  of 
home  life,  there  is  much  knowledge  of  the 
house  proper,  its  care  and  economy,  that  is  not 
only  advantageous  but  indispensable  to  its  good 
keeping. 

The  modern  house  is  fitted  with  a  complica- 
tion of  pipes  that  are  necessary  for  its  ventila- 
tion, heating,  water  supply,  lighting  and  re- 
moval of  waste  matter.  From  these,  so  long  as 
they  are  in  good  repair  and  properly  cared  for, 
little  or  no  danger  arises,  but  when  they  are 
out  of  condition  they  distil  poisonous  gases, 
dealing  sickness  and  death  to  the  occupants 
who  breathe  them.  Correct  construction  of  the 
drains  and  proper  connection  with  the  house 
are  insured  in  cities  by  the  surveillance  of  san- 
itary authorities,  but  the  care  of  the  interior 
traps  and  basins  and  the  ventilation  of  the 
house  are  often  neglected.  How  seldom  does 
the  air  of  a  house  seem  pure  and  sweet  to  one 
entering  from  the  fresh  air  outside  ;  when,  how- 
ever, one  has  breathed  the  same  air  for  a  short 
time,  the  impurity  is  less  noticeable,  yet  the  air 
inside  should  always  bear  comparison  with  the 
210 


Domestic   Economy  211 

oxygen  laden  air  of  outdoors,  and  a  stuffy,  close 
atmosphere  indicates  ill  ventilation. 

Many  diseases  are  slowly  produced  by  con- 
tinued breathing  of  bad  air,  and  the  source  is 
seldom  suspected  because  its  effects  are  so 
gradual.  The  blood  that  circulates  through 
the  body  and  carries  vitality  to  the  tissues  is 
pumped  from  the  heart  to  the  lungs  for  aeration, 
and  when  it  has  made  the  circuit  of  the  body, 
returns  to  the  heart  impoverished  and  charged 
with  foul  air,  and  must  each  time  be  supplied 
with  fresh  oxygen  in  the  lungs  which  relieves 
it  of  the  impure  gases  that  it  brings ;  this  cor- 
rection is  in  proportion  to  the  supply  of  pure 
fresh  air  that  it  there  receives.  When  the 
oxygen  is  not  forthcoming  the  poisoned  car- 
bonic acid  gas  continues  to  circulate  through 
the  system  in  its  devitalized  condition,  and  de- 
vitalizing all  the  organs  which  it  is  intended  to 
nourish,  makes  them  an  easy  prey  to  germs  and 
various  diseases.  The  sources  of  impure  air  in 
the  dwelling  are  the  exhalations  of  the  inmates 
and  the  products  of  combustion  derived  from 
artificial  lights  and  food,  and  were  it  not  for  the 
air  that  sifts  through  doors  and  windows,  crev- 
ices and  even  the  walls  of  houses,  one  could 
only  live  in  them  a  comparatively  short  time. 
Open  grates  and  hot  air  draughts  are  the  usual 
means  of  securing  change  of  air,  and  when  these 
are  lacking,  ventilation  should  be  provided  by 


212  Child    Culture 

other  indirect  inlets  and  outlets,  in  order  not 
to  depend  on  the  direct  draught  of  windows  in 
cold  weather. 

Sunshine  is  another  essential  of  good  health, 
and  should  be  admitted  into  every  room  a  part  of 
each  day.  Especially  should  the  children's 
nursery  be  the  sunniest  room  of  all,  for  dark 
rooms  not  only  render  children  delicate  but  are 
very  depressing  to  the  spirits.  In  the  selection 
of  a  dwelling,  there  is  no  more  important  con- 
sideration than  a  sunny  exposure  and  plenty  of 
windows  for  the  admission  of  light  with  which 
no  consideration  of  carpets  should  interfere, 
for  it  is  better  for  them  to  bleach  and  pale 
than  for  the  inmates  of  the  house  to  do  so ;  and 
then  one  can  always  find  floor  coverings  that 
the  sun  does  not  damage. 

The  waste  pipes  of  a  house  should  be  under- 
stood by  the  housekeeper,  as  should  the  manner 
of  ventilating  and  flushing  the  pipes,  and  the 
special  kind  of  trap  in  use  ;  foul  germs  are 
generated  in  the  sewers,  which,  if  not  guarded 
against,  will  find  their  way  into  the  house ; 
lavatories,  sinks,  baths  and  basins  are  sources 
of  danger  if  not  properly  managed.  Frequent 
flushings  and  a  supply  of  water  in  the  traps 
are  necessary,  while  basins  and  sinks  must  be 
absolutely  cleaned  and  closed  when  not  in  use. 

The  kitchen,  laundry  and  refrigerator  waste 
pipes  are   more   liable   to   stoppage   from  the 


Domestic    Economy  213 

collection  of  grease  in  the  water  that  passes 
through  them ;  they  should,  therefore,  at  least 
once  a  week  be  flushed  with  hot  water  and  con- 
centrated lye,  and  all  waste  pipes  especially 
the  water-closet  pipes  are  safer  for  an  occa- 
sional use  of  disinfectant  solutions.  Cesspools 
are  unhealthy  modes  of  disposing  of  waste 
matter,  and  are  a  menace  in  or  near  a  dwelling, 
often  producing  typhoid  and  other  fevers. 

The  entire  house  should  be  constructed  and 
furnished  in  a  manner  that  best  secures  its 
cleanliness.  Close  fitting  carpets  and  heavy 
draperies  are  dust  traps,  the  latter  especially 
great  germ  holders.  The  healthiest  and  clean- 
est method  of  treating  the  floor,  if  it  is  not  of 
hard  wood,  is  to  paint  and  varnish,  or  stain  and 
polish  it  all  over,  and  to  cover  it  with  rugs  that 
can  be  taken  up  and  shaken  frequently ;  then 
one  knows  there  is  no  accumulation  of  dust  un- 
derneath, and  housecleaning  remains  no  longer 
the  housekeeper's  dread,  for  it  may  then  be  a 
gradual  process  instead  of  a  semi-annual  agony. 
Muslin  and  lace  curtains  that  are  easily  laun- 
dered are  the  least  objectionable,  and  all  that  are 
necessary  for  the  bedrooms  at  least.  Heavy 
curtains  gather  and  hold  dust  and  germs  so 
tenaciously  that  they  are  better  dispensed  with. 
For  decoration,  paint  is  preferable  to  wall 
paper,  for  the  latter  affords  lodgment  to  germs 
and  to  insects  of  various  kinds. 


214  Child    Culture 

Beds  and  springs  should  be  thoroughly 
dusted  inside  and  out  and  wiped  with  a  wet 
cloth,  and  the  mattress  brushed  with  a  stiff 
broom  in  every  crevice  once  a  month,  while  at 
least  twice  a  year,  the  entire  woodwork  of  the 
inside  of  the  bed  should  be  washed  with  very 
cold  water,  as  warm  water  tends  to  breed  rather 
than  to  destroy  animal  life.  Beds  should  be 
opened  up  and  the  mattresses  raised  for  a  free 
circulation  of  fresh  air  each  day,  and  ought 
never  to  be  made  up  until  they  have  been  thor- 
oughly ventilated  with  outside  air. 

Man  and  gas  light  each  use  up  the  oxygen  of 
a  room  and  fill  the  air  with  carbonic  acid  gas ; 
a  room,  therefore,  that  is  lighted  artificially  re- 
quires more  ventilation. 

People  who  live  in  overheated  rooms  are  less 
vigorous  than  those  who  live  in  a  moderately 
low  temperature.  To  obtain  the  right  degree 
of  heat  in  cold  weather  is  a  difficult  art ;  65"^  F. 
is  the  right  temperature  for  a  room  for  ordinary 
persons ;  for  convalescents,  babies,  old  people, 
or  those  affected  with  bronchitis  a  temperature 
of  70^  is  advisable. 

Waste  that  contains  any  organic  matter 
whatever,  either  in  a  state  of  decomposition  or 
ready  to  decompose,  should  be  quickly  removed 
and  disposed  of  in  such  a  manner  as  not  to 
affect  the  healthfulness  of  any  place.  No  ac- 
cumulation of  vegetable  matter  should  be  per- 


Domestic   Economy  215 

mitted  in  cellar  or  kitchen,  but  should  be 
burned  or  removed  regularly  and  frequently. 

Illness  and  premature  death  are,  as  a  rule, 
attributable  to  three  conditions :  (1)  injuries 
and  accidents  of  various  kinds ;  (2)  germs  pro- 
ducing infectious  fevers  and  kindred  diseases  ; 
(3)  habits  of  life,  causing  various  chronic  dis- 
orders. Chronic  diseases  of  the  internal  organs 
are  due  to  one's  habits  of  life,  though  no  symp- 
tom of  the  disease  may  be  manifest  for  many 
years.  The  slight  daily  excess  in  food  or  drink 
and  insufficient  fresh  air  and  exercise  are 
sources  of  irritation  to  the  system  which  may 
not  be  felt  at  the  time,  but  which  gradually 
continued  for  twenty  or  more  years  cause  some 
organ  to  succumb.  An  overstimulating  diet 
with  little  muscular  exercise  is  as  pernicious  in 
time  as  an  insufficiency  of  food ;  continued 
overwork  of  either  brain  or  muscles  finally 
prostrates  the  nervous  system,  and  temperance 
in  all  mental  and  physical  indulgences  is  the 
only  sure  way  of  holding  ill  health  at  bay. 

Dirt  is  the  natural  home  of  infectious  germs, 
and  dirty  people  are  seldom  healthy,  for  the  ac- 
cumulation clogs  the  pores  and  obstructs  one 
means  of  discharge  of  waste  matter,  thus 
throwing  additional  impurities  on  the  system, 
or  on  the  other  organs.  Germs,  when  not  con- 
veyed directly  from  person  to  person,  find  lodg- 
ment in  dirt ;  if  it  were  possible  for  a  whole 


2i6  Child    Culture 

nation  to  be  absolutely  clean,  infectious  dis- 
eases would  probably  die  out.  No  adornment 
of  the  person  renders  it  so  attractive  as  perfect 
cleanliness,  and  it  is  due  others  as  well  as  one- 
self. 

What  is  moderation  in  food  and  exercise  in 
one  person,  may  be  excess  in  another,  and  that 
which  is  beneficial  to  one  may  be  harmful  to 
another.  A  man  laboring  hard  out-of-doors, 
can  eat  with  impunity  a  hearty  meal,  from 
which  a  man  of  sedentary  habits  would  suffer. 
A  man  who  lives  out  in  the  air  and  sun  re- 
quires less  sunlight  and  air  in  his  dwelling  than 
does  he  who  seldom  goes  outside. 

Housekeeping  is  woman's  special  vocation, 
and  whatever  her  means  or  her  position  in  life, 
ignorance  of  the  best  methods  of  managing  her 
home  is  a  great  deficiency.  She  must  possess 
not  only  a  theoretical  but  also  a  practical 
knowledge  of  the  details  of  the  various  work 
of  a  house  before  she  is  competent  to  direct  its 
performance.  In  this  country,  when  the  for- 
tunes of  families  are  subject  to  sudden  changes, 
and  when  even  the  possession  of  wealth  cannot 
always  secure  efficient  aid,  domestic  accom- 
plishments are  peculiarly  indispensable,  and  if 
young  girls  have  some  training  in  this  direction 
in  their  mother's  home,  they  are  spared  much 
inconvenience  and  embarrassment  when  they 
later  preside  over  their  own.     The  better  one's 


Domestic   Economy  217 

understanding  of  the  management  of  a  house, 
the  greater  the  economy  of  both  time,  labor 
and  expenditure,  for  notwithstanding  the  im- 
portance of  these  matters,  they  should  not  be 
permitted  to  consume  time  to  the  exclusion  of 
the  cultivation  of  the  higher  nature.  By  sys- 
tem and  good  arrangement,  all  the  work  may 
be  done  in  order  and  due  season,  and  much 
time  be  left  for  other  things.  The  household 
duties  of  some  women  are  never  completed; 
they  can  find  no  time  for  the  cultivation  of 
their  minds  or  for  the  claims  of  philanthropy ; 
let  such  make  a  scrupulous  examination  of 
their  work,  and  by  cutting  off  all  that  is  super- 
fluous, and  considering  the  relative  importance 
of  the  various  duties,  they  will  find  that  such 
retrenchment  will  spare  them  some  hours  for 
better  things.  If  a  woman  be  compelled  to  do 
her  own  cooking,  and  she  confine  it  to  the 
preparation  of  simple,  wholesome,  nutritious 
food,  and  waste  no  time  on  pies,  cake,  pud- 
dings, or  other  deserts,  she  saves  herself  much 
time  and  her  family  much  indigestion,  and  if 
the  time  thus  saved  be  used  in  her  or  her  chil- 
dren's mental  improvement,  has  she  not  made 
a  wiser  use  and  distribution  of  time  and  effort? 
If  the  sewing  of  the  family  devolve  upon  the 
mother,  and  if  the  clothing  be  made  simply, 
and  tucks,  ruffles,  and  embroideries  omitted, 
some  time  can  be  saved,  and  the  children  will 


2i8  Child    Culture 

be  none  the  worse  off  for  the  omission  of  these 
superfluities.  It  is  the  superfluous  work  which 
profits  no  one  and  which  is  as  often  a  disad- 
vantage that  consumes  the  time  of  overworked 
women,  and  after  years  of  such  waste  they 
sometimes  realize  their  mistake.  When  a 
woman's  leisure  time  is  limited,  it  is  far  wiser 
to  spend  it  in  good  reading,  or  in  out-of-door 
exercise,  or  even  in  complete  rest,  than  in  em- 
broidering, or  in  putting  additional  phylacteries 
to  her  children's  garments.  A  due  regard  for 
the  relative  value  of  the  work  to  be  done  and 
a  judicious  distribution  of  one's  time  and  labor, 
will  prove  great  economizers  of  both. 

The  housekeeper  who  presides  over  an  estab- 
lishment containing  one  servant  or  more  will 
also  find  that  a  systematic  regulation  of  the 
work  of  the  house,  assigning  to  each  servant 
and  to  each  day  and  hour  its  specific  work, 
effects  a  great  saving  of  time  and  care.  All 
good  housekeepers  are  systematic,  and  the  serv- 
ice in  such  houses  is  greatly  facilitated.  There 
is  always  time  enough  for  everything  that  one 
truly  desires,  or  ought  to  do ;  if  there  is  an  ap- 
parent lack  of  time,  the  fault  is  certainly  in  the 
arrangement,  and  a  wiser  one  should  be  sought. 

The  amount  of  domestic  work  that  it  be- 
comes one's  duty  to  perform  personally  depends 
on  one's  circumstances;  there  are  many  who 
having  ample  means  have  no  necessity  of  ren- 


Domestic   Economy  219 

dering  any  assistance  in  the  work  of  the  house, 
but  such  work  is  very  beneficial  to  health,  and 
every  young  woman  should  assume  the  care  of 
some  part  of  it,  if  it  is  no  more  than  the  care  of 
her  own  room.  Her  knowledge  extends  if  she 
interests  herself  at  different  times  in  the  various 
departments  of  the  work.  She  thus  gains  a 
practical  acquaintance  with  the  various  kinds 
of  house  duties  which  will  be  of  service  to  her 
whether  she  is  compelled  to  do  her  work  in  her 
own  home  or  only  to  superintend  it. 

Meritorious  as  is  the  performance  of  one's 
household  duties,  it  is  in  better  taste  to  keep 
its  machinery  enclosed  and  not  exposed  to  view, 
so  that  its  existence  will  be  known  only  by  the 
happy  results.  It  is  difficult  for  a  person  whose 
whole  mind  and  interest  are  engrossed  with 
domestic  affairs  not  to  intrude  these  matters  on 
her  friends,  but  they  are  not  edifying  topics  of 
discussion,  and  the  companion  can  scarcely  feel 
the  interest  in  them  that  the  speaker  does; 
therefore  with  their  private  consideration  and 
performance  they  should  be  dismissed  from  the 
mind  if  possible,  certainly  from  the  conversa- 
tion. 

It  is  hoped  that  everyone  recognizes  the  slov- 
enliness of  engaging  in  kitchen  or  any  other 
kind  of  domestic  work  in  other  clothing  than  a 
wash  dress,  and  a  clean  apron,  and  the  hair  cov- 
ered.    Neither  mistress  nor  maid  should  attempt 


220  Child    Culture 

to  cook,  sweep  or  dust,  in  a  silk  or  cloth  dress, 
but  should  be  appropriately  equipped  for  such 
work.  If  the  table  glass  and  china  are  abso- 
lutely clean,  well  wiped  and  free  from  lint,  they 
may  be  very  plain  and  inexpensive.  Though 
the  food  offered  be  very  simple,  if  it  is  well 
cooked  and  served,  one  need  have  no  hesitancy 
in  inviting  one's  most  aristocratic  friend  to  share 
it,  for  true  hospitality  consists  in  something 
higher  than  the  material  offering,  and  a  cordial 
and  gracious  welcome  are  grateful  substitutes 
for  rich  entrees  and  cut  glass.  One  need  never 
be  ashamed  of  any  economy  that  is  necessary, 
and  it  is  an  absurd  weakness  to  try  to  appear 
richer  than  one  is. 

When  girls  and  boys  arrive  at  the  age  of  dis- 
cretion they  should  know  their  father's  circum- 
stances and  the  family  expenses  and  should  be 
ready  to  adapt  themselves  to  both.  No  one  can 
retain  his  or  her  self-respect,  or  is  entitled  to 
the  respect  of  others,  who  lives,  dresses  or  en- 
tertains beyond  what  he  can  reasonably  afford, 
and  the  day  of  retribution,  though  sometimes 
delayed,  arrives  surely.  If  young  people  are 
given  an  allowance  as  liberal  as  the  family's 
financial  circumstances  admit  of  they  learn  tlie 
value  of  money,  the  best  means  of  using  it,  and 
acquire  much  better  judgment  in  their  pur- 
chases than  when  the  parents  can  be  called  on 
ad  libitum. 


Domestic   Economy  22 1 

Every  girl  should  learn  some  profession,  trade, 
or  art  by  which  she  can,  if  ill  fortune  overtake 
her,  maintain  herself  independent  of  relatives 
and  friends.  If  she  possess  special  gifts  or 
talent,  these  will  indicate  the  direction  of  her 
cultivation,  and  though  she  may  learn  many 
things  in  moderation,  she  should  acquire  one 
thing  in  perfection.  Everyone  has  some  possi- 
bility or  adaptability  which  if  properly  trained 
will  secure  her  against  want  and  temptation, 
for  though  fortune  may  be  favorable  to-day,  she 
may  frown  to-morrow,  and  when  one's  resources 
are  developed  in  prosperity  one  can  meet  ad- 
versity more  calmly.  A  family  does  not  live 
within  its  means  that  does  not  provide  for  sud- 
den emergency,  temporary  loss  of  employment 
or  for  the  death  of  the  bread  winner.  A  por- 
tion of  the  income  should  therefore  be  held  as 
a  reserve,  or  contingent  fund.  As  Emerson 
says :  "  When  the  income  by  ever  so  little  ex- 
ceeds the  outgo,  we  have  the  beginning  of 
wealth."  The  greatest  wealth  is  health,  and  no 
economy  that  is  practiced  at  the  expense  of 
health  or  of  a  reasonable  cultivation  of  the 
mind,  can  be  accounted  true  economy.  A  stout 
roof,  wholesome  food,  substantial  and  sufficient 
clothing,  are  all  in  the  interest  of  thrift,  and 
unwise  economies  are  often  the  worst  extrava- 
gancies. 


XVI 

CIVIC   DUTIES 

The  sober  quiet  sense  of  what  a  man  owes 
to  the  community  in  which  he  is  born,  has  been 
found  specially  hard  to  maintain,  says  Mr. 
Bryce,  in  modern  times  and  in  large  countries. 
It  is  comparatively  easy  in  small  republics  or  in 
cities,  but  with  a  vast  population,  the  individual 
is  lost  in  the  multitude.  Mr.  Bryce,  however, 
exhorts  us  to  remember  the  civic  virtue,  and 
tells  how  it  may  best  be  inculcated  in  the 
young.  We  must  cultivate  three  habits,  to 
strive  to  know  what  is  best  for  one's  country  as 
a  whole ;  to  place  when  one  knows  it,  the 
country's  interest  above  party  feeling  or  class 
feeling,  or  any  other  sectional  passion  or  mo- 
tive ;  to  be  willing  to  take  trouble,  personal 
and  even  tedious  trouble,  for  the  well-governing 
of  every  public  community  one  belongs  to,  be 
it  a  township  or  parish,  a  ward  or  a  city,  or  the 
nation  as  a  whole.  And  the  methods  of  form- 
ing these  habits  are  two,  which  of  course,  can- 
not in  practice  be  distinguished,  but  must  go 
hand  in  hand, — the  giving  of  knowledge  re- 
garding the  institutions  of  the  country — 
knowledge  sufficient  to  enable  the  young  citi- 


Civic  Duties  223 

zen  to  comprehend  the  workings — elements 
which  still  dazzle  imagination  from  the  conflicts 
of  fleets  and  armies  of  the  past.  Current  his- 
tory or  elementary  politics,  Mr.  Bryce  thinks, 
would  be  easier  to  teach  than  history  in  the 
usual  sense  of  the  term. 

The  young,  to  the  extent  of  their  under- 
standing, should  not  only  be  instructed  in  the ' 
political  government  of  city,  state  and  nation, 
but  what  is  more  important,  they  should  be 
stimulated  to  an  interest  in  public  affairs  and 
inspired  with  a  sense  of  civic  duty.  As  they 
mature,  the  young  man's  and  young  woman's 
interest  will  be  proportioned  to  the  interest 
which  the  parents  and  their  associates  in  the 
home  manifest  in  such  affairs.  In  England,  in- 
terest in  public  affairs  and  knowledge  of  politi- 
cal movements  are  much  more  general  than 
with  us ;  all  well  educated  women  are  conver- 
sant with  the  political  situation,  its  current 
opportunities,  possibilities,  and  probabilities, 
and  they  enter  into  discussions  of  these  sub- 
jects as  freely  as  do  the  men.  In  this  particular 
they  are  in  advance  of  the  average  American 
woman ;  the  intellectual  life  of  the  latter,  while 
often  profound,  does  not  turn  in  the  direction 
of  politics  or  interest  in  public  affairs,  except 
occasionally  to  their  philanthropic  side.  In 
some  of  the  larger  cities  a  few  women  are  be- 
ginning to  interest  themselves  actively  in  the 


224  Child    Culture 

progress  and  improvement  of  tliose  cities,  and 
the  results  are  eminently  satisfactory.  It  re- 
quires no  more  time  to  participate  in  a  confer- 
ence about  municipal  improvements  than  to 
attend  teas,  receptions  and  card  parties,  and  the 
benefit  to  the  community  is  vastly  greater. 
The  woman  who  has  children  needing  her  pres- 
ence or  has  other  duties  at  home,  should  neglect 
them  neither  for  her  own  pleasure  nor  for  the 
profit  of  any  municipality,  however  great  her 
interest  in  it  may  be.  Yet  may  not  the  many 
women  who  have  no  children,  or  whose  families 
are  grown,  or  they  who  prefer  to  spend  their 
leisure  hours  in  advancing  the  civic  and  social 
life  that  surrounds  them  to  joining  in  the  usual 
frivolities  of  fashionable  life — may  not  these 
women  be  worse  employed  ?  It  is  not  the  op- 
portunity which  draws  women  from  the  domes- 
tic life  but  dissatisfaction  with  the  close  con- 
finement, or  a  greater  taste  for  outside  pleas- 
ures ;  and  yet  desertion  for  the  causes  of 
frivolity  is  never  censured  as  is  desertion  for 
intellectual  purposes.  If  she  does  not  take  an 
active  part,  every  woman  should  at  least  under- 
stand and  interest  herself  in  the  civic  life,  in 
the  material,  social  and  moral  progress  of 
humanity,  and  know  all  of  the  vital  movements 
of  the  country  and  of  the  world. 

In  many  families  there  is  an  utter  dearth  of 
knowledge  or  concern  of  public   affairs ;    the 


Civic  Duties  225 

conversation  revolves  in  the  most  circumscribed 
orbit,  on  the  most  insignificant  occurrences 
which  profit  no  one,  and  which  ultimately  nar- 
row the  mind  and  impoverish  its  quality. 

There  is  no  excuse  for  man's  civic  laxity; 
public  spirit  and  the  promotion  of  human  re- 
forms, however  unbecoming  the  consideration 
of  a  woman  they  may  be  held,  never  reflect 
anything  but  glory  on  man.  His  only  possible 
impediment  is  that  they  sometimes  clash  with 
his  private  interests,  but  until  it  becomes  his 
pleasure  he  should  hold  it  his  duty  to  perform  a 
part  of  the  disinterested  service  which  every  city 
requires,  and  hold  himself  to  a  degree  responsi- 
ble for  municipal  stagnation  and  corruption. 

To  create  an  interest  in  the  younger  members 
of  the  household  one  need  only  to  make  public 
affairs,  philanthropic  movements,  and  social 
progress  topics  of  conversation,  and  to  feel  and 
manifest  a  genuine  interest  in  them  ;  the  inter- 
est of  the  girls  and  boys  will  soon  be  aroused 
if  it  does  not  grow  to  exceed  that  of  the 
parents.  In  how  many  families  are  such  move- 
ments discussed  or  even  touched  on  ?  Unless 
there  is  a  menace  of  war  or  a  presidential 
election  is  impending,  the  average  family  is  as 
unconscious  and  ignorant  of  social  and  political 
conditions  as  was  Robinson  Crusoe  on  his 
lonely  isle.  For  the  right  education  of  their 
children,  parents  should  inform  themselves  and 


226  Child    Culture 

cultivate  familiarity  witli  public  affairs  and 
with  the  progress  of  huniauity  iu  general.  For 
this  reason,  if  for  no  other,  the  mother  should 
enlarge  her  view  and  her  interests  that  she  may 
contribute  to  this  development  of  her  family, 
for  she  is  responsible  for  the  citizenship  of  her 
children.  Politically  the  non-voters  cannot  do 
a  great  deal,  but  they  can  do  something ;  they 
can  desire  the  laws  that  bespeak  the  greatest 
moral  elevation,  the  noblest  living  of  humanity, 
and  they  can  strive  for  the  men  who  stand  for 
the  ethical  as  well  as  for  the  material  advance- 
ment of  the  country,  regardless  of  party  or 
sectional  prejudices. 

Religiously  and  philanthropically,  the  dis- 
franchised class  and  the  future  voters  can  ac- 
complish a  great  deal  more.  If  parents  are  not 
themselves  religiously  inclined  there  are  still 
many  reasons  why  they  should  not  neglect  the 
religious  life,  and  why  they  should  contribute 
to  the  maintainance  of  a  church  and  of  good 
works.  If  their  spiritual  lives  are  poor  and 
sterile,  the  inference  is  that  their  souls  have 
lacked  the  culture  which  enriches  the  spiritual 
nature.  By  uniting  with  some  denomination 
with  whose  creed  they  can  sympathize,  it  mat- 
ters little  which,  they  place  themselves  in  posi- 
tion to  acquire  that  soul  culture  and  develop- 
ment of  which  their  attitude  toward  religion 
indicates  their  need.     If  they  feel  that  it  is  too 


Civic  Duties  227 

late  to  secure  such  development  in  themselves, 
they  will  certainly  not  deprive  their  children  of 
the  spiritual  enrichment  and  ethical  nurture 
which  such  an  alliance  affords.  The  theology 
and  dogma  of  religion  are  less  appealing  to 
persons  who  are  not  by  heredity,  tradition,  or 
early  religious  training  imbued  with  a  taste  for 
it;  and  many  such  decline  religion  in  the  belief 
that  dogma  and  creed  are  its  chief  constituents; 
whereas  if  they  would  yield  themselves  to  its 
spirit, — the  heart  of  religion,  they  would  find  it 
very  attractive  and  elevating. 

If  one  recognizes  in  religion  the  foundation 
of  morals,  if  one  approves  of  the  existence  of 
churches,  then  one  must  admit  that  it  is  one 
man's  duty  as  well  as  another's  to  aid  in  sup- 
porting them.  Any  public  institution  that  re- 
quires support  should  receive  contributions  from 
all  who  desire  to  see  it  prosper,  as  its  existence 
can  only  be  coextensive  with  its  maintainance. 
There  is  as  much  spiritual  poverty  among  the 
finely  clad  and  richly  housed  who  never  open 
their  purses  for  the  support  of  church  or  char- 
ity as  there  is  in  the  tenement  districts ;  and 
the  poverty  of  the  former  is  far  less  excusable 
than  that  of  the  latter  class,  for  the  remedy  is 
more  accessible.  No  one  individual  and  no  one 
organization  can  solve  the  problem  of  human 
misery  and  human  impediment,  but  every  man 
can  do  something  toward  such  solution. 


228  Child    Culture 

It  is  not,  however,  by  the  opening  of  purses 
and  the  handing  over  of  a  few  dollars,  or  a  few 
hundreds,  that  philanthropy  is  best  served; 
relief  is  at  best  but  a  superficial  remedy  and  is 
oftener  a  factor  in  the  creation  of  poverty. 
Gifts  to  the  unworthy  encourage  them  to  con- 
tinue their  worthlessness,  and  indiscriminate 
charity  is  nothing  more  than  a  pauper  factory. 
It  is  a  great  temptation  and  an  easy  discharge 
of  benevolence  to  give  alms  to  the  beggar  who 
moves  us  with  a  pitiful  tale,  and  many  persons 
think  they  do  nobly  when  they  thus  acquit 
their  feelings.  They  do  not  consider  the  fact 
that  the  spirit  of  beggary  is  thus  fostered,  and 
that  it  is  far  more  humane  and  just,  to  ascertain 
the  cause  of  the  condition  and  to  seek  its  re- 
moval. Except  in  temporary  cases,  it  is  found 
that  the  cause  lies  in  serious  mental,  moral,  or 
physical  defect,  often  congenital  and  seldom 
curable.  Prevention  is  the  watchword  of  the 
nineteenth  century  and  will  be  much  more  that 
of  the  twentieth.  The  most  that  can  be  done 
for  the  poisonous  tree  of  adult  age  is  to  lop  off 
its  branches  and  prevent  their  overrunning,  and 
while  humanity  demands  this,  the  great  strokes 
should  be  at  the  root,  and  radical  reform  be 
effected  through  the  child, — the  process, — pre- 
vention. The  foundation  of  all  human  progress, 
mental,  moral  and  material,  lies  in  the  right 
education  of  human  nature.     The  kindergarten 


Civic  Duties  229 

is  one  source  of  right  development,  and  its  prin- 
ciples extended  to  child  life  in  the  home  em- 
phasize that  education,  and  the  resulting  bene- 
fits. It  is  not  only  among  the  poor  that  human 
nature  needs  direction,  but  quite  as  much 
among  the  well-to-do  and  the  wealthy,  whose 
power  gives  increase  of  responsibility.  Some 
one  says  truly: — "If  the  kindergarten  is  the 
luxury  of  the  children  of  the  rich,  it  is  the  vital 
necessity  of  the  children  of  the  poor.  Its  per- 
sonal touch  is  the  best  substitute  for  that  which 
home  ought  to  give  them  but  cannot.  Its  meth- 
ods develop  individuality,  its  occupations  train 
to  dexterity,  and  awaken  that  solemn  joy  of  duty 
done  which  is  the  best  guarantee  of  persevering 
industry.  Its  plays  teach  the  control  of  im- 
pulse, develop  imagination,  and  ally  it  with 
conduct,  as  Matthew  Arnold  has  taught  us  that 
the  social  order  requires.  More  than  all,  these 
plays  are  a  revelation  of  joy,  that  divine  ex- 
perience without  which,  perfection  either  of 
conduct  or  character,  cannot  be  attained.  And 
what  shall  we  say  of  those  sweet  affections, 
those  mutual  forbearings,  those  glad  ministra- 
tions,  that  simple  reverence  for  things  holy, 
which  are  the  very  soul  of  the  kindergarten 
system  ?  Simply  these  alone  are  exclusive  of 
that  kind  of  dependence  which  is  unworthy  of 
human  nature.  Here  then,  in  the  kinder- 
garten, we  find  a  ground  of  hope  for  the  child 


230  Child    Culture 

of  the  tenement  house ;  an  awakened  intelli- 
gence, which,  better  than  all  truant  laws,  will 
secure  his  further  education  ;  a  delight  in  duty 
which  will  keep  him  steady  at  his  work ;  a 
stability  of  character  which  will  fortify  him 
against  temptation ;  a  warmth  of  heart  which 
will  keep  him  true  to  family  and  social  pieties  ; 
a  sense  of  obligation  which  will  make  him  a 
conscientious  citizen ;  an  awakening  to  joy 
which  restores  to  him  his  birthright  as  a  man. 
Not  that  life  will  thereby  become  an  easy 
thing.  Life,  for  nearly  all  the  children  of  the 
poor,  must  continue  to  be  a  bitter  struggle, 
until  the  children  of  the  rich  awaken  to  a  sense 
of  the  obligation  of  privilege.  But  the  struggle 
for  an  independent,  self-respecting  manhood 
will  no  longer  be  against  desperate  odds,  for 
the  three  years  of  kindergarten  with  the  subse- 
quent training  which  they  alone  make  possible, 
are  enough  to  waken  to  life  that  character 
which  makes  a  man  master  of  himself  and  of 
the  conditions  which  environ  him." 

It  has  been  already  suggested  and  the  idea 
will  gain  weight  with  time  and  experience,  that 
criminal  and  viciously  immoral  parents  should 
not  be  entrusted  with  the  rearing  of  their  off- 
spring, for  criminality  is  thereby  multiplied  to 
the  number  of  the  progeny  of  such  parents; 
not  by  the  fact  of  vicious  heredity  alone,  but 
by  the  fact  of  their  environment  and  solidarity. 


Civic  Duties  231 

The  right  of  separation  of  children  from  their 
parents  because  of  physical  abuse  is  recog- 
nized, and  is  not  the  soul  to  be  considered  as  at 
least  the  equal  of  the  body  ?  The  family  is  a 
sacred,  God-given  institution,  and  in  its  rightful 
conditions  the  dearest  and  sweetest  relation  of 
man  on  earth.  But  when  it  deteriorates  to  the 
point  of  imperiling  the  soul,  the  severing  of 
such  ties  becomes  no  hardship  ;  even  if  it  were, 
the  affection  of  vicious  parents  should  be  sacri- 
ficed to  the  spiritual  welfare  of  the  child,  and 
if  their  love  be  right  and  true,  they  will  con- 
cede the  necessity.  What  are  only  tendencies 
in  childhood  become  fixed  qualities  and  often 
diseases  in  adult  age,  and  while  every  effort 
should  be  made  for  recovery  even  there,  results 
of  such  efforts  are  far  from  encouraging.  Until 
preventive  methods  have  been  established  and 
have  done  their  good  work,  alleviation  must 
continue,  but  an  intelligent  study  of  the  cause 
of  the  situation  should  accompany  the  relief, 
and  as  much  thought  and  prescription  be  given 
the  source  as  is  given  its  effects. 

Incompetency  is  as  prolific  a  cause  of  poverty 
as  can  be  found,  and  the  best  philanthropy  is 
now  directing  its  efforts  to  the  industrial  train- 
ing of  inefficient  indigents  which  shall  remove 
such  incapacity.  The  only  true  charity  is  that 
which  helps  a  man  to  help  himself,  and  every 
opportunity   should  be   afforded   the  man  or 


232  Child    Culture 

woman  who  is  willing,  but,  for  any  cause,  un- 
able to  do  his  or  her  best  work. 

Some  service  should  always  be  exacted  of  the 
recipient  of  relief,  if  he  be  not  prostrated  by 
sickness  or  otherwise  disabled.  Continuous 
poverty  is  a  disease  and  should  be  treated  as 
such,  at  the  same  time  relief  should  be  admin- 
istered in  a  manner  that  will,  as  little  as  pos- 
sible, mar  the  applicant's  self-respect,  for  when 
that  is  lost  the  case  becomes  more  hopeless. 
Whatever  is  given  should  be  clean,  wholesome, 
and  offered  in  a  spirit  that  will  not  degrade  the 
recipient,  but  on  the  contrary  awaken  his  self- 
respect. 

Devitalization  is  another  cause  of  continued 
poverty,  for  a  body  that  is  not  well  nourished 
cannot  generate  the  energy  and  vitality  neces- 
sary to  sustain  it  in  labor. 

Ignorance  of  the  best  use  of  money,  the 
proper  foods,  the  most  nourishing  preparation 
of  the  same,  are  all  impediments  which  obstruct 
the  path  of  thrift,  and  it  is  the  office  of  the 
state  and  of  philanthropists  to  redeem  the  poor 
from  their  ignorance  and  to  educate  them  in- 
dustrially. Cooking  schools  will  be  more  ap- 
preciated by  future  philanthropists,  and  sewing 
schools  for  children  and  young  girls  are  indis- 
pensable adjuncts  to  thrift  and  economy  ;  it  is 
astonishing  in  visiting  among  the  poor  to  note 
how  many  women  who  have   reared   families 


Civic  Duties  233 

have  no  use  of  the  needle,  and  to  reflect  what 
a  serious  detriment  such  ignorance  is  to  the 
economy  and  good  order  of  a  family.  "  Bear 
ye  one  another's  burdens  "  is  a  text  of  Scrip- 
ture, which  also  adds  "  For  every  man  must 
bear  his  own  " — that  is  when  by  the  assistance 
of  his  more  fortunate  fellow-man  he  has  been 
made  capable  of  bearing  them  himself.  The 
altruistic  education  must  have  its  beginning  in 
youth;  from  children  contributions  to  charity 
should  never  be  exacted,  for  if  they  be  not 
emanations  of  the  spirit  of  love  and  helpful- 
ness, they  are  valueless.  The  child's  whole 
education  should  tend  to  the  end  to  make  him 
less  selfish,  less  self-centred,  more  impersonal 
than  he  is  by  nature,  and  to  feel  that  no  man 
has  the  moral  right  to  live  for  himself  alone ; 
then,  no  suggestion  of  generosity  will  be  neces- 
sary— it  will  be  the  result  of  his  development. 
While  all  possible  aid  should  be  extended  the 
worthy  and  unfortunate  poor,  more  effort  should 
be  made  to  distinguish  these  from  the  unworthy, 
the  professional  mendicant.  The  soft  head  and 
the  soft  heart  induce  beggary,  and  create  the 
professional  beggar,  who  asks  no  better  subsist- 
ence than  what  comes  from  this  softness.  To 
administer  charity  wisely  and  justly  requires 
much  hard  will  and  sound  judgment.  The 
world  contains  many  sentimentalists  who  are 
unwilling  to  mete  justice  to  a  man,  no  matter 


234  Child    Culture 

how  unworthy  he  may  prove  himself;  their 
sensitive  hearts  refuse  to  witness  suffering, 
however  well  deserved  it  may  be ;  but  true 
philanthropy  and  justice  are  inseparable. 

The  pleasure  of  ministering  to  human  needs 
and  of  relieving  human  misery  and  pain  is 
very  alluring,  and  refusal  to  extend  aid  a  great 
self-denial,  but  when  one  knows  that  such 
methods  only  beget  poverty  and  manifold  un- 
worthiness,  one  has  not  the  right  to  gratify 
one's  own  feelings  to  the  detriment  of  wisdom 
and  justice?  If  a  man  who  is  able  will  not 
work  when  he  has  an  opportunity,  he  should  suf- 
fer, and  hunger  and  freeze  until  be  is  driven  by 
suffering  and  necessity  to  the  right  activity; 
no  man  has  a  right  to  be  a  consumer  who  is  not 
in  some  degree  a  producer.  All  of  God's  laws 
are  hard  when  broken,  and  shall  man  intervene 
between  the  wrong-doer,  and  the  just  results 
and  retribution  of  wrong-doing,  when  God  him- 
self in  his  immutable  laws  has  linked  them  ? 
Man  should  be  ready  to  recognize  the  rights  of 
others,  and  when  he  recognizes  them  he  will 
know  his  duty,  and  should  fulfil  it  whether  it 
be  a  pleasant  or  an  unpleasant  one. 

Society  can  advance  only  in  so  far  as  the  in- 
dividuals which  constitute  it  are  advanced,  and 
individual  interest  is  promoted  by  association 
and  cooperation ;  the  social  man  and  the  indi- 
vidual  are  one  and   inseparable,  and  act  and 


Civic  Duties  235 

re-act  on  each  other.  Socialism,  the  shibboleth 
of  modern  times  can  have  but  one  just  solution 
of  its  problems.  Though  the  real  and  personal 
property  of  the  globe  were  evenly  apportioned 
once  a  year,  at  the  close  of  the  year  the  capable 
and  clear-sighted  men  would  have  increased 
their  portion  a  hundredfold,  and  the  weak  and 
incapable  ones  would  have  lost  theirs ;  so  it  is 
impossible  to  devise  means  that  will  prevent 
greater  accumulations  falling  to  the  master 
minds  of  the  earth,  except  forcibly  and  arbi- 
trarily to  maintain  an  even  distribution  ;  that 
would  mean  stagnation  in  every  department  of 
human  enterprise,  and  standstill  to  all  human 
progress.  Therefore,  the  only  just  solution  of 
the  difficulty  is  the  acknowledgment  on  the 
part  of  the  possessors  of  wealth  of  a  moral 
trusteeship,  of  a  moral  obligation  to  use  sur- 
plus wealth  for  the  general  good.  Such  recog- 
nition can  be  effected  only  by  the  right  moral 
education  of  the  youth  of  the  present  gener- 
ation, who  will  be  the  capitalists  of  the  future. 
Only  by  the  mental  and  moral  education  of  the 
moneyed  class,  and  by  the  moral  and  industrial 
education  of  the  indigent  class,  can  the  prin- 
ciples of  cooperation  be  put  in  operation. 
Every  consideration  of  policy  and  progress,  as 
well  as  the  higher  claims  of  humanity,  calls  for 
a  larger  recognition  of  the  inherent  right  of 
those  who  do  the  manual  work  of  the  world ; 


236  Child    Culture 

and  the  ruling  factors  of  industry  and  society, 
the  men  of  influence  and  power,  should  apply 
the  cooperative  principle  to  institutions  which 
they  control. 

Industrial  institutions  for  the  education  of 
those  who  may  be  made  capable  and  for  the 
employ,  at  less  wages,  of  such  as  are  inher- 
ently weak  and  can  never  be  competent,  must 
be  created  and  largely  maintained  by  the  cap- 
ital of  the  prosperous.  The  number  of  such  in- 
stitutions should  be  limited  only  by  the  num- 
ber of  persons  requiring  such  education  and 
such  assistance,  but  they  should  not  compen- 
sate the  same  as  self-sustaining  industries  not 
operated  for  philanthropic  purposes.  Charity 
work  should  be  hard  and  underpaid  and  de- 
cidedly disadvantageous  compared  with  regular 
work,  otherwise  it  encourages  men  to  depend 
upon  it  who  might  find  work  by  their  own 
efforts  elsewhere.  Charity  institutions  are  only 
intended  as  last  resorts  when  all  others  have 
failed.  The  right  methods  of  philanthropy  are 
those  which  inculcate  the  lessons  of  self-help, 
of  individual  responsibility,  rather  than  de- 
pendence on  outside  aid.  It  is  only  by  com- 
bining the  various  elements  of  industry  into 
free,  voluntary  and  strong  organizations  nnder 
the  direction  of  wise  and  efficient  manage- 
ment that  the  end  of  true  economy  may  be 
subserved  and  the  competition  of  the  world  be 


Civic  Duties  237 

regulated.  It  is  the  underpaid  labor  competing 
with  justly  compensated  labor ;  it  is  the  workers 
under  the  sweating  system  that  degrade  the 
dignity  of  labor,  reduce  its  payment  to  starva- 
tion wages,  and  constitute  the  workman's  worst 
foe.  This  is  the  foe  that  he  should  resist  more 
than  he  resists  the  capitalist,  for  the  latter  will 
then  have  no  alternative  but  to  give  laborer's 
wages  above  the  pauper  level  of  subsistence. 

Upon  this  subject  the  great  Mazzini  gave  the 
Italians  wise  counsel :  "  The  remedy  is  to  be 
found  in  the  union  of  labor  and  capital  in  the 
same  hands.  Association  of  labor  and  the 
division  of  the  fruits  of  labor,  or  rather  the 
profits  of  the  sale  of  its  production  in  propor- 
tion to  the  amount  and  value  of  the  work  done 
by  each,  this  is  the  social  future." 

The  ideal  solution  of  the  problem  of  wage- 
earning  is  the  moral  concession  of  the  capital- 
ist ;  whether  this  method  will  ever  be  practica- 
ble remains  to  be  demonstrated.  When  one 
realizes  the  intense  greed  of  wealth,  the  hard 
crust  of  selfishness  in  which  some  men  are  en- 
cased, it  seems  a  vision  of  far  futurity,  and  the 
poor  wage-earner  may  not  be  able  or  willing  to 
abide  this  millenium.  When  times  are  pros- 
perous, he  gets  only  a  bare  living,  the  "  market 
price  of  his  labor,"  although  the  proprietor  may 
earn  fifty  per  cent,  net  on  his  industry ;  but 
when  hard  times  break  over  a  community  they 


238  Child   Culture 

who  shared  not  in  the  profits  of  prosperity  are 
compelled  to  *'  share  the  losses  "  and  submit  to 
a  reduction  of  wages.  If  the  stipend  of  the 
wage-earner  were  based  on  the  profits  of  the 
business,  then  it  would  be  entirely  just  that  he 
should  share  in  the  losses  sustained  in  an  in- 
dustrial panic. 

If  moral  and  economic  arguments  are  un- 
heeded, monopolies  may  in  time  have  legal  force 
brought  to  bear  on  them,  compelling  them  to 
share  in  a  limited  degree  the  profits  of  their 
industries.  The  ordinary  employer  is  under 
the  same  pressure  as  the  laborer;  he  is  com- 
peting strenuously  and  against  great  odds  with 
the  large  monopolies,  and  cannot  afford  to  in- 
crease the  wages  of  his  workmen.  It  is  the 
great  employers  who  control  immense  capital 
that  reap  the  immense  profits,  and  can  afford 
to  share  them. 

But  to  bring  this  subject  more  strictly  within 
the  confines  of  its  own  domain,  there  is  a  phi- 
lanthropy within  the  reach  of  every  house- 
keeper, which  all  who  have  not  the  leisure  or 
inclination  to  pass  beyond  the  limits  of  the 
home  can  practice ;  that  is  a  consideration  of 
the  servants  of  the  menage.  How  few  Ameri- 
can girls  one  finds  engaged  in  domestic  service ! 
Nearly  all  are  immigrants  or  of  foreign  parent- 
age. Doubtless  one  cause  of  the  reluctance  to 
enter  such  service  is  the  loss  of  individuality  it 


Civic  Duties  239 

entails,  and  the  fact  that  in  the  average  house- 
hold so  little  consideration  is  given  the  comfort 
and  welfare  of  the  servants.  If  the  girl  is  the 
sole  servant  she  is  doomed  to  a  solitary  exist- 
ence ;  she  has  no  one  with  whom  to  converse, 
or  to  sympathize  with  her ;  being  the  only  serv- 
ant she  has  fewer  opportunities  of  escaping 
from  her  solitude,  as  she  is  always  more  indis- 
pensable than  where  there  are  several  servants. 
She  has,  however,  the  advantage  of  occupying 
her  room  and  bed  alone,  and  this  privacy  is  so 
precious  to  some  girls  that  they  are  willing  to 
endure  all  the  disadvantages  of  being  a  lone 
servant  to  have  that  one  privilege.  No  matter 
how  many  servants  there  are,  they  should  each 
have  a  separate  bed  and  a  private  washroom ;  a 
self-respe6ting  girl  has  the  same  sense  of  mod- 
esty as  her  mistress  has,  and  finds  it  as  great  a 
hardship  to  be  compelled  to  perform  the  details 
of  her  toilet  before  the  eyes  of  another.  A  half 
hour  of  leisure,  at  least,  should  be  accorded 
servants  in  the  afternoon  that  they  may  recuper- 
ate and  freshen  up  their  toilets.  If  they  rise 
at  five  or  six  o'clock,  they  should  not  be  obliged 
to  wait  for  a  cup  of  coffee  until  after  the  family 
breakfast  at  perhaps  nine  or  ten  o'clock.  If  it 
is  a  serious  derangement  of  household  affairs 
for  them  to  have  their  breakfast  earlier,  they 
should  be  permitted  coffee,  bread  and  butter, 
previous  to  the  regular  breakfast ;  the  time  from 


240  Child    Culture 

eight  in  the  evening  to  nine  the  next  morning, 
— three  hours  after  rising — is  too  long  a  fast  to 
require  of  them.  When  a  girl  has  been  con- 
fined to  the  house  all  day,  especially  if  her  oc- 
cupation is  of  a  sedentary  nature,  she  should  be 
encouraged  to  go  out  for  exercise  and  fresh  air 
in  the  evening,  and  even  to  seek  the  society  of 
her  friends.  Carefully  selected  books  and  sto- 
ries should  be  placed  at  the  disposal  of  servants 
for  perusal  in  leisure  moments,  and  many  little 
considerations  shown  which  will  attach  them  to 
the  family  and  make  them  feel  that  they  are 
in  a  Christian  home.  In  many  ways  domestic 
service  is  more  educative  to  a  girl  than  shop  or 
factory  work  can  be,  for  if  she  is  in  contact 
with  refined,  cultured  people,  she  is  instructed 
in  habits  of  order  and  neatness  and  the  art  of 
decent  living  which  will  be  advantageous  to  her 
when  she  goes  to  a  home  of  her  own.  The  as- 
sociation, morally,  should  also  benefit  her,  and 
the  observation  of  the  ways  of  superior,  well- 
disciplined  people — if  she  is  so  fortunate  as  to 
serve  such — should  be  a  distinct  gain  to  her. 
Mothers  and  housekeepers  have  a  greater  re- 
sponsibility in  this  matter  than  they  often  real- 
ize ;  we  are  all  our  sisters'  keepers,  and  no  one 
should  go  forth  from  our  roof  and  our  employ 
without  an  increase  in  knowledge,  more  refined 
manners  and  higher  principles  than  when  she 
entered  under  it. 


^ 


14  DAY  USE 

RETURN  TO  DESK  FROM  WHICH  BORROWED 

LOAN  DEPT. 

This  book  is  due  on  the  last  date  stamped  below  or 

on  the  date  to  which  renewed. 

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UC INTERLIBRARY  LOAN 


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UNIV.  OF  CALIF.,  BFRIL, 


LD  2lA-45m-9.'67 
CH5067sl0)476B 


General  Library 

University  of  California 

Berkeley 


YR  07510 


